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Two Facts About Your Neighborhood


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-apparently hamilton has the highest permanent disability rate per capita in north america (we count how many electric wheelchairs we see when we go downtown, the record is like 18 in a single lunch outing)

lol. 10chars

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Wasn't that city Valencia ? (i'm trying to remember the 6th season)

Yes! That is it...BTW, 6th season sucked balls. Seasons 1-5 = best show ever.

I wrote a poem a while back about my Mom's house in a suburb of Los Angeles called Santa Clarita. I had to stay there one summer and really ended up hating it

These are the statistics of the Santa Clarita Valley

I'll provide the numbers, you keep the tally.

Countless alcoholics, but 1 decent bar...

4 SUV's for every damn car.

Oh yes indeed, 1 diverse population

150,000 white, 50 blacks, and 12 asians

2 fucking legends used to live here in hell

Pee-Wee Herman, and Zack Morris....from Saved by the Bell.

105 degrees every day in the summer

600 Milfs are driving new hummers

2 Home Depots an Osh and a Lowe's,

1 mayor who's too fat to see his own toes

12,000 homes look exactly the same

Only 4 goddamn days, of annual rain

1 public library and 1 sheriff station

And COC, the Crown Jewel of higher education

4 seismic faults, they say are ticking time bombs

Three quarters of adults still live at their mom's

3 of the cops that beat Rodney King down

live here, it's true, I've seen 'em 'round town.

5 dollars at the door, but you know you got screwed

When there's 1 fucking toilet for 300 dudes.

These are the numbers, the math has been done.

Add them together....you get 661.

661 is the area code over there btw...

Valencia/Santa Clarita...same damn thing. That's my hood.

-You forgot to tally all the Latinos who live in Newhall and Canyon Country.

-In high school, I went shopping with Zack Morris's (Mark Paul Gossler) wife, no jokes

-I went to private school with the kids of one of the officers involved in the Rodney King incident. Needless to say, he stopped picking them up from school after that...

-No love for Magic Mountain?

-MILFs galore working out at the gym...memory storage for masterbatory material later


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1. There are at least 3 strip clubs and 2 massage parlours within 10km of me. also a bunch of adult video stores.

2. I am a few blocks away from one of the more affluent areas in the city (but my house aint worth that much). The kids in those houses are all annoying rich white kids who work for their parents businesses because they dont have the motivation, know-how, or intelligence to stand on their own two. I hate hanging out with them but i kinda wish i could meet some girls in the area so i have a palacial home to crash at (thinking driveway basketball, stainless steel kitchens, and hot-tub/HDTV equipped)

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1. way too many vegans

2. way too many frat/sorority people

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