Random Thoughts...

[mrip]

fuckin 4.3 magnitude earthquake while i was taking a dump

[Bona Drag]

is that a metaphor?

[samsikle]

lol everyone seriously just shit up facebook status about the earthquake. it wasn't even all that serious. i was just laying in bed and my bed starts rattling

[NatseOklim]

A friend of mine was in NY when he felt the ground rumble, he looked up at all the tall buildings and started running as he was worried about glass falling. He ran until he got to Central Park, where he called me and asked if I'd felt the earthquake. I slowly explained to him that he'd been feeling the subway beneath him.....

[mr fluffernutter]

i didnt feel any earthquake

[Bona Drag]

lol everyone seriously just shit up facebook status about the earthquake. it wasn't even all that serious. i was just laying in bed and my bed starts rattling

/dirtyjoke

[gfunkdocta]

[mr fluffernutter]

6yNoezhDy7M

[mrchariybrown]

I got a call back for 3rd round interview for an internship!!! :)

[bouwnt]

Imagine a room full of women. Nubile, blonde, wet with desire, Schwartz. A harem,

if you will. Me in leather. A harness, if you like. I am the object of this desire, and all eyes are on me

as I speak. “Ladies,†I begin. “I am the love god, Eros. I intoxicate you.

My spunk is to you manna from heaven...

[cman]

vince, my man, how could you...

ShamWow Guy In Slap, Chop Bust

TV pitchman battered hooker in South Beach hotel room brawl

MARCH 27--Meet Vince Shlomi. He's probably better known to you as the ShamWow Guy, the ubiquitous television pitchman who has been phenomenally successful peddling absorbent towels and food choppers. Shlomi, 44, was arrested last month on a felony battery charge following a violent confrontation with a prostitute in his South Beach hotel room. According to an arrest affidavit, Shlomi met Sasha Harris, 26, at a Miami Beach nightclub on February 7 and subsequently retired with her to his $750 room at the lavish Setai hotel. Shlomi told cops he paid Harris about $1000 in cash after she "propositioned him for straight sex." Shlomi said that when he kissed Harris, she suddenly "bit his tongue and would not let go." Shlomi then punched Harris several times until she released his tongue. The affidavit, a copy of which you'll find here, notes that during the 4 AM fight Harris sustained facial fractures and lacerations all over her face (she is pictured here in mug shots snapped following busts in 2008 and 2005). After freeing his tongue, a bleeding Shlomi ran to the Setai lobby, where security summoned cops. Harris refused to cooperate with officers, who recovered $930 from her purse. "Both parties had a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage emitting from their persons," police reported. In a brief telephone interview, Harris declined to answer TSG questions about her run-in with Shlomi, though she did say she is considering a lawsuit against the pitchman. Asked if she worked as a hooker, Harris declined comment. As seen in the below mug shot, Shlomi was also injured during the fracas and, court records show, was treated at Mount Sinai Medical Center. While Shlomi and Harris were both arrested for felony aggravated battery, prosecutors this month declined to file formal charges against the combatants. Police records list Shlomi's occupation as "Marketing," but make no mention of his affiliation with the ShamWow or the Slap Chop, both of which sell for $19.95 (plus shipping and handling).

p.s. - he looks like 20 years older in that mugshot. what an ugly motherfucker.

[skiniks]

you think that's bad... you should see her!

[Bona Drag]

zep lll is like the most slept on record EVAR

[Elysium]

[skiniks]

that's a good one kodiak, real great.

[Bona Drag]

POLlTIX

U HURD DA WORD

BUT WHAT DOES lT MEAN

YOUNG PEOPLE B EARING 'POLlTlX' AND B TUNlNG OUT

l WlSH SUM1 TOLD ME DAT B4 I HAD DEEZ FUCKlN MASSlVE LETTERS MADE

[Elysium]

yeah, skiniks, it really fits in on this page

[samsikle]

i hate trying to take naps when my parents are home. they're always yelling, but they're not arguing at all. it just seems that they're incapable of controlling their vocal cords and or assume that the other party cannot hear them.

[nicotine]

my senses of smell and taste are quickly fading as i continue to smoke cigarettes as much as i do. food isn't as good as it once was but i will probably not quit smoking until i die. just sayin'

[evisu 2000]

food is overrated anyway

[nicotine]

yeah, I guess so.

[16steps]

i saw larry king at barney in beverly hills sporting a green flannel, red suspenders, a washed pair of diors and new balances. excellence

[gfunkdocta]

food is soo soo good..

cut down! u only get one tongue.

[nicotine]

but the only thing in this world that I love is smoking cigarettes

and that's not going to change for a LONG ass time.

food just keeps getting more expensive and tasting the same as everything else unless it has LOTS of salt or is really spicy.

[pieiskewl]

word gfunk. i live to eat. not eat to live. no fatty though. blessed with a good metabolism.

[nicotine]

there's food in your username hahah

[mrip]

[e0d9n0b5]

that owl cam is the shit

[pieiskewl]

there's food in your username hahah

ha I know. just made cookies today too. i'm dreading the day my metabolism slows down, because I'll have to start actually watching what I eat.

[Ichigo100%]

I'm thinking if I should drop this username and make a completely new account..