how man 5 year old kids could you take in a fight?

[zehero]

i can't imagine a 40lb kid being able to inflict a fatal would or a K.O. allowing for stomptodeaths. the fight would be reduced to luck. ie. you trip, fall, and get eye gouged and stomped to death.

lets make the stakes a little bit larger

the arena is a large metropolis, say manhattan or tokyo. its you versus ten thousand murderous 5yearolds. they're hunting you, you're hunting them. how long does it take you to dispatch them all, one by one, or until they bring you down like hyena's bringing down a wildebeast?

[projectdenim]

With 5 year olds, the possibility of rendering them unable to fight by punching them in the face is pretty high. They'll get KO'd and if they don't, they'll probably start crying because of the pain.

That saying, punching at a weird angle on the same surface (most likely with my dominant hand) will start to hurt really soon especially if I'm going for KO's. I might get 20-25 good hits before the pain is unbearable. If I can afford to wear the approriate L'Maltieri glove/armwarmer shits, I might last a little longer.

Even in tight ass jawnz, I can run pretty fast so I'd hunt down the fatties or stragglers and pick them off one by one. I might even be able to save my fists for bigger crowds by piledriving/suplexing/drop-kicking/power-bombing the unfortunate ones.

I'm gonna say 40 although that website told me 31.

[mellowbonsai]

as long as youre standing up, they cant do much damage. only thing to worry about is when one of them is smart enough to kick you in the crotch, then its game over

you'd fall to your knees, clutching your injured genitalia as the rising tide of five year olds engulf you

it seems like a rather horrific way to go out, i mean, you'd be completely buried in tiny, flailing limbs and biting teeth

[projectdenim]

Now I really want to powerbomb a 5 year old.

.. I have a sudden urge to visit my cousins.

[rome1]

do we get weapons??? shit with a baseball bat I coult def kill a lot of those lil fuckers. prolly 70 or so. depends on how enraged they are; if theve taken their meds or not? riddilin makes a difference! I could distract some of them with yoohoo and oreos or something???

[mellowbonsai]

what if this terrifying scenario came to fruition?

one day a gang of five year olds will ambush me on the streets, dashing into the street from the alleys and hopping out of bushes!

i would want to be prepared, at least mentally

[Gouf]

the survey told me 26, but honestly i could probably fight wave after wave for a good 5-7 minutes. Im positive a single strike from me be it fist, elbow, or knee would be an instant KO for each kid. Kicks would probably take 2-3 out at a time.. so i find it hard to believe i couldnt tkae out atleast 50 easy

[Gouf]

^youre forgetting about mid-air drop kicks which is something I would use in the first few moments of the fight... but I don't see any advantage to tackling/throwing kids as that would probably use up a lot of energy fast, though a good ram or two could take out a handful at a time im sure

[so-so]

just fucking sprint at them high kneeing the whole way closelining on both sides.

I'd love to see a 5 year old try to stop me if I'm running straight at them at a good clip.

[Icarus]

I would probably be taken down instantly.

[selbsttatig]

Probably something like forty at the most.

Doing anything like swinging them around or throwing them would get tiring really fast.

[Interceptor]

what if this terrifying scenario came to fruition?

one day a gang of five year olds will ambush me on the streets, dashing into the street from the alleys and hopping out of bushes!

i would want to be prepared, at least mentally

If you are indeed facing a gang or even a "hive" of five year olds, I assume they'd have a leader of some sort, the biggest most mentally developed...

Dispatch the leader in violent fashion (Thai clinch + knee to the face) or humiliate him in some way in front of his peers. Then you'd have a mob of stickup kids at your disposal.

This discussion brings Ender's Game to mind. Imagine fighting a group of toddler super geniuses.

[corned beef]

I would probably be taken down instantly.

they'd just swing at your shins since that's as high as the kids would be compared to you

[mellowbonsai]

yeah icarus youre like what 8'10"

[projectdenim]

If you are indeed facing a gang or even a "hive" of five year olds, I assume they'd have a leader of some sort, the biggest most mentally developed...

Dispatch the leader in violent fashion (Thai clinch + knee to the face) or humiliate him in some way in front of his peers. Then you'd have a mob of stickup kids at your disposal.

This discussion brings Ender's Game to mind. Imagine fighting a group of toddler super geniuses.

You'd have to be a midget if you needed to Thai clinch a 5 year old. ):

.. Or an asian woman.

[sleazie ninja number 47]

Swing-kick, you couldn't take out more than 2 at a time. Push-kick, maybe more. And that's assuming you have room to kick, and can effectively kick that low to the ground.

Analog, this is the most active I've seen you in a single thread since the epic "Best Nose Hair Trimmer" thread of late 2007.

I could destroy 125 5-year-old orthodox jews no problem.

[DüM]

a noob had a good question, where were these 5 year olds raised? or is it a sample of kids from all over?

site says I can take 26. I've wrestled with 3-4 kids before (no pedo) and they can weigh you down, but then again I wasn't out to kill them either.

[Liberation1945]

i think it'd be pretty effective if you grabbed one of em and swung him around as a weapon...this kid would be FUCKED up by the end of this though...

[Interceptor]

a noob had a good question, where were these 5 year olds raised? or is it a sample of kids from all over?

Yea fuck..

10 brown-brown sniffin West African child soldiers > 100 West Virginian inbred bumpkins.

[sungrak]

1 haymaker, 1 kill easy. i got a good 50 in me.

are these kids normal too? cuz if you had an army of kids with downs syndrome,

that would suck. suckers are relentless

[pavlova cakesworth]

i think it'd be pretty effective if you grabbed one of em and swung him around as a weapon...this kid would be FUCKED up by the end of this though...

isn't that kind of the point?

[Charlie Delta]

Thread reminds me of Zombies.

Carry on!

edit: 25...

[Lexy]

Yeah. Lots. If we're talking avg 5 year olds, an open-handed whack would be enough to make them start crying... and that's really just going to make you want to kick more ass.

The angrier the sufu'er gets, the stronger s/he gets!

[Charlie Delta]

All of you braggin' about how many you can kick senseless, take the test and we'll see who's the though guy then...

[ghostdeini]

this is ridiculous - my friend and I were talking about this yesterday.. how people make this topic in forums and then we decided that we could probably beat up a good amount of 5 year olds before we succumbed to exhaustion

[percy]

i believe exhaustion would be the factor in how long you lasted. that and how effectively you took each one out.

the key would be to keep distance from the pack, use one as a shield with one hand and circle using low kicks to break legs. maybe then dispatch them with chops to neck or palm strikes. no punches cos you will only damage your fingers.

er.. hypothetically anyway...

[DüM]

keeping away would probably work pretty well. I can run pretty fast, I imagine I could get away and make multipe rushes through the pack to take out a good amount of them. I'd get tired a lot quicker though.

[Spastic_Koala]

My cardio is pretty good, so I think I could outlast the exhaustion aspect. Or at least last for a good amount of time. I guess in the end it depends on how energized I'm feeling and how psycho the 5 year olds are.

[khoiphan92]

maybe half

[mr fluffernutter]

The internet says I can take 27. That's a whole classroom of children.