doin hood thangs

[Guest jmatsu]

bought auethentic chinaman sesame seed oil from this chinatown hood for the purpose of frying some fuckin noodles. didn't get to eat fuckin noodles cause i used all that shit to analize this one bitch this one time (cause i didn't have no ky/proper lube). after that shit, everytime bitch sat down on my couch, the leather smelled like sesame 4 like a goddamn week (that why i kicked her out). that be ghetto, but is that some hood shit? ....or just MacGyver shit?

[tac0tron]

bought auethentic chinaman sesame seed oil from this chinatown hood for the purpose of frying some fuckin noodles. didn't get to eat fuckin noodles cause i used all that shit to analize this one bitch this one time (cause i didn't have no ky/proper lube). after that shit, everytime bitch sat down on my couch, the leather smelled like sesame 4 like a goddamn week (that why i kicked her out). that be ghetto, but is that some hood shit? ....or just MacGyver shit?

Fuck Jmatsu... I wish I was you.

[tac0tron]

bought auethentic chinaman sesame seed oil from this chinatown hood for the purpose of frying some fuckin noodles. didn't get to eat fuckin noodles cause i used all that shit to analize this one bitch this one time (cause i didn't have no ky/proper lube). after that shit, everytime bitch sat down on my couch, the leather smelled like sesame 4 like a goddamn week (that why i kicked her out). that be ghetto, but is that some hood shit? ....or just MacGyver shit?

Fuck Jmatsu... I wish I was you.

[nickthechibi]

mrchariybrown, how the fuck did you kick down a door and stomp on a kids face when you were 6. nevertheless, fucking hood

I once gave a Bruce Lee neck-kick to a puerto rican dude at my middle school after school after a ching chong joke lol

[nickthechibi]

mrchariybrown, how the fuck did you kick down a door and stomp on a kids face when you were 6. nevertheless, fucking hood

I once gave a Bruce Lee neck-kick to a puerto rican dude at my middle school after school after a ching chong joke lol

[NESK]

kicked a pregnant girl in the face once from the hood of a car when her and her crew of 8+ 15 year olds tried to jack me for my cell phone when i was walking home from work. i wasnt gonna hit the girls but they were tryin to hold me down while their mans went through my pockets. i just kicked anyone in reaching distance and they all scattered. they got my hat so i called some friends and had them meet me, we found the dude with my hat but he ran, dropping his hat in the process. so he got my hat, and i got his plus i kicked his baby momma in the grillpiece = i win.

[NESK]

kicked a pregnant girl in the face once from the hood of a car when her and her crew of 8+ 15 year olds tried to jack me for my cell phone when i was walking home from work. i wasnt gonna hit the girls but they were tryin to hold me down while their mans went through my pockets. i just kicked anyone in reaching distance and they all scattered. they got my hat so i called some friends and had them meet me, we found the dude with my hat but he ran, dropping his hat in the process. so he got my hat, and i got his plus i kicked his baby momma in the grillpiece = i win.

[mrchariybrown]

mrchariybrown, how the fuck did you kick down a door and stomp on a kids face when you were 6. nevertheless, fucking hood

he ran in, slammed the door, and didn't lock it, thinking I wasn't going to just bust into someone else's house.. he thought wrong

kicked a pregnant girl in the face

if kicking a pregger in the face isn't hood, I don't know what is

[mrchariybrown]

mrchariybrown, how the fuck did you kick down a door and stomp on a kids face when you were 6. nevertheless, fucking hood

he ran in, slammed the door, and didn't lock it, thinking I wasn't going to just bust into someone else's house.. he thought wrong

kicked a pregnant girl in the face

if kicking a pregger in the face isn't hood, I don't know what is

[__Nicholas]

umm last "hood thang" i did was pick up a key of clean with my buddy who deals herbs. pretty much every friend that i have from my home town deals, so everytime i am in my hometown its all about selling and picking up.. when i'm not skateboarding, which i got arrested for last weekend, so i guess thats now a "hood thang". six months probation for riding my fuckin skateboard down a public street?!?! sorry for venting....

[__Nicholas]

umm last "hood thang" i did was pick up a key of clean with my buddy who deals herbs. pretty much every friend that i have from my home town deals, so everytime i am in my hometown its all about selling and picking up.. when i'm not skateboarding, which i got arrested for last weekend, so i guess thats now a "hood thang". six months probation for riding my fuckin skateboard down a public street?!?! sorry for venting....

[Bona Drag]

x-post from blurber; the hood part is at the end

one of the more surreal nights ive had recently

i get back from the gym, grab a shower and am getting ready for bed when my dude calls and tells me he's got some ladies in town

i call in to work and leave a message saying i'm cashing in my half comp day that i'd been saving up

we go to a brass show, it's dope, we're drinking, etc.

i meet a 30ish doctor dude who lives in nola one week a month and nyc the rest

he thinks he knows me and then says he may have an in at the britney spears after party

so i'm like fuck yes

the ladies are like fuck yes

my dude and his friend are like fuck no cause they think it means they won't get laid

i'm like n!gg@ plz you can fuck a college bitch any night of the week, how often do you get to go to a fucking britney spears after party?

turns out its bust - shocker

ladies get tired cause they've been drinking hard four nights in a row

they roll home

dudes are like thanks for fucking us over

i'm like get the fuck out of my face with that shit

so they leave

i roll with doctor dude [ll] and find out he knows the owner of the corniest college bar in town

we go for some free drinks and try and creep on some undergrads

mad sketch

i'm too old to be doing that, and this dude is older than me

bust

he lives downtown, so we roll there and decide to try a strip club

they're all closed

so we go to this bar he knows where he says all the strippers go after work

bust

we meet this other young doctor dude in town for a medical convention

we're chillin, first doctor dude rolls home

so me and new doctor go to the one strip club that's open

sketchy and depressing

he leaves, i chill for a minute

stripper says she knows mickey rourke and sean penn

who knows, maybe its true

i go to get a cab cause the suns coming and i have to be in the office by like 1

i run into new doctor on the street again and he is in the process of trying to buy coke from a fucking crackhead

we go to a mcdonalds to negotiate

this is maybe the worst idea i've ever been involved with, and i want to say so but crackhead's sitting right there and he'll flip the fuck out

also, i'm drunk

so instead of trying to extricate myself from the situation...i kick in $5

doctor and crackhead leave mcdonalds and disappear around the corner

other crackhead sitting outside mcdonalds asks me for a cigarette and says we just got hustled

and i'm like no shit

but then i think maybe i should try and find dude just to make sure he's alright

other crackhead says he knows where they probably went

i go look

no dice

i really hope doctor dude is still alive

just another tuesday in new orleans

[Bigyen]

I take music and put a Donk on it...

[Mr Waffles]

the time i robbed this cat in 7th grade with a compass son, sharp points, how many degrees for your life dun? how many degrees for some cheeseburger money? run that!

best post in here. had to bump it. "how many degrees for your life dun?" lulz

[juliaN.]

talked a distant cousin of mine who has resorted to turning tricks these days into letting me hit. actually wasn't so much talked into, more like gentle coercion. mother's side, so based on chinese rules it is safe (no incest concept)

[Bona Drag]

that's more like doin country thangs...

[ProfMonnitoff]

the hood thing about that isnt that you coerced her but that its your cousin

dont matter what chinese rules say, chinese are a pretty hood race anyways, dudes eat dogs.

[juliaN.]

yeah i have always wanted to eat dog

i hear the koreans are pretty good at doing a kimchee tofu soup variation w/ dog meat, that sounds like the better way than the steamed chinese dog.

[Bona Drag]

the hood thing about that isnt that you coerced her but that its your cousin

dont matter what chinese rules say, chinese are a pretty hood race anyways, dudes eat dogs.

and can hustle better than anybody

[juliaN.]

nah but it's not a smooth type of hustle

it relies on sheer bullying force in the event the hustled don't cooperate

chinese, as it is, are also in general not the smoothest talkers. No zoot suits and brown leather blazers with purple turtlenecks round these parts.

[ProfMonnitoff]

i want a dog hot dog

[evisu 2000]

ftb fucked his cousin?

yo....

[evisu 2000]

that shit either answers or raises many questions

that's some fucked up shit

julian you dutty

[evisu 2000]

shit is NOT hood

[evisu 2000]

yo i've never heard of no chinese rules that said it was alright to fuck your cousin

[Guest jmatsu]

talked a distant cousin of mine who has resorted to turning tricks these days into letting me hit. actually wasn't so much talked into, more like gentle coercion. mother's side, so based on chinese rules it is safe (no incest concept)

maybe i have been 2 westernized, cause i couldn't fuck my own cousin.

for what it's worth/in your defense, it is not against the law to even couple with or wed your 1st cousins in most asian countries and many american states.

how was it? did you feel dirty? was it the taboo factor that actually got you off?

[Bona Drag]

also, lost in the shuffle is the fact that she's now turning tricks

i'd get a hi5 screen real soon if i were you

[DaBestSpoona]

talked a distant cousin of mine who has resorted to turning tricks these days into letting me hit. actually wasn't so much talked into, more like gentle coercion. mother's side, so based on chinese rules it is safe (no incest concept)

"hows about 50 bucks"

[skiniks]

man that ain't hood.... that's on some nasty ass inbred tip

[cuddlysheep]

lmaof............

man that ain't hood.... that's on some nasty ass inbred tip