SUPERwoman

[marie]

Maybe if he had hid a dildo in the bouquet this would have never happened

NOW YOU KNOW

[operationjake]

the real question he's asking is "can buying flowers stop my girlfriend from leaving me for someone with a bigger penis" and the answer to that question is rarely yes.

dude, you should have seen the flowers i bought her.

[bouwnt]

well, it all comes down to the little card. wut did you write on the card???

[broneck]

dude, you should have seen the flowers i bought her.

maybe YOU should've seen the other guys dick

[operationjake]

didn't need to. he quit the JV basketball team because people made fun of him in the locker rooms during showers.

and bouwnt, i delivered em in person. didn't need a card. maybe that's where i went wrong...

[Wolves]

here's a question: do girls ACTUALLY appreciate random acts of kindness?

i bought my last girlfriend flowers outta the blue one weekend and she broke up with me the following tuesday because she was digging some dude more than me (she could have at least waited a week... haha). i was not sad or mad but just utterly bewildered. the girl was cwazy but i tried to be really nice to her... i saw exactly how that ended up. haha.

Sounds like a bitch move on her part. You should kill her and make it seem like the other guy did it.

+profit.

[dismalfuture]

I've had more luck with women by just insulting them a lot. (0) Fuck buying girls stuff.

[insidertrading]

is it okay for a girl to jizz on a guy's chest on the first date?

YES

no. I don't like squirters that much. I probably wouldn't call them back.

fuck that.

squirt = win

[landho]

I've had more luck with women by just insulting them a lot. (0) Fuck buying girls stuff.

Truth. Usually, an act of kindness is judged relative to your normal behavior. If you're normally a nice guy, each act of kindness is lost amidst a sea of kind acts and every bad thing you do stands out. (This happened to a friend of mine, who kept buying bigger and bigger teddy bears on anniversaries and Valentine's Days until he ended up buying one those of giganto ones that cost a few hundred dollars. His then-girlfriend broke up with him not too long after this, which was just as well, as he couldn't really go much higher on the teddy-bear ladder.) On the other hand, if you're a prick (albeit a charming one), each box of Russell Stover chocolates will seem like an embarrassment of riches.

Also, if you don't care what other people think, you will find that other people will try to curry your favor. Funny how that happens.

[lestat]

degrading sexual behaviors like jizzing on a girl's body

Jizzing on a girl's body is degrading? then where am i gonna jizz on when i nut? i cant jizz in her Va jay jay...

[Guest Phrost]

then where am i gonna jizz on when i nut? i cant jizz in her Va jay jay...

tell that to the daddy-less kids on maury

[lestat]

tell that to the daddy-less kids on maury

im not black

[Mr Calvin Oscar]

I've had more luck with women by just insulting them a lot. (0) Fuck buying girls stuff.

seriously. girls like it when they feel like lesser beings.

(5)

[Guest Phrost]

im not black

accidents can and will happen

123456789 months later ........ (heaven forbid)

[timber]

I like guys that are hard to get. Like shy, or difficult or generally not very open with their affection.

Random acts of kindness are really sweet though. As long as they're not really constant -- it sort of seems like it means more if it's less often. I know guys that shower their girlfriends with gifts and it'd make me feel awkward if it was happening to me. Not unappreciative, but still awkward.

[Guest Phrost]

I like guys that are hard to get.

i like bobby flay, i like MEN

this challenging enough for ya?

[timber]

this challenging enough for ya?

Man, he says that a lot irl too about how much he likes Bobby Flay.

I gotta take a hint!

[Lab]

im on campus right now. and i am really starting to hate cwg

so gross. nasty lotion residue.

while im eating.

god.

[bernt]

Bobby Flay is the man. He straight up crushes people's dreams on Throwdown.

[jl3969]

wtf bobby flay never wins when im watching!

[who8mahrice]

maybe YOU should've seen the other guys dick

Best line I have heard on SuFu so far. (0)

[dolly]

well, it all comes down to the little card. wut did you write on the card???

last time clopek bought me flowers, the little card had a picture of a guy in a doghouse, and his thoughtful message was, "LOL" with an arrow pointing to him.

i liked it.

[midnight]

My my. You internet couples these days.

[jayrock]

asking girls for advice on how to treat girls is fucking stupid. bitches don't know what they want.

it's all about the emotional rollercoaster

[darkanimal]

I'm meeting some bitches later... should I shower or not?

[jayrock]

nah son

keep those pheromones roaring

[darkanimal]

Cool you just saved me 5 minutes.

[artificialsky]

Get a butt lift.

yBXTnyQ2Hr8

[iralex]

^^ I would totally get that done in a heartbeat

[djrajio]

^^ never thought of it that way, i just like when the back is curved and legs spread cause it can make a girl with no as seem like she has somethin...

This is true.

Even a girl with no ass when you fuck 'em doggy style and have them arch their back, their ass looks great.

God damn that shit awesome.