The Doctor is in and taking cases.

[albeeeezy]

Hi Dr. Dismal, I think I might have gotten this

Is it contagious? Any known cures?

[dismalfuture]

Well, in truth, I do believe there is a physiogonomical correlation between the combination of nose/digit size and penis size, so if you're on the bigger side of those, you are probably doing pretty well and there is nothing to worry about.

[st_]

dismal, what is your ethnicity?

[dismalfuture]

this thread is not about me, it is about you.

[st_]

ethnic self-hatred!

[dismalfuture]

my country of lineage hasn't gotten around to being good yet. I am sorry, that is my fault.

[Halifamous]

I was on the street today and a poor person touched me.

The poor person was also ugly.

What is the cure for this?

[dismalfuture]

Forgive them, for they are confused and unlucky.

[Halifamous]

But the spot where he touched me smells horrid.

[dismalfuture]

Honestly mate, I'd just be thankful you have your sensory responses. I was sitting at the Doctor's the morning and had to sit across from some lady with a Beetlejuice head with no ears and the caved in facial cavities and she'd even passed it along to her offspring, now there's something to be thankful that you weren't born as.

[Halifamous]

she'd even passed it along to her offspring,

Why with the procreation these people, why.

As a geneticist, this offends me.

That's not true, I rationalize it by saying I'm a scientist. I just think it's ridiculous that clearly non-functional genotypes procreate just because the modern world has ridiculous safety nets to allow basically everyone in a first world country to live.

[dismalfuture]

That is true. Beer is extremely cheap in the West as well.

[Guest jmatsu]

ok here's what i got.

so a business associate's wife asked me to take some perscription meds to tokyo for her so that they could be mailed to her friend (cause i went). at the time when the favor was asked, i wasn't leaving for tokyo just yet, so i asked a co-worker of a close friend to take the meds up and send it from a courier counter in narita. i figured the sooner the meds got to japan and their recipient, the better. in compensation for my friend's co-workers cooperation, i gave the guy like 3 designer tees and paid for drinks one night.

so i get back to america and another week goes by. my biz associate's wife asks me to follow up because apparently the meds haven't been recieved. i get the delivery-nigga's cel and call him up. he says that he forgot the meds and other shit in his hotel in hawaii. i call up lost and found and they can't find shit.

anyway the guy was semi-apologetic (not nearly enough), but isn't really taking responsibility for the fact that the meds are lost. he didn't even fuckin let me know after he forgot them!!! japan like sufu is going down the shitter. he is younger than i, so i wanted to pull rank on his dumbass, but he is apparently a celebrity hairstylist, runs with some important circles, and killing him over the phone might make shit weird for my actual close friend who works with him in the same company and for my own personal biz. should i just get someone to beat him up in tokyo after he's finished work and make it look like a mere gang robbery/assault??

should i call him out and try to make him pay for the perscription meds? i mean they aren't cheap, and the person who needed them can't get them in japland. should i care about ceratin mutual connections and social circles? too me, he is wrong, but i asked him a favor, he said okay, now doesn't wanna accept responsibility.

shit ain't really my fault, but how can i explain to the original parties who i intended to do the favor for? the truth seems like the best policy, but it would seem emabarassing for me to consort with people who could not even carry out such an easy task. do i have to carry the burden of this responsibility? is there some way to save face here? how can i exact my revenge without too many repercussions?

thanks doc.

[samsikle]

that's a bummer jmat you sending it off was in good intentions. i hate unreliable people

[dismalfuture]

As you asked the third party to do you a favor, it's more on you mate, sorry to say. No matter how many hands the goods were to pass through from sender to recipient, the sender just wanted them there and the recipient wanted to receive.

You gave the cat some goodies to grease him up a bit, but I think you'll have to chalk both up to a loss since they were your responsbility and they ended up lost, yeah it sucks but I know.

Additionally you'll just have strike the stylist off your list of reliables as a test failed, and you can provide a little feedback on him as you wish if people are bothered to ask.

Sorry, but it doesn't sound like a great outcome in this one.

[Guest jmatsu]

As you asked the third party to do you a favor, it's more on you mate, sorry to say. No matter how many hands the goods were to pass through from sender to recipient, the sender just wanted them there and the recipient wanted to receive.

You gave the cat some goodies to grease him up a bit, but I think you'll have to chalk both up to a loss since they were your responsbility and they ended up lost, yeah it sucks but I know.

Additionally you'll just have strike the stylist off your list of reliables as a test failed, and you can provide a little feedback on him as you wish if people are bothered to ask.

Sorry, but it doesn't sound like a great outcome in this one.

yeah i figured so.

i should just get this guy's ass kicked. what i am complaining about is the lack of social grace esp from a jap-national in this type of situation. japan is going to the dogs. has been...

[dismalfuture]

Yeah, that is the other factor I was curious about, whether that cat was Japanese. I have noticed that Japanese kids born after say, '85'ish are really dead these days and their reciprocation of manners and sense of responsbility/self-respect just doesn't work like their elders. I just got back today from spending some time with my Japanese friends and these new kids are completely soulless.

[JackPhotography]

what kind of scrips were they? shit i didnt know you rolled like that mats

Im thinking perhaps he took them himself if they were the good kind.

In any case this deserves a physical beat down. That shit just doesn't fly, especially when you went through so much trouble to get them to japan.

seriously, get his ass kicked and if you can get his wallet and charge some serious shit to credit card to reimburse you for the scrips.

[dismalfuture]

You must choose where you wanna be in the big scheme of things jmatsu. You could have someone kick his head in, yeah, but decide what level that would peg you at, also, consider if you ever need him again for anything, despite his unreliability.

You can let him know he fucked up, but I think maintaining the image amongst everyone of being flexible and having the most resources is the best aim.

[destructodisk]

dismal -

I am 18 and have no real obligations at the moment. What would you advise me to do with my time?

[dismalfuture]

Ah, to be young and free. Probably the sweetest dilemma known to man. I could give you the generic 'anything you want' answer, but yeah..

Do what you can, whenever. Just as now, I spent my time seeking pleasure, either new or old. Just keep track of what you're doing so that have you have some sort of accountability for what you were doing, when and where, otherwise your character will cease to exist.

[destructodisk]

My problem with the "do whatever" philosophy is I feel I could possibly sink into a state of complacency with where I'm at right now.

So put yourself in my shoes. What's a *realistic* thing that you would do with your life from this point?

[fndmybetterhalf]

dismal. i have been consistantly gaining about a pound a week for the past couple months... I went from 155 to about 168 now. people tell me i fill in my clothes better but now skinny jeans look ridiculous on me. how do you suggest i lose weight?!

[dismalfuture]

edit - I should say though, destructo, that you want to keep in mind that life's objective is to make it over to the other side of the pool safely, how you choose to do that is entirely up to you, but know that time only gives us one true direction. The hoops and obstacles though, oft times individuals put those up for themselves without realizing it.

[dismalfuture]

Destructo, how about you sit with a notepad and make a clear list of objectives/goals/niceties you'd like to achieve on your own, I'd probably make one column short-term, one long-term, and then a separate column for the purchaseable. Once you do that, it's just a matter of shuffling them into a scheme you can actually carry out.

If your slate is blank, there are plenty of things to do with your time. Just make sure they're worth your time invested in the long term. The good things in life don't come to people, people go to the good things.

[Guest jmatsu]

Yeah, that is the other factor I was curious about, whether that cat was Japanese. I have noticed that Japanese kids born after say, '85'ish are really dead these days and their reciprocation of manners and sense of responsbility/self-respect just doesn't work like their elders. I just got back today from spending some time with my Japanese friends and these new kids are completely soulless.

yeah newer jap-generations are fucked up. no samurai spirit left.

[dismalfuture]

Re: weight loss, it's just simple calorie intake. Replace your fluids with non-caloric drinks, eat less protein/carbs and move to more fiber. Fill yourself on water intake and keep your body heat up before you go thinking you're really hungry.

If you really want to shed pounds fast, scare yourself with a health ultimatum, and ban yourself from one of the 'bad' nutritional components such as sugar, fat, or sodium, or any combination of the three. You will shed weight most quickly if you limit yourself to 0 fat, 0 processed sugar, and 500-1000mg of total sodium intake per day and probably feel better in the process.

Extreme case, do a complete meltdown detox, eating only citrus fruit before noon, whole vegetables and no starches at lunch, and the same at dinner with pure soy protein for sustenance. Fill up the space with water and do that for 3 weeks and see how you feel, it will be magic.

[Guest jmatsu]

what kind of scrips were they? shit i didnt know you rolled like that mats

Im thinking perhaps he took them himself if they were the good kind.

In any case this deserves a physical beat down. That shit just doesn't fly, especially when you went through so much trouble to get them to japan.

seriously, get his ass kicked and if you can get his wallet and charge some serious shit to credit card to reimburse you for the scrips.

i don't know what kind of meds they were. i will probably find out tommorrow after my neck is broken (from apologizing jap-style).

i wanna kill this country-born tokyo residing nigga. probably can't just yet.

did you know that 99% of stores in japland don't check i.d. for credit cards (if you're japanese that is)? my old boss used to let me take and use his cc all the time for biz purchases and pr/entertainment shit.

[dismalfuture]

Japan has about the worst credit card practices in the world, I once bought a gf a Bulgari jawn and it didn't work out so I returned it a day after, and they admitted they don't even charge the cards for 14 days, so they just tore up the sales slip from the day before and put the merchandise back out on the floor.

[dismalfuture]

back to destructo one more time for good measure...

To put a positive spin behind all that, I'd probably reinforce within yourself that no one expects an eighteen year old to have big stacks, so run with that while you can, it changes down the line. Secondly, a good general thing to aim for is to be good at something that you do with your life, and to be admired is to be good at something that everyone wants to be good at, is it not? Logically, for a heterosexual young man, the most important thing you can do is master the game early, come to own it and everything else will work out fine. It would be good satisfaction to steal some older wealthbeast's woman, it puts things back into perspective for everyone as to why we're all here mucking around on earth.

Master your domain. Your choices for domain range from your circle of friends to all serviceable human bodies on earth, or somewhere in between. You gotta choose what level you want to be at, not the level you are comfortable at, that is no fun.

We are not perfect, so don't let that get in your way. I once sat next to Kevin Spacey on a plane, and for a guy who in photograph wouldn't give off the vibes of being a master of his domain, he definitely is and exudes his own character.

At your age, I chose college to be my domain. I tried my best. Was I male body power seller with 100% positive feedback? No, of course not, but I did better than those who were afraid to get their toes wet. When I exhausted my lands, I went elsewhere and aimed for bigger things, namely a women's college. It was a cycle I could have kept continuing and it was satisfying, but as I get older I am ready to keep taking it up a notch and take on new cities. Eventually I might reach a level where I feel I am finished.