Jobs that you had that are a joke.

[designersheep]

I worked part time as a clerk before (about 10 years ago), and I passed boring hours reading books. I used to read worthless stuff back then, but it's better than nothing.

seraphim, no tips in UK?

[seraphim]

pretty much only in London, I worked in a small town in the north where the way you show your appreciation towards the waitress is by grabbing her arse, then complaining to the manager when she drops hot soup on your crotch.

[DaBestSpoona]

I worked at a couple of skateshops in college, mounting trucks and applying grip tape, watching skate videos all day, and talk to clist celebs like jesse camp, tony danza, bison dele(rip), warner wolf and kennedy.

[zelah]

i work at the gap, i got scheduled for 9 hours this week, they complain that i don't seem to be "on the boat"

[un-]

I worked at a grocery store once...

[kauflust]

i work at the gap, i got scheduled for 9 hours this week, they complain that i don't seem to be "on the boat"

i've never heard that expression before

[zelah]

i believe its closely tied to being "on board" or not

[cuddlysheep]

i worked as security.though the pay wasnt great.probably was one of the funner jobs ive had. messing around with the radio receiver making falls claims of emergency.lol,

[cuddlysheep]

only in portland.

i've never heard that expression before

[mrpenguin354]

Shelving books in the library. Not a bad job, but a lot of downtime for writing papers, listening to music, and reading (it was a library after all).

At least it had air conditioning in the summer.

[macuser3of5]

I couldn't work at kmart. Would grind at my ego to much.

Rent > ego. You will discover this at some point.

[rome1]

^Damn Straight!

[sybaritical]

I worked on a crocodile farm for a while.

It was scary and dangerous.

Not neccesasarily in that order.

[seraphim]

^ is there something better than rep that I can give you for that?

best.job.ever.

[joey_formal]

sybaritical i nominate you for most intense fucking job ever.

[Uinku]

I worked at the video-renting store and was paid $4 dollars an hour. It wasn't very busy there so I just watched movies all of the time. I fucked around with the computer and I found a way how to take money out of the pay desk without anybody ever knowing. So now I got 'paid' $19 dollars an hour. But I quit after two years..

Now I got a job as a designer for a computer-game company, which will probably start this summer!

[will_i_am]

i used to be a waiter at a retirement home.

i basically just had to flirt with old ladies and talk to old men that smelled like whiskey.

...and give them v8.

[spyversusspy]

i don't know if this counts but i work at mcdonald's. i'm gonna quit this summer cuz i'm going to davis for college in the fall. btw the mcdonald's i work at is full of mexicans haha.

[wild style]

As Keri said in another thread second fun jobs should be just that but, when it gets slow, it gets really slow. Usually spraypaint on the dumpster out back for our afternoon art session. Then maybe walk to starbucks and hassle the employees there for a bit, destroying random shit the tool store puts in there dumpster is also amusing. The high point is usually watching someone get pulled over by the police.

Haha, sounds familiar. See you in the morning, buddy!

[Pogi]

Sales rep for an industrial goods branch. Boring and no real challenge.

[airportlobbytx]

Before I went back to school, I temped at the IRS during tax season (the season for romance). I was an "extractor." I opened envelopes as they came in, discarded the envelope, and placed the contents in one of about 12 slots in a desk. That's it. For 12 hours a day, seven days a week. I just shut my brain off and listened to slayer on my iPod. Also, my co-workers were incredibly fat! And they always had "parties," which consisted of potlucks with fried chicken, soda, and supermarket cakes.

As easy as that job was, there were people who couldn't do it. There was a division of handicapped folks who were given the bags of envelopes the "extractors" had finished with and passed each envelope over a light table to be sure a check or W-2 hadn't been left behind. Sad life for those guys. At the end of the tax season, we had a big "party" (i.e., smorgasborg of junk food) and talent show. The folks in the light table room shared some of their talents, which mostly consisted of lip syncing to Britney Spears songs.

Anyway, I came out of that month at the IRS with an exaggerated sense of my own competence and attractiveness.

[jours]

When I was fourteen I moved to Hawaii with my uncle for a year. He owned the corner store but wouldn't hire me because he said I'd steal booze. I did anyways. And I got a job at a pineapple farm. That job was sweeeet. Then I had to move back to Cali. And i got a job at a country club. Good money, shit tips, bitchy old members. And its the second wealthiest club in socal. You'd think they'd tip. Nope. I resigned after I crashed a golf cart after work one time when the beer girl and I got drunk and drove around the course. Luckily, one of my dad's friends is a member and he covered for me because the members are covered. That was my worst job. Now I manage a website that sells off-roading parts, and I am a crossing guard.

Best -> worst -> almost best.

[Sayword]

how do you like being a crossing guard?

[jours]

It is absolutely the best job I've ever had. I get my legs tan, I'm the little kids' hero, it pays 11 an hour for nothing, I get my own stop sign thing and whistle, and I'm pretty much exempt from any traffic violation since I'm technically an employee of the police.

It's 6:30-8:30am, then I go to highschool from 9-12, then I'm back out from 12:30-2:30.

Seriously, It's awesome.

[edwithoutahead]

i used to be a waiter at a retirement home.

i basically just had to flirt with old ladies and talk to old men that smelled like whiskey.

...and give them v8.

Yes! I was a waiter for a retirement home too! It's actually pretty fun.

[joey_formal]

jours you're my hero too.

[rome1]

It is absolutely the best job I've ever had. I get my legs tan, I'm the little kids' hero, it pays 11 an hour for nothing, I get my own stop sign thing and whistle, and I'm pretty much exempt from any traffic violation since I'm technically an employee of the police.

It's 6:30-8:30am, then I go to highschool from 9-12, then I'm back out from 12:30-2:30.

Seriously, It's awesome.

I didn't know that working as a crossing guard got you the same perks as a police officer?

[jours]

I wouldn't say I get the same perks as a cop, but my paycheck comes from the PD. And I've gotten pulled over before and I took out my id, but my crossing guard id came out to, and he asked me where I did my crossing-guarding(?) and we made small talk. The id was issued by the pd when I got my job. I really don't know why I have it, I've never used it for anything, but I can show it to cops. =]

[ouss]

ain't no investment bankers?

[Francis Begbie]

I worked at the video-renting store and was paid $4 dollars an hour. It wasn't very busy there so I just watched movies all of the time. I fucked around with the computer and I found a way how to take money out of the pay desk without anybody ever knowing. So now I got 'paid' $19 dollars an hour. But I quit after two years.. !

I love hearing work schemes like this. Well done.

I work as a lifeguard, getting paid 13 an hour, which is a complete scam in itself. I ordered a Gundam model online, which I intend to build during my considerable downtime. I might delve into Leggos next. Hahah. I'm also going to reread the Odyssey.