Miscellaneous Musings (Limited Edition)

[Nov Spur]

Genius

Meet the 23-year-old squatter who moved into palatial $2.5MILLION waterfront mansion - but there's nothing neighbors or police can do about it

Adverse possession laws are funny, but unfortunately he'll be kicked out by Monday morning.

[andrewisdope]

action bronson is hilarious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=2Rrm2S3Di1E#t=80s

[broken_dubz]

Yo I really want to grow my hair long and a huge stoner rock beard but ill just look like somebody that bathes in the river Ganges. Or homeless.

[yoallanface]

making continuously shitty decisions. lets hope this is the last one lmao.

Edited January 26, 2013 by yoallanface

[OkayOkay]

wtf late pass / neg rep me whatever, I just watched Archer for the first time and it's fucking hilarious.

[wood 666]

my post rank says "weed69"

sorry sufu community, that i have not realized that this awesome title was at display

also, yesterday when i was cooking/roasting (what do you call it) beefs, it ended up red on the side.

just like i like my pussy. dark red and drippy

(pause)

[freshkills]

slowly starving to death waiting for the mice in my kitchen to die.

can't set foot in there without losing my appetite.

[burgerking]

people so big online.

Edited January 27, 2013 by valdizno

[e0d9n0b5]

weed 69

[philosophiliac]

late pass for any aussies on here but fuckyeahhappy'strayadaykuntttttttttttt

[okonomi]

Part of me has entirely had enough of Australian bogan satire. It's really the least original form of comedy in our country, and too often becomes misappropriated as celebration (even one as clearly non-celebratory as that one). The other part thinks more anti Australian bigotry media must be a good thing.

[ninetynine]

[merry burger]

the who - "who are you, hoo hoo, who who" .mp3

[percy]

the who - "who are you, hoo hoo, who who" .mp3

percy. who you?

[Nov Spur]

we've reached the ocean floor.

[Osmosis Jones]

i think i put a cigarette out on my hand because i have a circular burn in the middle of my left palm.

[merry burger]

I know I'm hungover because I just tried to check my Facebook messages by typing "myspace.com"... like five times...

[junglejane]

my mom taught me how to correctly put out a cigarette on my tongue

..last august

[e0d9n0b5]

pool spit, insert into pool?

[i wear shooes]

NINERS NINERS NINERS NINERS NINERS!!!!!!!!

[okonomi]

Last night while making out I realised I'm one of the freaks who kisses with their eyes open. It's funny that I'd never noticed it before. I tried to force myself to close my eyes but that made me a worse kisser

[ninetynine]

Saw Robert Geller walking with two pretty-boy asians on Mercer lol

[on-display]

Just walked in on a guy pissing two feet away from the urninal. He immediately tried to piss closer when I entered the restroom. Lmao

Edited January 31, 2013 by on-display

[Osmosis Jones]

yesterday was a really terrible day and i've since dubbed it wild wednesdays.

so around noon, I was trying to return a motorcycle key and the associated motorcycle to my ex and she ends up driving over to my friend's house where I was at. She drives up hella fast, pulls over and gets out. The first thing she did was flip everybody off and then start yelling at me. The entire time, my friend is high as hell eating a quesadilla while my ex tries to somehow convince him that I'm a bad person; and on top of that, I'm on the phone with another friend asking me who's yelling in the background. The friend who my ex is yelling at is just trying to get into my truck and not make a scene while she yells at him through the window.

Anyway, we're both in my truck while this crazy bitch is yelling at me through my rear window so I turn around, gesture that I'm on the phone and tell her to shush. Next thing I know, she's jumping up and down on my rear bumper so at that point, I let go of the e brake a bit so maybe, just maybe, she gets off.

She jumps off, cool, my friend and I both turn back around when all of a sudden, my ex rams the back of the truck and thank god I had decided to let my car roll back because otherwise I would have smashed into the car in front of me. We flew forward a good 2 feet and it wasn't just a bumper tap or letting your car idle into somebody but she had her foot down on the gas. So just to help with a visual, I drive an orange Toyota truck that is actually under my ex's name and she drives a beat up Honda Odyssey minivan. There was a driveway's width separating our bumpers. After she rams me, I am still on the phone, tell my friend that my ex just rammed me, put it down and then drop the clutch and ram into the back of her so that I can get myself some room to get out of the parking spot. Then she pulls up next to me and shows me a hat my friend gave her that says "Kill Yo Self" and tried to block my truck in so I open my door a crack and then slam it into her car before I squeeze out of the spot and leave. But of course she follows me for a few blocks tailgating me until I catch a yellow light at full speed.

We get out of the truck a little later, my friend is cussing her name and we look at the back of the truck. Literally no damage, no point of impact, and all because I have a solid steel diamondplate rear bumper. I drop him off at work, we go on about our days while I begin the long process of moving all my vehicles to separate and safer locations that my ex does not know about.

oh and my ex livetweeted the incident but conveniently left out all the funny bits: https://twitter.com/exteeng

in the event that anybody wants to white knight in her honor, we can meet at uniqlo.

Edited February 1, 2013 by Evilcrayon

[fads]

ok! i am ur ratchet sufu claims agent evil 'adhd' crayon regarding ex 'lincoln log' teeng

do u agree to blah blah this conversation will now be recorded blah blah

[e0d9n0b5]

woah lol

[CASSAVA PIECE]

worldstar

[wahwho11]

i was reading it think "is that ex exteeng?" then i read the "kill yo self" hat, then i knew. i lol'd.

Edited January 31, 2013 by wahwho11

[dovo]

damn sorry to here evilcrayon thats some crazy shit.

part of me wishes you would of posted a WAYWT pic with her wildin out in the background though.

[Spaghettini]

The entire time, my friend is high as hell eating a quesadilla

i can't even fathom how badly this kids high was blown