Djrajio Dating Thread/Advice Column

[newaesthetic]

Hmmm, I could use an outside opinion, since most of my friends are either a) stupid with girls, in relationships, or c) girls themselves.

Been talking to a girl I used to work with a lot more lately. We made plans to check out a pizzeria last week that she hadn't tried yet. Went, had some drinks, it was a pretty good night. She had brought up my ex first, to ask that it was over. When I mentioned some friends were referring to my plans as a date, she agreed that we were infact on one. We went back to her place to just chill and talk some more, and she made plans for me to come by on the weekend to pre-drink with her before we all went out for some belated birthday shit.

Anyways, that was last Saturday. She ended up cancelling last minute on that Saturday; she had been waiting on word of a job interview, heard she didn't get it and was bummed, just wanted to stay in. Told me we'd have to have a raincheque. I haven't heard from her since, and I'm trying to figure out how to approach this. This is what I get for not really being in the game for the past three years.

Oh, and had lunch with another friend who works with her who was asking a lot of questions. The place is already full of people who gossip about any stupid thing, so I imagine it's been brought up that we went on a date.

[6ixes&7evens]

i wasn't expecting this thread to get serious but i guess it took the turn for the best alot of info pouring in. soon this thread will be piled with questions like "how to get this girl to stop calling me" or "how to get this chick off my dick".

[dismalfuture]

easy

tell her you love her

worst advice ever. Unless you like sentencing yourself to life imprisonment and possible death if you get caught playin.

[lawless]

i think that was sarcasm. or he's just retarded.

[Pandemonium]

easy

tell her you love her

worst advice evar.

girls are soppy for dat shit.

fuck an uglier friend of hers and tell her that you can't be with her because her ugly friend is pregs.

of course this may work around in circles and is not recommended unless you have a lot of time and are of healthy emotional wellbeing.

[Pandemonium]

o xit dismal we .

[poly800rock]

Instead the fool wastes his days on Smash Brothers and jacking off to Korean pop stars.

can't rep you again. dammit..

[redgrail]

^me too...

shit i owe djraijio so much rep...

[iamundying]

djrajio, how do you feel about dating older women?

specifically I'm 21, she's 24.

Is this going to be something that's worth pursuing?

[blm14]

Yes. 21 to 24 is nothing.

[LeatherSeatBelt]

Never talk about politics, religion, environmentalism, giving back to society, etc with women. Because if you are on the wrong side of the argument it could backfire and kill the attraction...

Actually I never understood why some men want women that can discuss politics, religion with.

If they want to stimulate their mind, that's what the library is for.

djrajio what do i talk with women about. i have no clue what to say really. whats something that will leech them in.

[redX]

movies, tv shows, travelling, sports, other people you both might know ect ect be creative

[djrajio]

Hmmm, I could use an outside opinion, since most of my friends are either a) stupid with girls, in relationships, or c) girls themselves.

Been talking to a girl I used to work with a lot more lately. We made plans to check out a pizzeria last week that she hadn't tried yet. Went, had some drinks, it was a pretty good night. She had brought up my ex first, to ask that it was over. When I mentioned some friends were referring to my plans as a date, she agreed that we were infact on one. We went back to her place to just chill and talk some more, and she made plans for me to come by on the weekend to pre-drink with her before we all went out for some belated birthday shit.

Anyways, that was last Saturday. She ended up cancelling last minute on that Saturday; she had been waiting on word of a job interview, heard she didn't get it and was bummed, just wanted to stay in. Told me we'd have to have a raincheque. I haven't heard from her since, and I'm trying to figure out how to approach this. This is what I get for not really being in the game for the past three years.

Oh, and had lunch with another friend who works with her who was asking a lot of questions. The place is already full of people who gossip about any stupid thing, so I imagine it's been brought up that we went on a date.

Yo homie. I feel you on the whole LAST MINUTE FLAKING that girls do. THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED TO ME AS WELL LAST NIGHT. Basically been gaming this hot 30 year old and the last two dates went amazing. And by the second date I had the kiss. So when I ask for the third date, she suggests we do a Saturday and we all know Saturdays are "stay over nights" so I thought this was in the bag. So guess what happens three hours before the date?

Yep, she calls and tells me that she is anemic (貧血) and feels awful and can't go out that night. Mind you I set aside my Saturday to hang out with her and dropped plans to hang out with my bros, etc. So obviously I am seriously pissed/bummed.

So what did I do?

I told her: "No problem. I undertand. Take care of yourself"

And that's it.

So how do you recover this?

Well the irony is you can't. Well, actually you could keep asking her out but it will be detrimental.

Why?

Because if a girl has amazing interest in you, she'll go out of her way to see you. If her leg got cut off or she got in some rare sickness, do you think she'd cancel on Brad Pitt? Even if she did, don't you think she'd ask for an alternate date to meet?

Of course she would.

Anyone with high interest would ask to arrange for another day.

But she didn't.

And neither did the girl from last night.

So, what do most chumps do?

They call the next day and ask if she can hang out next week. Or the week after. Anything to get the next date.

This is the wrong way to approach it.

Remember that girls don't operate on logic but on feelings/emotions. So when she cancelled on you because she didn't get the job it wasn't necessarily because she wasn't interested in you, she just wasn't interested in meeting you THAT DAY BECAUSE SHE WASN'T EMOTIONALLY THERE.

It's all about timing.

You might ask a girl out one minute when she is pissed and she'll reject you and then an hour later you could ask again when her emotions are better and she'll accept the date.

That's how they operate.

So if you keep pursuing after the cancel, she'll mentally associate her job loss with you and it will induce negative emotions and you'll be less likely to get the next date. Keep calling and pressuring and it will get worse.

BEST SOLUTION?

Again, don't do anything. Game other chicks and wait for her to come around. If she has any ounce of interest in you, she'll contact you back and make it up to you. Or try again in a month or two, when the negative emotional association is not attached with you and your contact will be pleasent surprise.

[djrajio]

djrajio, how do you feel about dating older women?

specifically I'm 21, she's 24.

Is this going to be something that's worth pursuing?

That's fine. I dated a woman 9 years older than me for over a year and a half.

[djrajio]

djrajio what do i talk with women about. i have no clue what to say really. whats something that will leech them in.

movies, tv shows, travelling, sports, other people you both might know ect ect be creative

Exactly...

[gettoasty]

Hmmm, I could use an outside opinion, since most of my friends are either a) stupid with girls, in relationships, or c) girls themselves.

Been talking to a girl I used to work with a lot more lately. We made plans to check out a pizzeria last week that she hadn't tried yet. Went, had some drinks, it was a pretty good night. She had brought up my ex first, to ask that it was over. When I mentioned some friends were referring to my plans as a date, she agreed that we were infact on one. We went back to her place to just chill and talk some more, and she made plans for me to come by on the weekend to pre-drink with her before we all went out for some belated birthday shit.

Anyways, that was last Saturday. She ended up cancelling last minute on that Saturday; she had been waiting on word of a job interview, heard she didn't get it and was bummed, just wanted to stay in. Told me we'd have to have a raincheque. I haven't heard from her since, and I'm trying to figure out how to approach this. This is what I get for not really being in the game for the past three years.

Oh, and had lunch with another friend who works with her who was asking a lot of questions. The place is already full of people who gossip about any stupid thing, so I imagine it's been brought up that we went on a date.

Reminds me of my predicament , except you took the next step with a date and me... well, I don't want to spend my money on this girl (yet?). Feel ya on the 'being out of game for 3 years,' damn.

[LeatherSeatBelt]

what are my chances with a girl if i said id like to wreck em

[djrajio]

Pretty low.

[Thorns]

My current gf also likes... Well... Girls. She wants to start picking up other girls to bring home for threesomes with me. This sounds like a lot of fun to me, but I'm totally new to the prospect/process. Are there any tips I should know of before jumping into this?

[ajax]

know how to use a camera..

[Oxy.]

where do i find a girl that's similar to ellen page?

[jeepster]

^public high schools in the upper mid-west, probably outside of chicago cause they have an indie-rock scene

[homi29]

thoughts on gaming girls with bfs. id never do it if i knew the guy (bros before hoes concept) and even if i didnt i still dont even like the hassle/ethical considerations.

but its a given that most good girls have guys interested in them at the very least and much more likely are dating already.

[djrajio]

My current gf also likes... Well... Girls. She wants to start picking up other girls to bring home for threesomes with me. This sounds like a lot of fun to me, but I'm totally new to the prospect/process. Are there any tips I should know of before jumping into this?

I have no experience with threesomes, sorry.

[poly800rock]

I have no experience with threesomes, sorry.

foursomes on the other hand, raj has you covered.

[WayneGibbous]

My current gf also likes... Well... Girls. She wants to start picking up other girls to bring home for threesomes with me. This sounds like a lot of fun to me, but I'm totally new to the prospect/process. Are there any tips I should know of before jumping into this?

i have had girls say this shit in the past but then when it gets down to business they are really just full of shit and it never happens.

[djrajio]

thoughts on gaming girls with bfs. id never do it if i knew the guy (bros before hoes concept) and even if i didnt i still dont even like the hassle/ethical considerations.

but its a given that most good girls have guys interested in them at the very least and much more likely are dating already.

Think about it homie:

If a women is willing to leave someone she supposedly cares and loves because you magically swept her off her feet, what makes you think she won't leave you for some other guy.

I wouldn't touch another guy's girl if I knew she had a bf. If she hides the fact she has a bf, then its a different story.

[djrajio]

foursomes on the other hand, raj has you covered.

Thanks for the clarification.

[poly800rock]

Think about it homie:

If a women is willing to leave someone she supposedly cares and loves because you magically swept her off her feet, what makes you think she won't leave you for some other guy.

I wouldn't touch another guy's girl if I knew she had a bf. If she hides the fact she has a bf, then its a different story.

i had a friend a long time ago that gamed a girl who had a bf. then basically when he got it, was like, fuck that, if this bitch is cheating when I'm hooking up, she's cheating later as well.

[djrajio]

i have had girls say this shit in the past but then when it gets down to business they are really just full of shit and it never happens.

This is quite true.

Girls like to fantasize about different sexual possibilities but aren't prepared for the emotional and physical complications that come with actually going ahead and doing these things.

This is also why they like reading gossip magazines and soap operas, etc. It provides them the emotional porn they desire without the nasty after effects.