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Superawkward

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 Although everyone in the office has complained, she refuses to let up. We all said somewhere between 73-75 sounds like a pretty decent temp for the office. 

are you black

 

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are you black

 

 

 

You know it.  everyone else is asian. Fat girl is latina. 

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why do we have to call her patty?

you are what you eat

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1524689_10207343151396285_68259430491703

 

word...

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is that diet pepsi

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Theres a  fat girl in my office that has recently made it her life goal to make the office as cold as humanly possible. Although everyone in the office has complained, she refuses to let up. We all said somewhere between 73-75 sounds like a pretty decent temp for the office. She feels the office should be below 65 because she gets hot while wearing jackets and sweaters. 

I sit directly underneath the vent and today I just had enough. I suggested that she get a desk fan and that way at 73-75 degrees plus the fan she should be fine. She refused because she "likes the whole room cold". 

I looked her dead in the face and said "we shouldn't have to suffer because your..." as soon as I realized what I was saying I stopped myself. Everyone else gasped because they filled in the blank. But this chick, (we'll call her patty) either didn't get it or pretended to not get it and said "What? Because i'm an Ice Queen?!" "Because I love cold weather?!" then she sat down. 

Everyone scurried back to their desks and pretended like nothing happened. 

Its 62 degrees in here right now. 

 

damn dovo

 i know you got issues but shit

 have you even seen your testes in years? one hypothyroid idiot is keepin all of you guys down? 

edit: please at least tell me she's your boss.

Edited by po_boy_fuuma_hatesbürgerz

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My next door neighbour posted up a note on my door with this creepy ass writing that if it were a font, would be named 'murderer's hand' asking me to stop being so noisy when I enter and leave my apartment. 

 

Now I'm hyper aware of every time my door closes, and I lurk inside if he's out in the hall and I want to go out, avoiding any possible confrontation. 

 

Like this, but less pleasantries: 

WevXLIn.png

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My next door neighbour posted up a note on my door with this creepy ass writing that if it were a font, would be named 'murderer's hand' asking me to stop being so noisy when I enter and leave my apartment. 

 

Now I'm hyper aware of every time my door closes, and I lurk inside if he's out in the hall and I want to go out, avoiding any possible confrontation. 

 

Like this, but less pleasantries: 

WevXLIn.png

 

i do this with my neighbors as well but they're just plain awkward as fuck it isn't even confrontational i'm just not tryna walk out my door and say "hey man what's good" to get a weird/quiet "yeah you too" in return

Edited by uizm

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We have a new intern at the office, he works on the third floor and I work on the first.

I would´t have met him weren´t it for the two times (in the same week) that I opened the bathroom stall door after laying a massive and merciless brick to look directly into his eyes staring at me motionless and waiting for me to be finished so he could use the stall.

It smelled horrible.

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today I finished in the stall and a guy came in and I literally just stood there with my feet slightly hidden behind the little trashcan outside of the stall and waited til he left.

i work on the 2nd floor and went up to the 4th to shit

 

idk why anyone would wait outside of the stall tbh thats kinda weird to me unless u dont got options

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The worst is when somebody sprints in the second you finish deucing, almost brushing shoulders with you as you exit the stall. Its like wait 30 seconds or somethin fam, u dont want to be huffing my poop particles. Some people  :wacko2:

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When you leave the office for the restroom and a few offices down the hall you hear a door open and look back to see it's a guy. It then becomes a silent foot race. Then, you think whether you can walk faster and quickly use the restroom before he arrives or just go to another floor.

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The worst is when somebody sprints in the second you finish deucing, almost brushing shoulders with you as you exit the stall. Its like wait 30 seconds or somethin fam, u dont want to be huffing my poop particles. Some people  :wacko2:

 

haha, i perfected the stealth poop when first dating.

pinch out the log and flush immediately.

 

lol

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who’d have known that it’d be so perfect to deliver a line from alan clarke’s scum in the moment during a game of football.


the opposition gives me a little bit of mouth during a bit of push and shove. i’m up for the banter so i square up to him my head on his nose â€˜right are you gonna have me or what’.


he banters back ‘mate you are having a laugh’ and turns his back to me.


i saunter up to him and i breathe down his neck â€˜right lad, you best know i’m the daddy here’ and two fingers up his arse. well thats the line delivered to a cinematic peach and he falls in a heap. we still shake hands at the end but now you know, this game brings out the best in me. vinnie jones would be proud.


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i'd like to think it was a private moment between us both

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in australia we call it the "hopoate""

 

 

Rugby_377334_2883084.gif

 

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who’d have known that it’d be so perfect to deliver a line from alan clarke’s scum in the moment during a game of football.

the opposition gives me a little bit of mouth during a bit of push and shove. i’m up for the banter so i square up to him my head on his nose â€˜right are you gonna have me or what’.

he banters back ‘mate you are having a laugh’ and turns his back to me.

i saunter up to him and i breathe down his neck â€˜right lad, you best know i’m the daddy here’ and two fingers up his arse. well thats the line delivered to a cinematic peach and he falls in a heap. we still shake hands at the end but now you know, this game brings out the best in me. vinnie jones would be proud.

 

 

but did u kiss

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