Engaged/married? What did you do for rings?

[lyingonyourdriveway]

alright, im getting engaged this summer and wanted to know how some of you engaged/married dudes went about aquiring an engagement ring

What does the ring you picked look like?

How did you pay for it? Cash lump? Payment plan?

Im really fucking excitied but to tell you the truth, i just jumped into this. Marriage has been the plan for months now, when im done school, but engagement this early has only been decided recently.

anything at all you could tell me would be great, im so fucking excited

[M4TM]

step 1 : find girl

step 2 : save ca$h

anyways, what i did was pick out 3 stones that I liked and were in my price range (3 months salary!! ). Then I borrowed a temp ring from the shop to propose. Then we went back to the shop together so my wife could design the ring herself. girls are particular like that. i didn't trust myself with making that kind of choice.

paid cash. i wish i could have done a payment plan... that was the fourth most expensive thing i've ever bought - after an apartment, car, and these uber limited pair of dunks.

she chose a platinum band with a six prong tiffany setting. i got a platinum band - about 8 mm wide - no barrelling (is that a word? i'm trying to say its flat), with a 1 mm groove down the middle. its about 1.5 mm thick.

oh, and congrats!

No Shirt. No Shoes. No Dice.

Learn it. Know it. Live it.

Edited by Music for the Masses on Mar 15, 2006 at 01:40 AM

[lyingonyourdriveway]

thats exactly what i needed to hear, thanks man.

i know what she would want when it comes to metals and stones, but beyond that, that is perfect, having her design her own. Jesus thinking about how expensive it will be is kind of unsettling but it is so fucking worth it

it will make the time between now and graduating so much easier

[minya]

How old are you?

[haptronic]

my girl wont marry me cause she said im too ugly and retarded.

[lyingonyourdriveway]

old enough to get married!

[gunpwdr]

I think the 3 months salary guideline is a good one. One thing you should definitely not do is sell your car to pay for the ring... you'll end up with 6 years worth of shitty cars and she'll never let you get anything resembling your old bachelor ride. But your coming out of school right?

I say don't compromise on quality. Once you've decided on the cut, price will largely be driven by carats, but I think color and clarity make an even bigger difference. Don't go below 1.0... I don't think above 1.5 is necessary. Get her input if you have to. I personally feel the engagement ring should be the first and last you give her, so you should get it right.

I financed the ring... and definitely would finance it again given todays low rates, unless you have lots of disposable income.

[Cue]

i think americans spend more than Europeans ... in the UK 1-2 months is seen as ok, and even my loaded mates only got half carat diamonds ...

[nairb49]

so there is still love out there... attaboy

Personally I dont'really get the 3 month thing. Lets assume a guy makes 50k net income a year, yes, which is above average, but lets just say.

so, he makes about 4k per month, and so the ring is gonna be 12k?

That seems like quite a bit to be spending on a ring for a guy who's making 50k a year, most of the engagement rings i've seen in Birks are quite a bit less than that.

or maybe i'm looking at the wrong rings?

i suppose its always worth it for that "special someone"

congratulations lying, but does she know about your shady past as breakfasteater......

nairb49

[Cue]

well it was all invented by de beers 80 years ago

Victorians never bothered with fancy diamonds

http://www.blacktable.com/bruno031030.htm

[baskew]

Quote:

so there is still love out there... attaboy

Personally I dont'really get the 3 month thing. Lets assume a guy makes 50k net income a year, yes, which is above average, but lets just say.

so, he makes about 4k per month, and so the ring is gonna be 12k?

That seems like quite a bit to be spending on a ring for a guy who's making 50k a year, most of the engagement rings i've seen in Birks are quite a bit less than that.

or maybe i'm looking at the wrong rings?

i suppose its always worth it for that "special someone"

congratulations lying, but does she know about your shady past as breakfasteater......

--- Original message by nairb49 on Mar 15, 2006 06:12 AM

If someone nets 50k after taxes, they'll be ok giving up 12k. Keep in mind you don't have to pay it all at once.

http://www.baskew.com

[rigga]

i got lucky. my girl didn't really care about the ring for either wedding or engagement, so we decided to forego the process. We decided when we actually weren't broke, to get something dope, so we will do it, but i don't know when.

i feel blessed and often quote method man "word life, you don't need a ring to be my wife...."

[rhythmandsound]

whether you're broke or well-off, spending 3 months salary on a ring really seems a stretch. say you make 12 grand a year, are you gonna spend 3 grand on a ring? say you make a hundred, are you gonna shell out 25 grand? it's just a really disproportionate amount of money to be spending on something like that. Maybe one month's salary, but 3 months? not dissing Music, you're a stud, but man...i know my wife and I didn't get anywhere -close- to that, nor did we want to. we were just grad students at the time but it wouldn't have mattered either way...

[regalbear]

i inherited a rock from my mom so I got off light, found a nice place in the jewlery row in toronto and got a custom job for about 1100 in platnium, they set my stone when all was said and done, they even gave me a lender ring to doo the deed with since i was getting a custom.

as for bands went to another jewler that my inlaws knew, and got plain solid platnium bands mine at 1200 hers at 1000, shit lasts and is worth it, tho sizing with platnium is tricky if you find a good place then you should be fine.

and always pay cash, always!

[damnIam]

Lost mine on a coral reef in Key West on the Honeymoon. Divorced now so it doesn't matter.

I think platinum is the best as well. Silver is too cheap and gold is too gaudy for me. Platinum or nice white gold is the ticket.

[lyingonyourdriveway]

platinum is definitely what i will be going after, neither of us like gold

thanks for the all the replies guys, it makes things a little less overwhelming, im just so fucking excited

[d]

I got lucky, my girls mother gave me her grandmothers engagement ring. So...I propsed to my girl with her great grandmothers ring (net value 15K, cost incurred zero)

[arem]

Wife and I skipped the engagement ring thing, too much money that could be better spent, like on the down payment on your house. We did get wedding rings though, we skipped the gold and got titanium bands, looks cool and will wear well over time.

[canice]

haha wow dude you are my age!! congrats. i look forward to meeting this girl, maybe?

[dunkin deeznuts]

this post is worthless with out pics of your girl........

www.wellbred.org

[tootwoot]

so what is a decent size ring to get? 2 carats? 1? In between 1 and 2??

[lyingonyourdriveway]

Quote:

this post is worthless with out pics of your girl........

--- Original message by dunkin deeznuts on Mar 15, 2006 12:26 PM

search

[M4TM]

by the way. don't forget to ask your GF's parents for permission. it's a classy step.

and re: 3 months, i figure if i amortize the cost over the life of the marriage, it averages out to be pretty cheap.

No Shirt. No Shoes. No Dice.

Learn it. Know it. Live it.

[moongirl]

i'm married. have been for maybe 7 years. we got married with some $8 sidewalk sale rings we got in sf.

than a few years ago i bought myself a kathy waterman ring. then my sweetie bought a platinum band.

but to be honest neither of us wear our rings. old or new.

then again we only got married so i could get his dental benefits.

moongirl :: cute stuff for an ugly world

http://www.moongirl.com

[Serge d Nimes]

I had a really hard time finding a stone and an even harder time finding a setting. I finally found a nice stone and lookd for a setting for 3 months till I decided to design my own. I think it turned out pretty nice. It is lost cast, so it is one of a kind. The center sone is 1 ct and it is in brushed 18K white gold.

Carpe Denim! (not the jean brand silly!)

[lyingonyourdriveway]

Quote:

by the way. don't forget to ask your GF's parents for permission. it's a classy step.

and re: 3 months, i figure if i amortize the cost over the life of the marriage, it averages out to be pretty cheap.

--- Original message by Music for the Masses on Mar 15, 2006 08:13 PM

her mom absolutely loves me, but i will ask her anyways, her dad might get an invitation to the wedding

[snugglepony]

no disrespect to anyone's who's dropped some serious cash on a rock for their wife/fiancee, but i've always been kinda anti-diamond... especially due to the quasi-monopoly debeers has on the market, and the seriously fucked-up labor practices of the diamond mines. this is a great read if you have the time:

http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/198202/diamond

that said, if you've got an heirloom ring from your grandma or whatnot, that's classy...

for a wedding band, i've always liked this one:

http://www.twistonline.com/Detail.aspx?ID=332

the half-moon interior and the flat exterior are the opposite of most bands, and i think the inversion is boss. not to mention it looks just like the ring i made for my highschool girlfriend out of a nickel...

[cultpop 0217]

Quote:

no disrespect to anyone's who's dropped some serious cash on a rock for their wife/fiancee, but i've always been kinda anti-diamond... especially due to the quasi-monopoly debeers has on the market, and the seriously fucked-up labor practices of the diamond mines. this is a great read if you have the time:

http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/198202/diamond

that said, if you've got an heirloom ring from your grandma or whatnot, that's classy...

for a wedding band, i've always liked this one:

http://www.twistonline.com/Detail.aspx?ID=332

the half-moon interior and the flat exterior are the opposite of most bands, and i think the inversion is boss. not to mention it looks just like the ring i made for my highschool girlfriend out of a nickel...

--- Original message by snugglepony on Mar 15, 2006 10:16 PM

yeah diamonds are for slavery. fuck de beers.

we in the u.s. are so obsessed with bling but fact of the matter most diamonds were/are mined under horrible working conditions and often times by people who were not free. and the value is set arbitrarily by the diamond industry/monopoly. diamonds have only been in vogue since the beginning of the 20th century. dont believe the hype.

back in 1973 my mom requested an emerald from my father for the very same reasoning.

my girlfriend knows she won't be getting a diamond from me (unless its heirloom or vintage) and i'd much rather her have something unique.

to this day my moms dark green emerald outshines all the other boring rocks i've seen.

i'm not a mod or a rocker. i'm a mocker.

[boystory]

[trd937]

I'm glad to chime in on this subject since I received alot of help from ST'ers on wedding suit ideas. The 3 mos. salary is a tough gauge since everyones budget is different. I suggest paying cash if you can. You can negotiate more on pricing. If you can't, try to get a low interest loan or credit line. Interest sucks!

To simply my process I 1) Got my GF's ring size! Know way I was dropping $$$$ and having to go back and have it resized! 2) set my budget and looked at various loose stones. Know the 4 C's! This will help you so much in pricing. You can go down in Carat but get better clarity. If set right, a smaller carat diamond sparkles way more than a bad clarity dinger! 3) After I got the stone, I had the setting designed for a touch of uniqueness.

Quote: Then I borrowed a temp ring from the shop to propose. Then we went back to the shop together so my wife could design the ring herself. girls are particular like that. i didn't trust myself with making that kind of choice.

^^ This is a great idea. I worried for weeks that she wouldn't like my ring. Thankfully she loved it. But if in doubt M2M's idea is great

Good Luck.

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