Masturbation Saved My Life!!!

[Aku]

back in the day (ages 14 through 16) i used to be a casual masturbater. probably masturbated around 5-12 times a week (give or take if my parents were up later than 11pm or not). but anyways, on the transition from age 16-17 and looking at how my life was going (lack of self confidence) and how i didn't have a girlfriend yet i decided to take matters into my own hands. i decided that public masturbation would give me the confidence to talk to people because nothing says "look at me, i'm fucking confident" like pulling out my magic stick and rubbing hot gravy loose onto some perunials while 2 old asian ladies watch in shock and arousal. ever since then, i rub one out quick (with enough practice, i can do it in a quick 26.43 seconds or a good few hours, just depends which way you rub really). this has really improved my sex life (i masturbate atleast 3-8 times a day now) and even though i don't have a girlfriend, i don't really care cause after a good release,carpe diem's next fall line is more important to me than women.

[shagnscoob]

so im not the only one....

[hotboyx2]

fap fap fap fap fap

[silence_kid]

back in the day (ages 14 through 16) i used to be a casual masturbater. probably masturbated around 5-12 times a week (give or take if my parents were up later than 11pm or not). but anyways, on the transition from age 16-17 and looking at how my life was going (lack of self confidence) and how i didn't have a girlfriend yet i decided to take matters into my own hands. i decided that public masturbation would give me the confidence to talk to people because nothing says "look at me, i'm fucking confident" like pulling out my magic stick and rubbing hot gravy loose onto some perunials while 2 old asian ladies watch in shock and arousal. ever since then, i rub one out quick (with enough practice, i can do it in a quick 26.43 seconds or a good few hours, just depends which way you rub really). this has really improved my sex life (i masturbate atleast 3-8 times a day now) and even though i don't have a girlfriend, i don't really care cause after a good release,carpe diem's next fall line is more important to me than women.

dude, if you did it that much your skin would be peeling right off

[po_boy_fuuma_hatesbargerz]

pix o gtfo

[mrchariybrown]

youtube vidz o gtfo

fixed (10)

[Mihalis]

epic

but remind me not to buy anything from you if you post in supermarket, stains aren't in this season

[stadsvandringar]

The point of this thread is what now?

I do like that it is in superculture though.

[comaeternal]

If it were not for masterbation I would have ended up in a life of crime

[Hella Hyphy]

back in the day (ages 14 through 16) i used to be a casual masturbater. probably masturbated around 5-12 times a week (give or take if my parents were up later than 11pm or not). but anyways, on the transition from age 16-17 and looking at how my life was going (lack of self confidence) and how i didn't have a girlfriend yet i decided to take matters into my own hands. i decided that public masturbation would give me the confidence to talk to people because nothing says "look at me, i'm fucking confident" like pulling out my magic stick and rubbing hot gravy loose onto some perunials while 2 old asian ladies watch in shock and arousal. ever since then, i rub one out quick (with enough practice, i can do it in a quick 26.43 seconds or a good few hours, just depends which way you rub really). this has really improved my sex life (i masturbate atleast 3-8 times a day now) and even though i don't have a girlfriend, i don't really care cause after a good release, carpe diem's next fall line is more important to me than women.

this put your thread over the top.

[roflobster]

;')

what a heart warming story

[Aku]

i just felt like i can come open to you guys. it's as if i'm never judged here. thanks for listening to my story.

[Pandemonium]

masturbation ruined me i can't look at women the same anymore.

[fattybfat]

is that how the crotch area faded on denim?

did you say 3-8 times a day? or a week seriously?

[brohymn]

back in the day (ages 14 through 16) i used to be a casual masturbater. probably masturbated around 5-12 times a week (give or take if my parents were up later than 11pm or not). but anyways, on the transition from age 16-17 and looking at how my life was going (lack of self confidence) and how i didn't have a girlfriend yet i decided to take matters into my own hands. i decided that public masturbation would give me the confidence to talk to people because nothing says "look at me, i'm fucking confident" like pulling out my magic stick and rubbing hot gravy loose onto some perunials while 2 old asian ladies watch in shock and arousal. ever since then, i rub one out quick (with enough practice, i can do it in a quick 26.43 seconds or a good few hours, just depends which way you rub really). this has really improved my sex life (i masturbate atleast 3-8 times a day now) and even though i don't have a girlfriend, i don't really care cause after a good release,carpe diem's next fall line is more important to me than women.

pix o gtfo

[ken shinoda]

Years ago when sex wasn't talked about much (and even to this day some people don't believe in masturbation and feel it's evil and lustful) someone would say, "If you do that, you'll go blind" simply to scare the person and have them stop what they were doing. Masturbation is normal and relief system for most men and some women, but if it interferes with your life and you're making it your major entertainment then you need to get a life.

- From your concerned fellow member of the Superfuture big family.

[dibadiba]

I have a problem. I was masturbating earlier, and I thought it would feel great to have something slowly pumping into my ass. The only thing I had lying around was a broom. The broom had a plastic handle, so I lubed it up and slowly started to slide it up into my ass. I started to slowly pump my cock and tried to slide the broom deeper into me, but I couldn't get it very far because it kept hitting the floor and if I bent over it was really uncomfortable, so I did what anyone would have done. I grabbed a chair and pulled it over to the refrigerator and climbed on top. I hung my legs over the refrigerator and let the broom hang down between them and began to slowly pump it up and down into me as I jerked off. But then I heard someone coming down the hall towards the kitchen, so I jumped off the top of the refrigerator. That's when it happened. Before my feet hit the ground, the broom hit the ground first. The handle shot through my intestines and out the top of my head. I could hear someone trying to open the kitchen door so I yelled out "Just a minute!" and began to waddle over to the computer. I put a bowl on my head to cover the broom handle sticking out of my skull, but I'm afraid my parents are going to notice the bristles sticking out of my ass. What can I do. I need your halp.

[nictan]

I have a problem. I was masturbating earlier, and I thought it would feel great to have something slowly pumping into my ass. The only thing I had lying around was a broom. The broom had a plastic handle, so I lubed it up and slowly started to slide it up into my ass. I started to slowly pump my cock and tried to slide the broom deeper into me, but I couldn't get it very far because it kept hitting the floor and if I bent over it was really uncomfortable, so I did what anyone would have done. I grabbed a chair and pulled it over to the refrigerator and climbed on top. I hung my legs over the refrigerator and let the broom hang down between them and began to slowly pump it up and down into me as I jerked off. But then I heard someone coming down the hall towards the kitchen, so I jumped off the top of the refrigerator. That's when it happened. Before my feet hit the ground, the broom hit the ground first. The handle shot through my intestines and out the top of my head. I could hear someone trying to open the kitchen door so I yelled out "Just a minute!" and began to waddle over to the computer. I put a bowl on my head to cover the broom handle sticking out of my skull, but I'm afraid my parents are going to notice the bristles sticking out of my ass. What can I do. I need your halp.

HAHAHAHAHHAHA i laughed out loud at this. made my day hahah

[Aku]

pix o gtfo

[Lel]

I have a problem. I was masturbating earlier, and I thought it would feel great to have something slowly pumping into my ass. The only thing I had lying around was a broom. The broom had a plastic handle, so I lubed it up and slowly started to slide it up into my ass. I started to slowly pump my cock and tried to slide the broom deeper into me, but I couldn't get it very far because it kept hitting the floor and if I bent over it was really uncomfortable, so I did what anyone would have done. I grabbed a chair and pulled it over to the refrigerator and climbed on top.

I stopped reading after this.

[Charlie Delta]

You missed the best part!

(posting in retarded threak)

[Unwashed]

HaHaha rofllmao @ dibadiba

first i was like

then i

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[pirsig]

During my teens I experimented with many mastrubatation aids. These incluced fruits- usually variations of melon, inside of toilet rolls and wearing rubber gloves.

[Guest shuka]

dis u?!!

During my teens I experimented with many mastrubatation aids. These incluced fruits- usually variations of melon, inside of toilet rolls and wearing rubber gloves.

arent you afraid of dropping that shit by accident and crushing your testicles?

[Aku]

^ you took this thread to a nother level. like some dbz parallel dimension shiz

[kyo]

During my teens I experimented with many mastrubatation aids. These incluced fruits- usually variations of melon, inside of toilet rolls and wearing rubber gloves.

It fit inside a toilet roll? I pity you.

[Unwashed]

It fit inside a toilet roll? I pity you.

i guess we aren't all centaurs

[Aku]

I have the upper body of a centaur and the lower body of a human.

[curtis89]

and now im all hot and bothered.

[spunkey]

http://www.seizureandy.com/stuff/guts.html

read that and you will never look at masturbation the same(not for weak stomachs)