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denimdestroyedmylife

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I just started doing squats and I love it. I'm still a scrawny fuck, but at least there's some definition now instead of just skin and bones. Feels great.

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Mharcl, if you're contemplating Suicide, you are either taking too many pills or drinking too much alcohol. Nothing in life is that bad where you have to take your own life.Get over yourself, and grow up. I have to go to jail for a while pretty soon,(up to 2 years) and this aint nowhere near an option. The only time i thought i wanted to die I was on Xanax tripping. I'm from Aruba, and have had a WAY WORSE life than 99.9 percent of Superfuture. (probably the whole 100 %) Not only where we poor, but my mom was 16 when she had me. She didnt have the patience to raise a kid being one herself. She would whoop my @$$ for any LITTLE thing I did. (not spank, whoop me like a grown person, with hands) I had to do all the chores in my house, from my room, Living room, kitchen, bathrooms, trash duty, yardwork, wash dishes, wash ALL clothes, dry clothes, fold clothes, and put them where they belong. Back to being broke, one year I got a 12 pack of Brisk Iced Tea for Christmas (favorite drink at the time.) Been kicked out of every school in my life damn near. Basically all I'm saying is that We have all had it rough, Pain should make you a bigger and better man, not break you down. If you feel like dying you are way too emotional. This aint even a 100th of my story, too many bad things went on in my life, I Just keep on Gunnin'

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Yeah Mharcl, pretty much what everyone else said.

We all have times were things aren't appearing to get better. I actually just went through that. And I found that no one can really help you but YOURSELF. I mean you can go to counseling, call hotlines, tell friends, tell random dudes on the internet but everything these people do or tell you arent going to do shit until you decide you want a change. That will just take some growing up and you have a ton of life ahead of you.

And like alot of people have been saying, get up and start doing things. I started working out, working more, doing small projects, reading and a host of other random shit and it really helps take your mind off of things and it also helps to find out a little more about yourself. Life is going to have its ups and downs but thats all apart of life man. Suicide should never be an option. And I know that things seem to be in the shit right now (and like Clopek said, only you really know what youre personally going through) but things will get better if you allow them too.

Good luck man, don't give up. I hope things turn around for you and that everything works out.

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i really hope mharcl didn't kill himself

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Look guys, I completely understand what you are saying

no you don't. You just spent 4 paragraphs feeling sorry for yourself. I'm telling you, do you really think you're the only person who has problems and feels sad in this world, and therefore is entitled to talk about them like this? Get the fuck out of here. Stop looking in the mirror and expecting yourself to be so special, just calm the fuck down and live like a human being. You have plenty of time.

I'm about to turn 30 soon, and dude, everything you're saying, I know how it feels. I've been there and I've had far worse times as well. I am not gonna spell out my own problems here because that doesn't really do anything for them, but you need to realize that you are completely and utterly normal, just stay off the bottle because you are permanently fucking up your serotonin levels and then you really will have problems, rather than the tiny ones you have now. Get off the fucking internet while you're at it, go outside and try to make some friends.

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no you don't. You just spent 4 paragraphs feeling sorry for yourself. I'm telling you, do you really think you're the only person who has problems and feels sad in this world, and therefore is entitled to talk about them like this? Get the fuck out of here. Stop looking in the mirror and expecting yourself to be so special, just calm the fuck down and live like a human being. You have plenty of time.

I'm about to turn 30 soon, and dude, everything you're saying, I know how it feels. I've been there and I've had far worse times as well. I am not gonna spell out my own problems here because that doesn't really do anything for them, but you need to realize that you are completely and utterly normal, just stay off the bottle because you are permanently fucking up your serotonin levels and then you really will have problems, rather than the tiny ones you have now. Get off the fucking internet while you're at it, go outside and try to make some friends.

Like theres nothing else I want to fucking do then sit home between the tv and computer all day, you say it like its so easy, go outside and make some friends. WIll do.

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Mharcl it's just not worth it to commit suicide. Don't take the easy route, you're still young and I'm sure things will look up soon. We all go through with what you're feeling and it's best to just try to stray away from those negative thoughts. Start off small, you say you just want to watch tv and be on the computer all day, go to a coffee shop with free wifi and lurk on your computer there. Making the trip to the coffee shop, communicating with the baristas, and being around those who look like they're working can be motivation in taking bigger steps to fulfill your needs and creating ideas to keep you busy.

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Like theres nothing else I want to fucking do then sit home between the tv and computer all day, you say it like its so easy, go outside and make some friends. WIll do.

It is man, I was just in new York for like what, 4 days? I made like 5 new friends without trying. Get on your Facebook, see what people are doing, buy an eighth and call some people up, I dunno man, seems mote productive than drinking whiskey alone and feeling sad.

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The moment can feel like a long time.

The best formula about suicide i have heard is: When a persons coping mechanisms are outweighed by the pain they feel.

We have all been there.

One thing i keep telling myself recently, is that being unhappy or depressed is a normal thing. My ex from collage, who now has kids and a house and a white picket fence, her and her husband both still laugh they have suicidal thoughts... its part of life, for some of us at least. we have to deal with it. I deal with it. Others deal with it, its something we HAVE to deal with.

Drinking does not help, but man, it helps.

Drugs do not help, but man, they help.

Sex helps.

I want to believe exercise helps, but i am preoccupied with booze, drugs, pussy, work.

Sometiemes when i feel low, i think of people who became what they dreamed. I think that Tim Fucking Alan got busted for coke and became a hero to the fools. I think of the movie Out Cast and believe you never know what tomorrow will bring. I think. I do not act.

As Tom Landry once said: the difference between winning and losing is getting up one more time than you fall down.

As Winston Churchill said: success is moving from failure to failure with a sense of grace and humor.

Wake up buddy, time to go to work.

End of rant concept.

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Start lifting weights. You can take some of that aggression and frustration out on heavy inert objects. It'll boost serotonin levels. You'll also meet people at the gym.

The easiest thing to do in the world, though...go for a walk. When you're starting to feel really down, instead of popping open a bottle of whiskey, strap on your brand new pair of New Balances and take a stroll. Who cares if it's hot. Explore your immediate neighborhood. See if there are any parks or trails nearby. Find a random shop and walk in. You live in Queens, right? Jump on a subway and head into Manhattan. Wander around, explore, find new things, try random new food. Going for a walk is really easy, can be a great distraction, and can reveal new things. If anything, you'll get a little exercise, boosting those serotonin levels again.

I'm not a big proponent of religion, but do you attend a church? If so, see if they have any activities that members your age are doing and see if you can join in.

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Jump on a subway and head into Manhattan. Wander around, explore, find new things, try random new food. Going for a walk is really easy, can be a great distraction, and can reveal new things. If anything, you'll get a little exercise, boosting those serotonin levels again.

I grew up in Queens, from what I've seen around me growing up, its pretty easy here to get depressed, gain weight, and become a shut in. There is nothing to do, no cool things to see/do really, and its hard to make friends here(unless you're Filipino, somehow they all know each other) when there arent that many venues for people to congregate. He's got to move the fuck out, even if he struggles his life will become more interesting.

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I grew up in Queens, from what I've seen around me growing up, its pretty easy here to get depressed, gain weight, and become a shut in. There is nothing to do, no cool things to see/do really, and its hard to make friends here(unless you're Filipino, somehow they all know each other) when there arent that many venues for people to congregate. He's got to move the fuck out, even if he struggles his life will become more interesting.

applies to a lot of places though, you can live in a city with a lot of stuff but never see it because it's not in your neighborhood and so you feel uninvited... if you want to see shut-in and depressed, go to LA and go up the SGV, now that shit is depressing.

On the upside, you can live in Queens, you got a lot of new cheap food that seems to be good lately, you can ride the train and go see stuff and it's really not that far- 99% of the rest of the country doesn't even have that much.

Dude is complaining that he 1) broke up with gf (that has been giving him problems and that he has posted about for like a year on styleforum) 2) lost his job (what kind of job are you doing at age 19 that is gonna make you so depressed if you lose it? You're not running Microsoft here) 3) he has a 'problem' with alcoholism because he's spent 2 weeks on a bender and he thinks he's suicidal now.

On the other hand, if dude really does think these are srs problems, I do worry what will happen when he really does have a legitimate problem in life...

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re: veganism - the majority of my friends are vegan (i'm not) and you wouldn't even know unless you brought it up. i think they get a bad rep. also, the patches on april 77 jeans are never leather because partouche is vegan.

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I was vegan when I was 16 but two weeks on a family holiday in the south of France where all I could find to eat was couscous salad put an end to that. Vegetarianism is a whole lot better - lasted almost a decade with that one and have just had a vegetarian week actually (the result of a meat-heavy trip to Munich!).

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I was vegetarian for the first 20 years of my life. My parents brought me up that way. While it wasn't really that hard, I wouldn't go back. Discovered the joys of meat. But I can understand and appreciate the choice.

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My girlfriend dumped me. I'm sad.

As a result, I havent' changed into my suit for work, and am seeing clients in jeans and a t-shirt.

COME AT ME BRO.

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I tried to commit suicide several times when I was younger but physical pain pretty much sucks and I hated getting hurt (physically/emotionally). If I knew about overdosing on sleeping pills back then...

re: veganism - the majority of my friends are vegan (i'm not) and you wouldn't even know unless you brought it up. i think they get a bad rep. also, the patches on april 77 jeans are never leather because partouche is vegan.
Those damn jeans also call me an asshole! Can't be a bad boy it says.

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I don't care if someone's a vegan or not. it's their choice and they're missing out. also, more cows for me.

but one thing that confuses me is when people call themselves "vegans" when they drink alcohol products that aren't vegan-friendly (most are made with animal byproducts).

this is fine in my circles of friends since all the vegans I know are straight-edge.

but one time a friend brought out of her friends to hang out with us. we were drinking and she mentioned she was vegan. I would've let it slide but it was the way she told me she was vegan. my nachos came out (covered in cheese and chicken). I offered her some and she said "ew, that's gross. I don't want any of that. I'm VEGAN." too bad she had to sound like a cunt because she was cute.

time to be an asshole. most beers these days are actually vegan-friendly. but I lucked out. she was drinking the ONLY beer on tap that wasn't vegan.

so I said "hey, must be nice that most beers are vegan-friendly, right?"

sounding like she didn't know that some weren't, she said "oh, yeah.. definitely"

then I said "so.. how is that troegs mad elf?"

"awesome, you got it too?"

"yeah. I love the cherries. but my favorite is the HONEY."

eyes wide open, put her cup down, and ran to the bathroom and puked.

short version - I don't care if someone's vegan. but I like making hot bitchy girls feel like shit.

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lol @ queens or parts of LA being shitty though.

sometimes I feel like a lot of you guys forget that not everyone lives in these major cities.

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For real, I've been subletting a place in bed-stuy from a sufu user and I'm always surprised at how people are like 'Wow, way out there?' when it's like a few minutes from New York City (manhattan i guess). New York City. There are a lot of people who have to drive 40 minutes to a good mall.

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anyone who rejects honey is my enemy

And the enemy of my enemy is my friend...hello friend.

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I don't care if someone's a vegan or not. it's their choice and they're missing out. also, more cows for me.

but one thing that confuses me is when people call themselves "vegans" when they drink alcohol products that aren't vegan-friendly (most are made with animal byproducts).

i think the mistake is turning a diet into an identity. vegetarians and vegans should be a bit more willing to bend rules. if the goal is to reduce animal suffering, 100% of the population going veg for half their meals (where they'd normally have meat) is the same as 50% of the population going fully veg.

i've had friends who are ashamed to try fish and when they do they get shit from their friends/co-workers. both sides seem kinda silly to me for making a big deal out of it.

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I wouldnt consider Queens a major city, yes and no. Yes its part of NYC 5 boros, but unless you're in areas 15-30 minutes from Manhattan (Astoria, Jackson Heights, Woodside,some parts of Forrest Hills), you got to drive like 20-30 minutes to get a gallon of milk, shop in big box stores like Target Greatland, cant get anywhere without a car, even drive to a subway station.

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not sure what parts of Queens ur talking about but bodegas be every where and got all that u need!

unless you talking LI / Queens border.....

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