Djrajio Dating Thread/Advice Column

[crosswound]

i used to see this female places quite frequently. now i'm wondering if she was making moves and i missed it. tell you the truth after reading this thread from the start i think the same female made more than one move different days/times but i was stuck in la la land.

that aside i love this thread.

[ojjairus]

Mharcl you said you would be back at square 1 if you go out with chick and it didnt work. but would you or would you not be back at square 1 if you didn't go out with her.

[MharcI]

Mharcl you said you would be back at square 1 if you go out with chick and it didnt work. but would you or would you not be back at square 1 if you didn't go out with her.

!! this is true aswell

[ojjairus]

anytime.10char

[roflobster]

scenario: freshman year of college

girl: chinese, honors pre-dent student. virgin. cheated on her bf of 5 months with me. seems to have self-respect issues (she does not randomly hook up with guys)

about a week after i arrived at school we went on a trip to yosemite. one of my friends named Eric introduced me to a girl he had met on the bus ride there. i wasn't that interested in her at the time and i could tell he was, so that was about it. i noticed them flirting a lot while at yosemite.

the next day we return to campus. i see the girl again at a school event that night and we start chilling. the girl was flirting heavily with me and i started flirting back. we eventually walked to a party. me and the girl were walking together a pretty far distance behind the group. we get drunk and after the party we leave and the girl and i make out back at the dorms. i try to escalate past making out but she denied my attempts. i return to my room and receive a text "did you make it back safely? i had fun tonight but we need to talk tomorrow"

the next day we chill and it's kind of awkward. later that night she tells me she has a bf. after two days of hooking up and telling me how much she likes me and how confused she is, she tells me she dumped her bf. we hook up that night and we finally get past making out

when we first started hooking up i didn't want a gf and i could tell she wanted a relationship. but after weeks of hanging out with this girl i feel like i want to be in a relationship with her and i felt like it's where we were heading. we both reveal we are virgins and i tell her i've never had a gf before (this is true. i hook up with a lot of girls but never a gf). her longest relationship was 5 months. she is constantly telling me how she really likes me a lot and i tell her i like her too. during out time hanging out we really start having deep conversations and revealing a lot about our family, our past, etc. she tells me a lot about her ex (the one she cheated on) and how she was the only thing that made him happy and how he was very clingy and desparate.

i send her a few horny drunk texts over the course of these few weeks, one of which really pissed her off. "dtf ok. is your roommate home?" basically after that one text it feels like she completely stopped liking me. she never contacted me and would always have some excuse for why she couldn't chill. about two weeks later she tells me via text "things have changed :/" we talk and she says she doesn't like me anymore, no relationship, etc. i ask her what changed and she says she doesn't know how or why or what changed, but something did. she said she didn't know my motives or what i wanted, so i tell her everything. i spill my heart (as much as you can to a girl you've only known for a month) but she says we should just be friends. i told her how i liked her, how i wanted a relationship with her, i told her why and what i liked about her. she said it is too early for a relationship

so that's where we are at now. just friends. it's not awkward but i want more. i want to keep hooking up with this girl and i wouldn't mind a relationship but i'm pretty sure that;s out of the question. so mainly i want to be fwb. she's really fuckin hot.

i don't have problems getting girls, but i am really stuck on this one. it's not something that normally happens (back home i would be hooking up with 5-6 girls at one time but they didn't know it)

what do i do??????

[Whodinihimself]

^^^ move on.

Fish, the sea is teeming with them.

[roflobster]

i figured somebody would say that but i still wanna hear other options. i think i'm gonna get drunk with her tomorrow night, go to a party, and make a move and see what happens. gonna try to mention that we don't need to be in a relationship to have fun

[arem]

Word. You blew it with this one, but if she's a virgin your chances (or anyone else's FWIW) of just being fuck buddies was almost non-existent anyway. If you're a virgin you probably aren't ready to be FWB with anyone either. That's not a diss, it takes some experience to learn how you deal with sex, and how well you can disassociate being physical with someone with having deeper feelings for them. Not everyone can do it...

Anyway, don't spend time worrying about it. You are a freshman in college, go out and enjoy the plethora of options out there. Tying yourself to one girl in your first month would be a waste anyway.

[redgrail]

lobster>>>

this is the definition of a lost cause.

you will not get a virgin fuck buddy. ever. especially one that you already semi-blew it with. virgins are clingy creatures by nature. it's a relationship or no ship, son.

move on.org

[roflobster]

o well 12345

[po_boy_fuuma_hatesbargerz]

o well 12345

um in general avoid honors students or pre-med/pre-dent students – aside from a few that hook up randomly, most tend to gravitate towards the long-term relationships with other honors students, etc. I know a few who got together freshman year, got into same honors programs, and graduated last year, STILL together.

it's just how it is with that much work and school, you don't put too much effort into effing around, and tend to stick to somebody who's relatively stable.

(also, some pre-med/pre-dent/honors girls are CRAZY WITH CAPITAL C)

[roflobster]

if you're not even exclusive, why are you giving her that whole treatment, saying i like you etc etc?

by you revealing everything and coming back to her, you already lost the upper hand

reference: http://www.superfuture.com/supertalk/showpost.php?p=1938229&postcount=918

- somebody correct me on this if i'm wrong

she started saying it first. for the first two weeks or more i didn't say it. but then one night as we were hooking up she stopped and said "if this is all you want then i need you to tell me. i like you and want more than this and it's not fair if all you want is physical." so i told her. for the next week or two it was like we were in a relationship but not "officially" and then it seemed to stop after i sent her that text i mentioned.

[billy.]

her e-mail was her [email protected]

this is the icon.

femelle what do i do!?!

just getting a bunch of bros and broing out.

looked at limo prices for the night, it's looking like a better idea just to get a room and jam everyone in there.

just got this email.

Hi my name is Bianca,

I searched where to get fake IDs on google and your post on superfuture.com came up. In September of 2008 you wrote:

"i think i got mine on macdougal street?

for like 125 cause it "scans" or whatever bullshit they try to tell you.

it was either that or a state id.

which wont get you anywhere.

apparently some place in asbury park, nj sells em for like 20.

good ones too."

I live about an hour from both places so I was wondering if you had specifics about either of these locations. I'm 18 and really just want to be able to get into clubs and things that my friends get into because they're older than I am. If you could help me I'd really appreciate it.

Thanks,

Bianca

yeah riiiight.

got the feds on me

how do i make sure it's not a fed and hit!?!?!

[azif]

Bitch ain't 18

[po_boy_fuuma_hatesbargerz]

No 18 year old writes "I was wondering if you had specifics about either of these locations.", EVER.

Don't reply, and probably edit that original comment out.

[billy.]

lol im not actually trying to hit.

just jokes.

she's real though.

fb friends now hahahaha.

im gonna pass her to onemancult tho

[djrajio]

what do i do??????

Wow. Firstly I wouldn't have tried for a virgin. There are just too many factors at play that could go against you. But since you are inexperienced as well I think it doubly amplified the situation.

Anyways, first and foremost I'm not mad at you.

Frankly you did all the textbook chump-change behavior that an inexperienced young chump would do in a situation like this.

So don't get down on yourself.

But let this be a lesson to you and I'll highlight some ironic points to hit the point home.

There is one gem in your post that literally spells out EXACTLY what you did wrong:

he was very clingy and desperate

So what do you do?

so i tell her everything. i spill my heart (as much as you can to a girl you've only known for a month) but she says we should just be friends. i told her how i liked her, how i wanted a relationship with her, i told her why and what i liked about her

Frankly you killed the mystery, challenge, and attraction effectively from this point.

Remember guys you can't logically/rationally convince a woman to like you. They respond emotionally. So trying to convince a woman to like you is FUTILE.

But I think the initial moment you killed your opportunity was when you revealed you were a virgin and never had a gf before.

In my experience women want men that are more sexually experienced. They want to feel like you are going to provide them something new and exciting. REMEMBER GUYS, IF YOU DON'T GOT IT, FAKE IT.

Next, you hang out with her and have deep conversations for long periods of time about your past, etc.

GUYS DON'T DO THIS.

Again it kills the mystery and challenge. Think about, suppose you got a present all wrapped up and mysterious and then someone told you ALL THE DETAILS IN THE BOX, would you be more inclined to keep wanting to open the box and figure out what's in inside???

No of course not!

Remember, treat your personality like a mysterious box with many many many layers of wrapping paper. And only through time and intimacy do you slowing unwrap the layers to reveal your past, personality, etc.

Word. You blew it with this one, but if she's a virgin your chances (or anyone else's FWIW) of just being fuck buddies was almost non-existent anyway. If you're a virgin you probably aren't ready to be FWB with anyone either. That's not a diss, it takes some experience to learn how you deal with sex, and how well you can disassociate being physical with someone with having deeper feelings for them. Not everyone can do it...

Hit it right on the nose.

[jeepster]

this thread is really funny.

good reads.

[ojjairus]

reference to the present is gold.

[ojjairus]

this thread is really helpful.

good reads.

fixed 10 ch

[Kev07]

K bumped into a new problem for me last night, this girl thinks Im a player

I just denied it and worked on building comfort which worked well, while I kept being talkative, funny and dipping some hints here and there abut I think in the process I may have gotten friendzoned not sure

what would you do? In my situation and after? Not looking for a pump and dump or I would have just told her I got a new bitch everyday of the week

[DJ_Flame]

IMO if she likes you she'll reciprocate, if not just use her as arm fodder/entry to hot friends...

More fish in the sea concept

[po_boy_fuuma_hatesbargerz]

damn, djraijo is the master.

[phen3N]

this girl asked for my number and when i'm available

but then i forgot to ask for her number

[ojjairus]

^ i think you realized your mistake already.

And are you sure it wasn't to study? or when you say girl do you mean "man"?

[DJ_Flame]

In a club/partyassorted shindig, should I spread out my investments, or go for the one that will generate good dividends?

I think I know the answer is to spread out your assets, then wait and jump at the best revenue opportunity, but sometimes its seems like putting your equity into one or two investments is better since a net profit is almost assured...

So yea how to maximize total owner's capital in this situation???

[Paean]

In a club/partyassorted shindig, should I spread out my investments, or go for the one that will generate good dividends?

I think I know the answer is to spread out your assets, then wait and jump at the best revenue opportunity, but sometimes its seems like putting your equity into one or two investments is better since a net profit is almost assured...

So yea how to maximize total owner's capital in this situation???

A= L+ OE

1)assuming that L remains constant, when OE increases, A increases too.

let A = number of chicks

you'd get more OE( profit) when you get more chicks(A) provided you do not fuck up and increase L

2) however!, having more investments = more risks. so that leads to more chances of you increasing L.

hence, you should still try to refrain from being a cockblocker ( esp to me )

[djrajio]

Efficient Frontier my friends....

[Leeacto]

quote:

originally posted by DJ_Flame

sometimes its seems like putting your equity into one or two investments is better since a net profit is almost assured...

Can you name one case in which this has been true?

Even though I'm totally guilty of it also, I side with diversifying (let's use some real terms here).

Though each girl has her own residual risk, it would be better to diversify and side with the systematic risk, for it is far more likely that an individual asset loses value than the entire portfolio collectively bottoming out.

Now there's always the possibility of incorporating derivatives into single assets if you're going to stick with the "eggs in one basket" idea. You could go long in the asset (just try with one girl), but then buy a put option for a future strike date (if she gets too crazy 3 months from there, cut out no matter what).

Again, no one will invest in just one asset unless they have inside info.

Now if I could just follow my own advice....

[DJ_Flame]

Now if I could just follow my own advice....

Word I sometimes don't practice what I preach...still got residual young chump instincts.