Omegle.com - post your conversations

[mpcec]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: Sup son?

Stranger: sup

You: Blood or Crip?

Stranger: hells angels

You: Pagan

Stranger: protestant

You: Hells Angels don't believe in God.

Stranger: hahaha

Stranger: guess i fucked up thetn

You: you're not really HA.

You: I am though.

Stranger: as if a hells angels member would use omegle

Stranger: that would be so shameful

You: April fools.

Stranger: cutting it close on the april fools jokes

Stranger: got 30 min left

Stranger: sufu?

Stranger: do you have stairs in your house?

Who was this!!!

this was me... not even april fools joking you.

[Orion]

That's awesome. 1st SuFu connection.

[Fabulaz]

Stranger: r u a hobbit

You: no

You: i cast level 52 flamethrower

Stranger: oic

You: you burn nigga

Stranger: i put on my robe and wizard hat

You: shit is super effective

Stranger: i lust lvl 8 eroticism

You: yo bitch paladins cant us that

You: fag

You: i use fucking hyper potion

You: gain 200hp

Stranger: my dildwand ejaculates lvl 10 spermination

You: YOU FUCKING RETARD THATS NOT A REAL MOVE

You: wtf man

Stranger: you are inseminated

Stranger: you are fertile

You: i totally haxxored ur mom last night

Stranger: i haxxored you

Stranger: just now

You: i blew my trojans inside ur moms ass

Stranger: your pregnancy test will show up positive

You: now shes gonna have to reformat

You: her uterus

You: fag

Stranger: up yours

You: you rpobably use like lvl 99 suck dick

Stranger: yeah i do

Stranger: does that suprise you?

You: no that just means you are weak against the KKK

You: fucking super effective

You: 4x dmg

Stranger: i use my pokeball

Stranger: and i catch you

You: FUCKING ASSHOLE YOU CANT CATCH A TRAINER

Stranger: i just did

You: fucking close my masterball on ur dick

Stranger: my caterpie used string shot

You: yo do you play counterstrike

Stranger: only if you suck my dick

You: FUCK YOU HOMO

You: ok maybe later though

You: cuz im chill like that

Stranger: i use the pistol

You: but like do you want to play cs or what

Stranger: to masterbate

You: how does that work

Stranger: L

You: your dick fits in the barrel?

Stranger: i stick my penis

Stranger: unfortunately yes

You: yo thats cool man

You: they got this shit on the radio station i listen to for all natural male enhancement

Stranger: the shotgun isnt as

You: you like tupac?

Stranger: close nit

Stranger: i like threepac

You: no threepac is fake

You: they only have thoes in malaysia

You: fucking asshole

You: go play your gay pomkeman

Stranger: fuck my asshole?

You: do you want to?

Stranger: yes

[sawn-off chef]

Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: katya is that you?

You: WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN

You: I'VE BEEN WORREID SICK!

Stranger: LOOKING FOR U

You: i missed you :[

Stranger: WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HAIR?

You: blonde silly

Stranger: fail

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[jordanelias]

You: sufu? jawnz are down this year?

Stranger: i no rite

You: that's what she said!!

Stranger: i no rite

You: there are 2887 users online including me

Stranger: wanna cyber?

You: like

You: cybertalk

You: or cyberfight

Stranger: cybersex

Stranger:

You: or cyber-cybersex?

You: like

You: "i am at my keyboard in clothes. i type that i am naked and shift in my seat"

Stranger: or

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[mpcec]

sometimes i get discouraged when people disconnect and i thought we were having a good convo. =\

[Fabulaz]

sometimes i get discouraged when people disconnect and i thought we were having a good convo. =\

Word

I got one guy talking about monty python and he just left.

[sawn-off chef]

i'm spitting game to some polish physical therapist from florida pale and 22, YES. hahah so bored.

[its swanny]

You: hey there

Stranger: yes

Stranger: you are from?

You: united states son

Stranger: Brasil

You: what do you do

Stranger: what their age, and which city speech?

______________________________

Stranger: hi

You: hi

Stranger: girl?

You: supertalker?

Stranger: kkk?

DISCONNECT

_______________________________

You: want to play a game?

Stranger: sure

Stranger: can u tell me ur name first?

You: lexington

DISCONNECT

______________________________

You: what time is it?

Stranger: game time

You: hell yes chicago bulls

Stranger: FUCK BASKET BALL

Stranger: BOOM!

_______________________________

You: BOOM GOES THE DYNAMITE!

Stranger: Hey

Stranger: Where?!

You: on the internetz

Stranger: Oh shit

Stranger: I better go then!

_______________________________

You: hi

You: FIRST! WOO! I WIN!!!

Stranger: congrats

Stranger: im 12

Stranger: how but u?

You: i'm chris hansen

Stranger: Why dont you have a seat?

You: LOL LOL LOL

______________________________

[mpcec]

You: heeeeeeeeey

Stranger: howdy

You: finally an american

You: haha

You: everyone on here is from brasil

Stranger: i know, i got about 3 brazilians

You: where you from?

Stranger: UG

Stranger: does your daddy like to rock and roll

You: what does it even mean to ask that

Stranger: if he rocks out to some N*sync

Stranger: JC, Justin and and the boyz

You: man, you have got to have one of the shittiest senses of humor ive come across

You: in a while

You: like

You: is that the best you got?

Stranger: maybe :-(

You: damn dude

You: step your fucking game up

You have disconnected.

[owl]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: we todd ed

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

or send us feedback.

[Jimbo69]

i talked to a guy about band of outsiders s/s09

[jordanelias]

WHO ARE YOU

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: sufu? jawnz are down this year?

Stranger: shyea

Stranger: jawnz man not the way they be used to

You: what jawnz do you most like to kop?

You: BLAST

You: you don't know rick owens do ya

Stranger: blast you aint got jawns?

You: i got me some jawnz

You: need to sell some jawnz to kop more jawnz though

You: its jawn-selling season

You: need me some margiela

You: dig?

Stranger: yea foo jawnz is the business right now

You: man

Stranger: you hustlin like husalah?

You: jawnz ALWAYS the business

You: naw man

You: im too lazy for hustlin

Stranger: how you sellin jawnz then

You: always 'need to'

You: never get round to it usually

Stranger: what you let those jawnz just pile up

You: sadly man

You: yeah.

Stranger: nah thats not the way for no jawnz

You: I KNOW

You: got some helmut to sell

You: some johann

Stranger: man johann?

You: can't believe i have something by b.son

You: all gotta go

You: johann, the fancy j. lindeberg stuff

Stranger: wholesale that shit to some messicans

You: should hustle it to fashion forums

You: can probably get $80 or more per item

Stranger: nah those peeps dont be known bout jawnz

You: how you hustle?

You: waaaa

You: those peeps know all bout jawnz

Stranger: nah they say they do but they is fakes

You: they jawn jawnz

You: nah way

You: freal? how you know

Stranger: man some inside shit ya know

You: naw man

You: not yet

Stranger: got a jawnzer he be knowin

Stranger: trust man

You: shiiiiiiiii

You: but messicans?

Stranger: messicans eat it up

You: they be two borders away!

You: how i get to messicans

You: unless we talk amerimessicans?

Stranger: nah messicans dont go to em, they come to you

Stranger: say you got some passports and jawnz em

You: what is the best place to attract messicans

Stranger: any just say you got work

You: so how do i sell jawnz then if they need be workin

Stranger: shiiii

Stranger: didn't think about that

You: yeah man

Stranger: fuck

Stranger: i lost my game

You: we figure this jawnz bizzy out

You: market jawnz to beezies

You: beezies buy for their boys

Stranger: yea yea that shit goes around in a loop

You: yeah man

Stranger: like a never ending cycle

You: like a slinky on an escalator

You: always a revolution

Stranger: there you go makes hella cents

You: revolutionary

You: my game aint bout cents

You: thatmakes no sense

Stranger: oh man

You: sall about dimes and dollas

You: factors of ten are the best

Stranger: yea there you go

Stranger: stack that shit up

You: plan to

Stranger: what you gonna do tho

You: be all exponentsin n shit

Stranger: with it

You: iunno man

Stranger: more jawnz

You: i think if i stack that shit up

You: yeah man

You: more jawnz

You: u like jawnz?

Stranger: jawnz yea man all kinds

Stranger: except the hella colorful ones

Stranger: you like colorful jawnz

You: man

You: i did

You: then i didnt at all

Stranger: aw man

You: now i am getting some plain colorful jawnz

You: like red jawnz for the bottom

You: but only like a white jawn on top

You: simple jawnzin

Stranger: oh yea fa sho

Stranger: black and white tho is good

You: grey top notch

Stranger: greys like the baby of black and white so its alrite

You: maybe a neckjawnz with burgundy/gold a bit. set

You: mediates and meditates the two

You: grey is top jawn shit

Stranger: yeah? is that wat them beezies be after these days

You: think so

You: i be wearing some geller jawnz and looks mad fine

Stranger: keep yo hustle on man, about to roll a purple spliff

Stranger: c ya cuz

[OMEGA JELLY JIGGLE]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: *A young woman is showering, the door to her apartment has been left unlocked*

You: sufu?

You: I enter through the back door of the house

You: I creep quietly through the hallway to the bathroom

You: the door doesn't make a sound as I open it

You: can she hear me?

Stranger: *is singing in the shower*

You: opens the shower curtain

Stranger: *turns, shocked* "who the hell are you?"

You: I don't answer

You: I put my hand over her mouth

Stranger: *suddenly strugges, flailing her arms at him, slippin*

You: I catch her before she falls

You: picks her up commando style and takes her to the bed

Stranger: *tries to punch him*

Stranger: *screams into his hand*

You: "how do you like it?"

Stranger: *looks confused shaking her head*

You: "you know you want it"

You: I start to fondle her breasts

Stranger: *tries to squirm away, her face turning red*

Stranger: *her tiny nipples become hard*

You: gently restrains* I pull her towel off completely and start to play with her pussy

Stranger: *lets out a the feintest of moans, but covers it up by screaming, feeling ashamed*

You: I WHIP MY HUGE CLITORIS OUT AND FUCK YOU IN THE ASSHOLE. APRIL FOOLS GG

[OMEGA JELLY JIGGLE]

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

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Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

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[bangbangbang]

someone's tormented by denim:

You: do you wear jeans?

Stranger: not you again!!!!

You: ?

Stranger: leave me alone!!!!

You: who are you

You: why does the world hate me soooooo!

Stranger: who are you!!!! and why wont you leave me alone!!!

[onemancult]

Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: cookies.

Stranger: hi my name is billy. do you like heidegger?

You: no, i prefer nietszche

Stranger: thats retarded

You: why

Stranger: heidegger is the best

You: they both influenced national socialism

You: yeah, heidegger is great and all but

Stranger: he wrote being and time and he was really smart

Stranger: and he was a nazi

You: i prefer my philosophers a little more gothy

Stranger: but it's cool because he was so smart

You: and heidegger is kind of too optimistic

Stranger: no no no

You: yeah yeah yeah

Stranger: you're not interpreting it correctly

You: heidegger is for people who think the world is fundamentally good

Stranger: no see that's a misinterpretation of his essential thesis

You: people who love sunshine and bratwurst and killing jews.

You: i prefer darkness and bratwurst.

You: and killing jews.

Stranger: if you read being and time you'd understand

You: ok, non-german philosopher you love

You: go.

Stranger: only heidegger

You: thats really one-sided dude

Stranger: no i'm pretty smart i'm probably right

You: did you graduate college.

You: are you that smart?

Stranger: yeah i graduate from a very good school

You: where

Stranger: guess

You: pomona community college.

Stranger: i'll give you a hint its in the northeast\

You: oh ok

Stranger: and they teach about heidegger

You: borough of manhattan community college

Stranger: and it begins with the same letter as heidegger

Stranger: as in H

You: is it also near a really shitty city overrun with drunk irish people

Stranger: it starts with H

Stranger: yeah thats the one

You: awesome

You: you must be really smart

Stranger: yeah i am, that's why you should reaqd heidegger

Stranger: you'll get smart like him

Stranger: but not too smart so you dont have friends

You: you have friends?

Stranger: yeah lots of friends

Stranger: my girlfriend broke up with me though

You: do they all read heidegger?

You: your exgirlfriend must be a cunt that doesnt read heidegger

Stranger: some of them. but i know the most

Stranger: no i love her stop it

You: well she broke up with you

You: what are you going to do about it

Stranger: i dont know stop asking

You: are you sensitive about it

You: i apologize

Stranger: no i have no feelings

Stranger: have you seen watchmen?

You: yes

Stranger: you know dr. manhattan?

You: yes

Stranger: i'm like him but without the big revelation at the end

You: maybe thats why your girlfriend left you

Stranger: no she made me like this

Stranger: before i was more like rorschach

Stranger: no i'm just kidding i never had feelings

Stranger: are you a girl?

Stranger: will you date me?

Stranger: will you?

Stranger: are you there?

Stranger: come back i don't want to be alone

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[gfunkdocta]

You: state your sex

You: or else

Stranger: creeper much?

Stranger: male

Stranger: disconnect eh?

You: homosexual?

You: men dont say

You: creeper much

Stranger: not really

You: u have older sister?

Stranger: yes

You: that's why

Stranger: probably actually

You: you're a girl

Stranger: and my ex

You: ha

You: ur ex..

You: u wanna be like ur ex?

You: a weak girl

You: that gets fucked

You: by guys?

Stranger: no...

You: u ever think of josh harnett's butthole?

Stranger: WHOA!

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[artificialsky]

i feel like in the future all conversations (IRL and internet) will be like omegle conversations.

[Tyro1]

THE POWER OF THE INTERNET!!!

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: im horny

You: cool

Stranger: want to watch me cum?

You: not really

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[m1sterko]

a rude welcome:

Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: ...........................„„„„„„„„_.............. .................................................. ............

..................../``` /:::::::::::```~,.................................. ....................................

................../:::,/```'''''''''''````-- ,:::\.........._________________.................. ..........

..................|::/ • • • • • • • • •|::: ......../......................................\........... ................

...................\| • •„„„_ - -_„„„ •|::/......./.............GTFO………...|.................___...

...................-|• • •õ-`|: ‘ -õ• •|:/|....../...._________________/.........._-~`` • • • \..

...................|;| • • • / • \ • • • | ;/__/..../..............................., ---~`` • ` • • • • , /..

...................`-| • • • ¯ ¯ • • • •|`_____/............................../` • • • • • •_•,•-````'.....

......................\ • •`¯¯¯¯` •,,- |,..................................../ • • • • • • /_,,__,,.........

........................`\ • • ¯• • /-` / ``~-,.............___........../ • •'~,,,_• `• • • •`|• •\........

.........................| •-¯¯¯ • /::::::::::::`/``¯/¯::::::::\......./• • • •• • • •\ /• • • |• • | \......

.....................,` •/¯¯\`~,/::::::::::::::/::::/::::/¯¯¯¯`-,_,| • • • • • • • |• • • •/• • •|•/......

................-~`:: • /::::::\•/::::::::::::::/::/``::::::::::::::::::/ `-_¯¯``~`¯ /`• • / • • / /.......

....._..-~`/::::::: •/:::::::/::::::::::::::/:::::::::::::::::::::::/:\ • •`-,,--,__/,__/,_, / '.........

.../::::::::/::::::::/::::::::/:::::::::::::/:::::::::\:::::::::::::::::\• •• •``~-~--~ ’..................

..|:::::::: ::::::::: :::::::/:::::::::::::/::::::::::::\:::::::::::: ::::::\ • • • • • /......................

./:\::::::: ::::::::: ::::::/::::::::::::/:::::::::::::::\:::::::::::::\::::::¯¯~~¯|........ .............

[Tyro1]

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: oi

Stranger: oi

Stranger: macaco

Stranger: torce pro vasco eh?

You: tu monge ma catto de la mu goot to

Stranger: -,-'

Stranger: vai falar ingles na pqp

You: seva ma trungy mongey?

Stranger: brazil

Stranger: fdp

You: Brasil?

Stranger: aham

You: oinky lunchey munchey?

Stranger: si si cralu

Stranger: buceta

You: hamun chezey lonchey?

[Hella Hyphy]

You: yo i fucking love omlettes

Stranger: dido

Stranger: omlettes with cheese

You: omlettes with salmon

You: omlettes with bacon

Stranger: bacon is for fags

You: what you some kinda jew

Stranger: no i'm a cannibal nigga

Stranger: omlettes with flesh nigga

You: fuck you putting cheese in an omlette for

You: if u a cannibal

Stranger: ass cheese nigga

You: cannibals don't fuc with cheese

You: unless it was made with titty mil

You: milk

Stranger: i eat titties nigga

You: HUMAN TITTLE MILK

Stranger: tittle?

You: no u don't don't lie on the internet

You: tittle = tits = ?

Stranger: why not?

You: its illegal

Stranger: says who?

You: against the internet code of regulations

Stranger: i break rules nigga

You: you need to get your read on nigga

Stranger: you illiterate mutha fucka

You: you snake ass

You: rat ass

Stranger: you wide nose havin mutha fucka

You: snitching ass

Stranger: you black magic, evil mutha fucka

You: playin in dirt looking boy

Stranger: don't chase no skirts lookin boy

You: THATS THE SMELL OF CLEAN

You: DON'T PASS OUT LOOKIN BOY

Stranger: ass to mouth lookin boy

You: from down south lookin boy

Stranger: eat omlettes with trout lookin boy

You: didn't never work out lookin boy

You: was i just talking to you about omlettes?

Stranger: ya you confused ass nigga

[OMEGA JELLY JIGGLE]

Stranger: This is Debbie from Omegle customer support, we have had recent complaints of abuse of this website by your IP address. Your address is currently logged and we will be reporting you to the appropriate authorities.

We have reason to believe you are grooming minors in an attempt to solicit indecent pictures and/or video of them. The FBI have been alerted and should contact you within 24 hours. If you fail to receive this call then a warrant for your arrest will be immediately posted nationwide. Thank you.

[phen3N]

I felt like being a douche so the first thing i said was "brb." the dumb guy on the other end actually waited for a good 5 min or so. then I said "okay i'm back" and disconnected

[AstroWolf]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: sup

You: yo

You: this is funny

Stranger: yeah this is a funny word

Stranger: this lol

Stranger: -.-

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[jeepster]

omc, he was talking about Hofstra probably.

not a very good school q_p

[jordanelias]

i bet that motherfucker doesn't even know how circumspection works

[crissyw]

You: sufu?

Stranger: what?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

.

[its swanny]

i got pedo bear'd.