superconfessional

[ProfMonnitoff]

But it would probably stir some shit up in their relationship if that's your goal.

I DISAGREE

i tried this once (fucking an ex to destabilize her current relationship) and it didnt work

her bf just ended up being mad at me and now i gotta be careful which dark alley i walk in at night

ps this was like 2 weeks ago

[dismalfuture]

professor, you and me are in the same boat, except Im like you 3 weeks ago and youre me 3 weeks in the future. Im gonna fuck that pseudo J beezy from my old work soon, her bf I saw that night with her is disgusting looking and she stood there chatting with me for like 20 minutes while he waited and I made him entertain my dog, so we know we good, just gotta invite her up while my gf is away.

[dismalfuture]

I will make every dude who is with girls i like just babysit my dog while i fuck their gfs, and me and my dog will walk away aferwards going hee hee hee

[homi29]

dismals plate throwing incident is a staple in asian cinema

[dismalfuture]

she had a great tone of voice when she did that too, very classic. Only the boing of the rubber spaghetti was surprising.

[ProfMonnitoff]

professor, you and me are in the same boat, except Im like you 3 weeks ago and youre me 3 weeks in the future. Im gonna fuck that pseudo J beezy from my old work soon, her bf I saw that night with her is disgusting looking and she stood there chatting with me for like 20 minutes while he waited and I made him entertain my dog, so we know we good, just gotta invite her up while my gf is away.

lol i always post shit in the funniest moments

2 minutes after i made that post she texted me (she hasnt texted me in like 10 days)

she just invited me to a party (small, maybe 10 people) at her place

im fairly sure her bf will be there as well

im tempted to go just to see how funny the situation can get

its as if shes reading sufu or something

fuck, what if she is

[dismalfuture]

procure collateral, have intercourse with young maidens

[dismalfuture]

Yeah so I have 3 very similar, all probably insanely crazy J beezys plus 1 pseudo J beezy on my dick at the same time, all 3 are from/in different countries, I want to bone all 3 terribly and all of them could cost me my life, but I love to squirt and they are asking for it, what to do niggazzzz

[dismalfuture]

Girl in Sydney has really cute petite C cups, the pseudo J beezy is tiny but has D cups, and my current gf has E cups, al have brown dyed hair by pseduo J beey curls it in this 60s type way and its mad fucking sexy that plus her G strings and knit dresses... fuck

[billy.]

hope u dont get ass raped wiht hockey sticks moneytuff <3

[redX]

^ same goes for Dismal i guess, i would like to be able to cop dat jawn

[Yardsale]

This is like some straight to dvd romcom type thing that happened last night where they learn some valuable lesson in the end about friendship or something.

so me and my friend go to this show and there's this really cute chick dancing in front of us with two other girls and one guy. as she's leaving we compliment her on her dancing and at first she thinks we're making fun of her, but we have a good laugh and there's some chemistry going on there. she hugs us both and told us it made her night. etc. etc.

like idiots we are, we watch her walk away with our dicks in our hands not doing anything because we were afraid to step on each other's toes.

and so I go home and I post a missed connections on CL just to see. and then this morning my friend calls me up and he's like yo I saw your ad I was trying to do the same thing too! lmao

gaaaaah. now he's going to try and put up an ad to see if she responds.

I need to think up some sort of system for shit like this...rock paper scissors? take turns? somethign

[mrip]

post link to the ad

[billy.]

bernt already fucked her.

[AstroWolf]

post link to the ad

quoted for truth.

[destructodisk]

i am smitten with this girl who works near my house, and I have reason to believe she is with me as well.

i must move quickly, and effectively these next couple of days

[Caps Lock]

I cant believe I actually took advice from a crazy person.

But I did take it with a grain of salt though.

[yoallanface]

i drove for the first time today.

i almost shat myself.

[sawn-off chef]

i just got drunk for the first time in six monthes, what a glorious day, however it was not fun going into work drunk and buying my friend medicine, that sucked. dismal there is nothing hotter than knnit sweaters and gstrings, i envy you sir.

[16steps]

if i dont have sex tonight i will be a loser.

truth

[sawn-off chef]

calm, e a lolsier :[

[sawn-off chef]

ytruh!!!!#@#!!!

[Orion]

I see 666 everywhere. Shit's starting to creep me out. On deposit slips, CC batch totals, invoice #'s, phone #'s, etc...at least once a day. I'm calling the apocalypse. When the world ends, remember that I saw that shit coming.

Also, Scott...ate Mac (deserves a capital M) from Boston Market tonight. So fucking good. I'll UPS a pint to you if you don't got one back East.

fading off with ambien now...trying to keep concentrated...my mind is jjust saying "durrrrrr durr dur durrrrrdur"

[e0d9n0b5]

coming down.. free pills but now I'm lonely as heck and listening to magnetic fields alone.. what ever happened to falling in love??

[sawn-off chef]

i love magnetic fields ednob!

and orion i might be coming to cali in july, so if i do i'll stop by the store around closing time and we'll cop some! but we do have boston markets around me, would kill for some of that mac and cheese last night.

i also went into work yesterday drunk to buy pingpong balls for my friends and i was questioned by my manager about a photo order and had NO IDEA what to say haha

[automaton]

"i am the snuggler"

I've been seeing these shitty ads around for some TV show ( I assume ) called "The Listener" and all I can think about is Zach Galifinakis flying around in his short cut-offs and snuggling those in need

[redgrail]

Fucking love Zach Galifinakis. If you've been sleeping on it, head to funnyordie and watch "Betwen Two Ferns" right now. All of them. Here, I'll make it easy for you:

http://www.funnyordie.com/between_two_ferns

Natalie Portman is in one of them, for all you superjewishbobosloverz.

[freecat]

my feelings would be so hurt if all my friends bought me clothes for my birthday. i mean, i was at a bday party this weekend, good friend from uni.

i got him a vintage leather jacket (that i would wear myself), and from various other friends that didn't consult each other he got two knit, a tee shirt and a jean.

i mean, he sure doesn't dress well, but we all had the same idea for him.

[sistersuzie]

I've been seeing these shitty ads around for some TV show ( I assume ) called "The Listener" and all I can think about is Zach Galifinakis flying around in his short cut-offs and snuggling those in need

"he will snuggle you"

[pieiskewl]

^

R.I.P. my favorite fox Michael J.