superconfessional

[kunk75]

joey, what sizes and styles will you have and can you put stuff aside for me?

I kid. I kid.

[jane]

jeepster, tell us about it, im curious...

i mean if you want to impress them it has to be pretty good because most people have pretty insane families

[kunk75]

not to interrupt but i'll play. jeep see if you can do better.

i grew up with my mom downstairs and my gparents upstairs.

my mom his her pregnancy til she was literally ready to give birth. she told my grandmother she was having a baby. my grandmother said when. she said now. truth.

also, i grew up with two grandfathers on my mom's side. my grandmother was forced to marry my gpa #1, then met Gpa #2 and they all lived together til my 2 gpas died this year. also truth.

this is partly why i'm a fucking disaster. and this was in brooklyn, not appalachia, mind you.

[onemancult]

are you some kind of backwards pollack.

[kunk75]

no, my grandmother was fucking rich but from a really bizarre family. english, here since like 1680.

my mom hid the pregnancy cause they hated my father, who was off the boat croatian and therefore no good. they were together til i was a preschooler.

[dismalfuture]

Did you find the golden ticket and finally get to see the chocolate factory, kunk?

[kunk75]

i know, this is basically an endless fountain of potential for humor.

it's taken my friends a million years to make sense of this. my kids ask who's who and think it's beyond bizarre.

[jane]

someone can beat kunk i know they can

[2000dB]

2000db. bless i think

sorry, only wearing silky dresses now, sans underwear of course.

[Scais]

secretly, we area all related to kunk.

today i shit on the bathroom rug at work, and it looked exactly like how shit looks in cartoons. A perfect swirl.

[jeepster]

haha, it wasn't the only thing I talked about, but I did make a point to outline my benignly eccentric extended family

They're all fairly ordinary but they all have these small things that make each of them like a caricature of something that would appear in a Wes Anderson film. Nothing as supremely odd as Kunk's grandparents, but my dad's sisters are a riot and my mom's sisters are characters.

I could go into it right now, but I'm fairly exhausted from today, so remind me tomorrow and I'll lay out all 7 sisters, 5 husbands, 8 children, lesbian-partners, bizarro-boyfriends, and assorted fun that is my family.

They're pretty harmless though.

EDIT: I won't beat Kunk, none of them live with me on a regular basis and I'm not emotionally stunted because of them, sorry Jane :\

PM me and I'll give you the full low-down sometime, otherwise it would be another long jeepster-post.

[dismalfuture]

you have 7 sisters? can i holler? I think there is only 1 lesbian partner in my family, we are a small clan.

[jeepster]

you have 7 sisters? can i holler? I think there is only 1 lesbian partner in my family, we are a small clan.

all jeeps sisters are giants

are you costanza?

I was unclear

my father has 4 sisters

my mother 2 + 1

sorry for being unclear

I have one sister

not legal

not happening.

[dismalfuture]

7 aunts is still many an aunt, are you Vietnamese?

[jeepster]

7 aunts is still many an aunt, are you Vietnamese?

No, dad's side is Irish-Scottish-Lithuanian

mother's side Romanian-Lithuanian

my family is Jewish.

big and jewish.

EDIT: how many Vietnamese do you know (via the internet or otherwise) that are 6'7" ??? c'monnnnn

[DüM]

I don't have grandfathers. I have never seen them nor heard anything about them ever.

[ProfMonnitoff]

i pretty much have the most boring family ever but my friends' families make up for it

[kunk75]

ever ask?

since i don't really remember him, i ask my mom about my dad. she just zones out.

I don't have grandfathers. I have never seen them nor heard anything about them ever.

[DüM]

oh shit wait, my mom told me about him once. she went to germany alone last year and she was in the mall and she saw him. he did not say hello.

my interesting stuff is everyone's interesting stuff

two of my cousins about my age have kids.

one of my cousins got shot last year.

one of my cousins' friends tried to rob a bank and got shot.

some uncle is in jail for a mad long time, never found out who he killed.

[kunk75]

sucks, dum. i'm 32 and haven't seen or talked to my father in 29 years.

my mom gave it a second shot with someone else and i have a 14 year old sister, but her father and my mom got divorced, too.

basically, my sister is growing up like i did, but without the extended familial support i had and with my mom 56 instead of in her 20s like when she had me.

[cinderella]

I have 1. 65 yr old lesbian, one commie aunt who moved to china in the 1970s and had 2 kids there so she could better serve chairman mao. Her husband also cheated on her with a 'freedom fighter' from the philippines (???)

[red]

i was telling my friend about it a while ago, and i couldnt remember the name. its killing me.

so i think its french. it might be. i know for sure its foreign. from the 60s or 70s. maybe even 80s.

its not a porno.

basically, a mans wife is unhappy so in order to make her happy, he tries to give her to another man. shes still unhappy. she eventually finds happiness when she falls in love with a boy. they try to runaway together, but fail. as the movie ends, we find that she secured a spot as a maid for the boys family, who do not know about their affair.

described with more words:

wife unhappy dont know why husband tries give her to another man, another man is teacher, teacher joins struggle find out why unhappy go to teachers boarding school eat lunch students throw food at one boy, smart, at night boy cant sleep go to unhappy womans room woman lets sleep in bed he peeks at bodyparts while she sleeps, awakes angered, boy cries pursuade her to undress fall in love. he go back home, she tells husband teacher kidnap him to be together boy tells friends dont believe woman walks in and makes out run away together. then something happens, i forget what. as the movie ends, we find that she secured a spot as a maid for the boys family, who do not know about their affair.

[evisu 2000]

one of my grandfather's brother's kids (uncle? not sure if we're related by blood anyway... i'm not entirely sure if any of my grandfather's brothers were actually related to him) got into serious gambling debt maybe 8 or so years ago and jumped off a building in hong kong.

[kunk75]

only 2 people in my entire family can drive. the rest failed repeated road tests because of attention deficit.

my friend's uncle was shot in providence in a train yard over bad gambling debts.

[sawyer]

trade secret: a zeppelin bend is preferable to a sheet bend

[DüM]

check through here maybe

List of films portraying paedophilia or sexual abuse of minors

[evisu 2000]

i think i'm the only kid in my family under 40 who didn't go to college. :eek:

[geekbonchic]

My grandfather was shot in the chest by a loan shark in his car.

[red]

check through here maybe

List of films portraying paedophilia or sexual abuse of minors

nothing .

[DüM]

yeah, I checked through too. I kinda want to find this now.