Worst Email Forward Ever

[Guest StuckOnStupid]

ex-girlfriend's christian cousin...she sends these things all the fucking time, i actually dont even know why shes in my email list...its always a child waving to his daddy as he boards a harrier jet to irak...or some nonsense about jesus...

anyway...enjoy.

A Baby's Hug

We were the only family with children in the restaurant. I sat Erik in a high chair and noticed everyone was quietly sitting and talking.

Suddenly, Erik squealed with glee and said, "Hi." He pounded his fat baby hands on the high chair tray. His eyes were crinkled in laughter and his mouth was bared in a toothless grin, as he wriggled and giggled with merriment.

I looked around and saw the source of his merriment. It was a man whose pants were baggy with a zipper at half-mast and his toes poked out of would-be shoes. His shirt was dirty and his hair was uncombed and unwashed. His whiskers were too short to be called a beard and his nose was so varicose it looked like a road map. We were too far from him to smell, but I was sure he smelled.

His hands waved and flapped on loose wrists. "Hi there, baby; hi there, big boy. I see ya, buster," the man said to Erik. My husband and I exchanged looks, "What do we do?"

Erik continued to laugh and answer, "Hi."

Everyone in the restaurant noticed and looked at us and then at the man. The old geezer was creating a nuisance with my beautiful baby.

Our meal came and the man began shouting from across the room, "Do ya patty cake? Do you know peek-a-boo? Hey, look, he knows peek-a-boo."

Nobody thought the old man was cute. He was obviously drunk.

My husband and I were embarrassed. We ate in silence; all except for Erik, who was running through his repertoire for the admiring skid-row bum, who in turn, reciprocated with his cute comments.

We finally got through the meal and headed for the door. My husband went to pay the check and told me to meet him in the parking lot. The old man sat poised between me and the door. "Lord, just let me out of here before he speaks to me or Erik," I prayed. As I drew closer to the man, I turned my back trying to sidestep him and avoid any air he might be breathing. As I did, Erik leaned over my arm, reaching with both arms in a baby's "pick-me-up" position. Before I could stop him, Erik had propelled himself from my arms to the man. Suddenly a very old smelly man and a very young baby consummated their love and kinship. Erik in an act of total trust, love, and submission laid his tiny head upon the man's ragged shoulder. The man's eyes closed, and I saw tears hover beneath his lashes. His aged hands full of grime, pain, and hard labor, cradled my baby's bottom and stroked his back. No two beings have ever loved so deeply for so short a time.

I stood awestruck. The old man rocked and cradled Erik in his arms and his eyes opened and set squarely on mine. He said in a firm commanding voice, "You take care of this baby." Somehow I managed, "I will," from a throat that contained a stone. He pried Erik from his chest, lovingly and longingly, as though he were in pain. I received my baby, and the man said, "God bless you, ma'am, you've given me my Christmas gift."

I said nothing more than a muttered thanks. With Erik in my arms, I ran for the car. My husband was wondering why I was crying and holding Erik so tightly, and why I was saying, "My God, my God, forgive me." I had just witnessed Christ's love shown through the innocence of a tiny child who saw no sin, who made no judgment; a child who saw a soul, and a mother who saw a suit of clothes. I was a Christian who was blind, holding a child who was not. I felt it was God asking, "Are you willing to share your son for a moment?" when He shared His for all eternity.

The ragged old man, unwittingly, had reminded me, "To enter the Kingdom of God, we must become as little children."

If this has blessed you, please bless others by sending it on.

Sometimes, it takes a child to remind us of what is really important. We must always remember who we are, where we came from and, most importantly, how we feel about others. The clothes on your back or the car that you drive or the house that you live in does not define you at all; it is how you treat your fellow man that identifies who you are.

This one is a keeper.

"It is better to be liked for the true you, than to be loved for who people think you are......"

what the fuck is wrong with people?

[Tiranis]

That's some deep shit... ehhh...

Fucking hate people who forward me shit like that. Like I don't get enough spam already...

[Bandwagonesque]

I don't mind the inspirational/joke emails. That doesn't mean I read them, as I just delete them. What bothers me the most are the ones that reveal the stupidity of some of my friends and family.

You know... if you don't forward this to 200 people Hotmail will cancel your account. OH NOES! :eek: Or, Bill Gates is giving away his fortune. For every person you email this to you'll get $X in the mail next week!

I wish I could set up an automatic reply option that would forward www.snopes.com to the people who send me that crap.

[aitsuka]

I've got all this porn spam

Forward this 200 people and a pornstar will come? wtf?

[Guest StuckOnStupid]

this is not inspirational. this is fucking retarded.

well..maybe this passage is inspirational. to someone.

Suddenly a very old smelly man and a very young baby consummated their love and kinship.

whaaaaaaa?

[Tarmac]

First of all, let me state I am christian.

But....

I used to work in customer support at a tech company doing e-mail and phone calls. Let me tell you, Christians were the worst, meanest, crabbiest, cheapest, ignorant ass holes we ever got. How can that be? With these stupid ass little club websites, they think the whole fuccin world is against them. :confused: Almost as bad as dog breeders and black men. (Just kidding about the last one, they have a right to be pissed)

We were too far from him to smell, but I was sure he smelled.

^this is prime example christian ass hole BS.

[diewhitegirls]

Wow, nothing like condescending to those less fortunate in some sort of misguided attempt to show tolerance. Didn't Jesus say everyone is the same? If that's the case, this story is no different if you replaced the "smelly old man" with anyone.

I hate stupid people who try to be inspirational. It comes off so forced, it's pathetic.

[wEstSidE]

the only inspiration of any kind i've ever had was from a fucking park bench. had nothing to do with god.

[shinobi2000]

You know they teach us some child psychology in medical school during our pediatric rotation -- a child that is too eager/not afraid to meet strangers is being abused by his or her parents...ha ha ha ha

My sister is the worst offender of these forwards but she sticks to the million and one emails about so and so scam or so and so danger. By far the one that made me question our genetic ties was one she sent about some spider who's **natural habitat** is the underside of airplane toilet seats. They LIVE there and crawl up your butt when you sit there and bite you so the moral of the story is check the toilet for spiders...

[Servo2000]

You know they teach us some child psychology in medical school during our pediatric rotation -- a child that is too eager/not afraid to meet strangers is being abused by his or her parents...ha ha ha ha

Man, I'm going to keep that one in mind.

[mr fluffernutter]

I'm going to use it to insult people's parenting.

[watchman]

that was the lamest shit ever. If a homeless dude ever grabs my baby from my hands some shit is going to go down.