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ROY X CONE contest, 1.1.11 - 2.1.12


Paul T

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I just talked to ROY a little while ago- it looks like events are conspiring against the contest starting in a timely fashion. ROY had all four wisdom teeth out, then got hit by a nasty flu, so was off to a late start getting production under way (he was ironing my fly placket while we talked, which sounds dirtier than it actually was).

In addition, overseas shipping from and to the US is exceptionally slow right now in reaction to the ink cartridge bombing plot that went through Yemen recently, so it is looking increasingly unlikely that everyone's jeans will get to them before the new Year.

We'll need to play it by ear and start the contest as soon as everyone's jeans have arrived, which should still be in early January. But we all should plan alternate New Year's apparel. :(

Excepting of course rnr and TG76, who said they already received their jeans. I asked ROY about that- he said that he checked them out on Sufu and looked over their fits, and since they obviously stood no chance of winning he sent them some test jeans that didn't turn out so well. So you two can go ahead and start losing whenever you like.

Were you wearing them at the time?

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1 You shall show no mercy.

2 Do not cry over spilled coffee and mustard stains

3 If in doubt how many days - take a picture

4 Who say's you can't wear them to a wedding ?

5 You want to wash when you want to wash and yes, you can.

6 Take jawns off only when you have to.

7 Stop staring at your crotch.

Sounds good...

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In addition, overseas shipping from and to the US is exceptionally slow right now in reaction to the ink cartridge bombing plot that went through Yemen recently, so it is looking increasingly unlikely that everyone's jeans will get to them before the new Year..

for overseas fellows:

just to give a positive note : i had my pea coat from SE in 4 days and some stuff from japan in 3... so i am not really worried about packs coming from US now.... last month was horrible but these days seem over. .....

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ROY mentioned he'd take some photos when he told us he'd be a little late.

Today I got this message:

"Hey there,

" I was taking pictures today, but I had realized while taking them that I can't take any that don't give away what the jeans look like. I want the details to be a surprise, so you guys will just have to be patient. It won't be that much longer."

So, on the bright side - there sound to be some funky details we don't know about.

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I have a newborn boy with acid reflux. The sleeping routine is hellish. I switch off with the ol' lady every couple hours holding the kid upright so he doesn't choke on his stomach acid as he falls asleep -- two hour stretches at a time on bad nights. It leads to some unusual meditations -- random stuff bubbles up and then keeps running through my mind. Once, for a whole week, I thought about cartoon depictions of banana splits while bouncing the boy in a dark bedroom. Another stretch of days had me thinking about miner photos ala Jeans of the Old West (no homo). Since the start of this, however, it's been ROY, ROY and more ROY. I suspect the next two weeks will be very, very long ones. Here's to coffee, Roy Slaper and a good night's sleep. God speed the denim guru of Oakland. May your chainstitch be straight and your indigo-stained digits strong.

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^Have you asked the doctor about medication? My daughter was on liquid Zantac as a baby, and it made a world of difference! Good luck, man.

Just three so far, Doc, but there are a couple days left.

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^Yup, baby Prevacid. Great during the day -- huge difference. Sleepy time is another story, however. It's just part of the process. As they say, "The only way out of winter is through it."

I am thinking, though, that I should slip the ROYs on at 3 a.m. for some nice rocking chair fadez...

Stay tuned: There will be a vasectomy post sometime in the summer.

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Cinch back + bed sheets = fail :P

^Yup, baby Prevacid. Great during the day -- huge difference. Sleepy time is another story, however. It's just part of the process. As they say, "The only way out of winter is through it."

Good luck with it all man.

I would recommend thickening your baby's feeds with special thickening agents, may help with the night time situation - parents usually find this quite helpful before starting on medications.

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just once?

bonus points for monthly, weekly and daily?

The secret to my winning this thing was "fuck fades" as the judges called them.

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The secret to my winning this thing was "fuck fades" as the judges called them.

In that possible future, I will have heard that rnr won by providing sexual favors to all of the judges and other contestants. The great irony is, he put so much wear on his ROYs by scurrying around and putting out in every conceivable way, that he would have won anyway.

Now that we all know his strategy and can avoid his advances, possible Rough 'N' Ready SWITCH-hitter-winning future canceled.

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Hey, hey, hey. I live by the Malcolm X credo. So how I win is how I win. The endgame is all that matters.

malcolm-x-by-any-means-necessary-5000082.jpg

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Can the Planed Parenthood clinic get chlamydia stains out of jeans?

Yep they sure can... from experience of course.

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