superconfessional

[broneck]

i'm drunk.

is there a thread for this?

[mr fluffernutter]

you're probably too drunk to find it yourself then huh?

[Lab]

After going through O'Hare security screenings, I saw a 9 year old run into the women's bathroom. I figure, since he was just a kid, it wouldn't be a big deal and he'd be shooo'd out by his mom or whatever. I walk to a nearby news stand, gettin' my New Yorker on, noticin' that Namesake author's writing again, and boom.

I hear "Al-Qaeda-has-a-boxcutter-to-my-throat" screams, like the threat level had been raised to Lanvin fuschia. Fucking brutal. I turn around, and this elderly bitch was chasing after the kid, probably cause he sneaked a peak at her leaking batcave. She probably needs a good Alfred now and then to maintain some structural validity. I wonder if she's got a giant penny lodged in her clitoris too.

[Caps Lock]

30 Days Of Night sucked big time.

[Brooklyn Zoo]

i am 19.

i was just pulled over.

in cali, an underage DUI is basically death

the copspulled me over

saw my eyes were red

searched the car

didnt find shit

wrote me up for some bullshit "running a red light" and "no seatbelt"

both of which im 80% sure are false

i am/was too drunk to be 100%

honestly i cant remember

but they took my FAKE ID

my age was (accordingly) 21 and my drivers licence # is completely off

does it/will it count??

[samsikle]

i am 19.

i was just pulled over.

in cali, an underage DUI is basically death

the copspulled me over

saw my eyes were red

searched the car

didnt find shit

wrote me up for some bullshit "running a red light" and "no seatbelt"

both of which im 80% sure are false

i am/was too drunk to be 100%

honestly i cant remember

but they took my FAKE ID

my age was (accordingly) 21 and my drivers licence # is completely off

does it/will it count??

dead man walkin'

[rome1]

No breathie? No DUI charges? I'd say your in the clear if they didn't do either and just took your fake. consider yourself really lucky.

[ExileOnMainSt]

^^ personal experience + microeconomics =

if you have a penny in your car that was minted before 1982, its real copper. suck on the thing until you have to take the breathalizer or keep it under your tongue, copper fucks up the machine.

doesnt matter if the penny is american/canadian. thats the time when the price of copper got higher than the actual penny itself.

[home]

^^ personal experience + microeconomics =

if you have a penny in your car that was minted before 1982, its real copper. suck on the thing until you have to take the breathalizer or keep it under your tongue, copper fucks up the machine.

doesnt matter if the penny is american/canadian. thats the time when the price of copper got higher than the actual penny itself.

no shit?

123456

[yuljo]

^^ personal experience + microeconomics =

if you have a penny in your car that was minted before 1982, its real copper. suck on the thing until you have to take the breathalizer or keep it under your tongue, copper fucks up the machine.

doesnt matter if the penny is american/canadian. thats the time when the price of copper got higher than the actual penny itself.

There was a mythbusters episode about this and that didn't work

[ExileOnMainSt]

was the mythbusters just on the regular penny or a penny from the 70s with real copper? ive done it before, i avoided a full blown DUI with a 12 hour by only blowing a warn after sucking on a penny.

Another tip for all you drunk drivers this holiday season: if you guys get pulled over and your juiced, and you know that there gonna make you blow. When they ask you if you've had anything to drink say actually I JUST drank my last beer, they have to give you 15-30 minutes time so your last beer doesnt over exaggerate the results. I call it the 20 minute timeout.

[home]

I call it the 20 minute timeout.

Gives you time to find that copper penny. Ha.

In Australia, if you blow over the limit, they then blood test you for accurate results (generally 15 odd minutes have passed by the time they actually draw blood). These are the figures they use for issuing warnings/tickets/suspension/etc.

[chronoaug]

A young cop friend i know said that if you drive drunk every once in awhile, always carry a card with all of your information on it. That way, if you get into a small wreck, you can just give the person your card, go home and then perhaps call that person. Even if the person gets really pissed and wants the cop to file a fleeing the scene violation, it's a million times better than waiting for the cop and him giving you a drunk test.

He said that if a cop flashes his lights at you for drunk swerving or whatever, it's almost better to just keep driving until you get home and go inside real quick. Politely open the door for the cop, but he can't charge you with a DUI or anything because you could say you got nervous, fled home and took a shot. Sounds kinda much, but i guess it's all better than a DUI. I have 2 friends that have had them and it's fucking serious.

[travisio]

the spirits/demons in my house are acting up and i'm pretty scared, it hasn't been this bad in awhile.

[Egpt]

the spirits/demons in my house are acting up and i'm pretty scared, it hasn't been this bad in awhile.

it's christmas, they'r having a party

[Brooklyn Zoo]

No breathie? No DUI charges? I'd say your in the clear if they didn't do either and just took your fake. consider yourself really lucky.

they didnt take my fake, they used my fake as my real ID

bogus driver license # and DOB but everything else on my fake is true

then they gave me my fake back

and to think vons denied me a week ago...

fuckin old hag

but does this/will this ticket count?

theres info that is completely inaccurate on the ticket?

[chronoaug]

Hahahahaha. I have no idea what happens with that. I really hope you can get out of that on some kind of loophole because the cop couldn't tell it was fake.

[Leonard Leroy]

Man, I don't even drink and you guys are scaring the shit out of me with DUI charges. I hate cops.

[kyo]

they didnt take my fake, they used my fake as my real ID

bogus driver license # and DOB but everything else on my fake is true

then they gave me my fake back

and to think vons denied me a week ago...

fuckin old hag

but does this/will this ticket count?

theres info that is completely inaccurate on the ticket?

if/when they find out that you're in possession of a fake id, expect a pretty hefty fine at least.

[Serge]

if/when they find out that you're in possession of a fake id, expect a pretty hefty fine at least.

expect worse

one of my friend's got caught with a fake id went to juvi for a couple weeks and is now on probation

the guy who made it had all his computer equipment taken away so they could search it and see if he was "helping criminals get into the country" with his fake IDs.

Mind you, these were shitty as hell fakes.

[sybaritical]

I have to confess that Victoria Beckham is so groundbreakingly unattractive to me that it's almost irritating.

[JohnnyRed]

I have to confess that Victoria Beckham is so groundbreakingly unattractive to me that it's almost irritating.

I woulda married at least 3 of the other Spice Girls though

[timber]

This isn't a confession, this is more of a tattletale:

Diamonds is eating expired meats.

[artificialsky]

timber, show me on the doll where diamonds touched you.

[timber]

[Guest]

This isn't a confession, this is more of a tattletale:

Diamonds is eating expired meats.

snitch

10char

[azn8oi]

anything to maintain that sufu figure.

[artificialsky]

I just want this to be historical proof that I told him, 'don't do it!'.

for when? when he dies of e coli?

[mr fluffernutter]

SNITCH MUCH??

[turcy.]

the spirits/demons in my house are acting up and i'm pretty scared, it hasn't been this bad in awhile.

what are they doin? chewing with their mouths open? talking back? not passing the milk at the dinner table when first asked?