corny girls on yelp

[kiya]

http://www.yelp.com/user_photos?userid=jCaVMVew4YKc_j0XP_r_GA&return_url=%2Fuser_details%3Fuserid%3DjCaVMVew4YKc_j0XP_r_GA&select=bNu-XmTmYoYmsu7z4Jp5Xw

[doctor_doom]

[sushijerk]

look like this and you will end up with a kayg:

Or just be a white dude. Unless she be Korean, then you gotta drive a BMW.

[Vampyrvargfesten]

http://www.yelp.com/user_photos?userid=k8S-LkbwbLaTZCuqkFXbQg&select=jLIXgYlELIIGLhzwrGf3XA

http://www.yelp.com/user_photos?userid=EGNWy10Swu4SEf6-1z6rRQ&select=pLsFrvHFvaYLkBQs0lr0jA

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=DM-xhAHMpMYgUO9cbtcf7g

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=t2ulet6w1MVGcK0r9J66Tw

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=JeQR_ov0Sox_tSg7tF8eaQ

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=vKZ5morVFqn_tVn7m_5Ygw

http://img145.imageshack.us/img145/4600/38673923.jpg

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=ebYpHPQWSKoxlzCPJFsFjA

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=jnFq7SOkOhtVUmK84hgb8w

[Vampyrvargfesten]

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=sjdycl-Ir3WLFkOEbTOqPw

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=jNsPTMmg9EcqY7q2Q-Rm6A

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=s2VqE4AodOSWOT1seoWF9g

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=yISnpP025tqgt6B8aMkSqg

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=0N9Z24YW6kqWVDJHin3dGQ

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=c9PwtsNozIxJ5NDMT5C9qQ

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=2xmhkcC9RHxKKoiydbw-2w

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=ibvH1Y7Rh_tstiWgH0OFTA

[cure]

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=9eKk90OB9wKDacTDyYvFWg

"I had such a great lunch with a new girlfriend. You can never have enough, especially good ones. I like to say that I collect them. I wish we would have hung out long ago. Shana is definitely a sweet and positive girl. She's also super cute and has the best smile! We decided to meet at the mall. Usually that could be dangerous, but this time I used all the gift cards I collected from Christmas.

We found this great place. It was packed at 1 pm - couldn't believe it. Thank goodness the bar area was open right away. I thought I was going to die of starvation. I ordered a scallop truffle thing. I definitely feel like this is what they would serve in heaven. Oh, and I ordered mac and cheese too. I know, bad girl! Couldn't help it and now I am paying the price. Must go to the gym extra hard today! Try this place and go see a movie - movies are right upstairs! Love this mall!

Pictures on my blog..."

[doctor_doom]

this thread changed my life

[suremanok]

corny girls on yelp changed my life?

nah.

[Pavlov's Bell]

Once upon a time some of my friends fell in love and got married.

They then got pregnant and moved to Brooklyn.

The story of life.

A couple times a month aunt Lisa would come over bringing goodies from Caputo's in order to subject the cute little spawn into food comas so that the mamas and papas could get their drink on with her.

Caputo's quality more than justifies its Brooklyn Heights price--- you couldn't find better mozzarella in Italia. The skin is so sweet and each milky bite melts those "how did I end up spending 43 dollars on 4 pounds of groceries?" thoughts away. A very distinctive and fun collection of foodstuffs that will probably make you ooooh and ahhhh. *

...Unfortunately, it turns out that parents are usually more prone to food comas than children.

More booze for me. Wait, who am I kidding? I'm taking a nap, too.

Perfect example of why I hate Yelp. Icing on the cake is that bitch ain't even know what neighborhood she in.

[Pavlov's Bell]

^^

Cliff's Notes:

Novel-like introduction.

Ironic use of "urban language".

Referring to a country in its native language.

Lack on subject knowledge by referencing incorrect neighborhood of store.

EQUIVOCATION - only "reviews" one item in roughly 150 words.

Hackneyed joke in another novel-like outro.

Someone needs to but this bitch out her misery.

[on-display]

haha know her. corny

[squirtlepk]

tell her that isosceles triangle eyebrows really match her korn

[Bona Drag]

*bites knuckle*

[DaBestSpoona]

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=WIC_nJomSrGevnHAEHzHPA

"Though many would say that "best" and "Brazilian" shouldn't even be in the same sentence together, I'd like to disagree cause I just had THEE best Brazilian wax I've ever had. Period."

Guys she keeps her poon nice and neat!!!!!

[Bona Drag]

Eugenia L.'s I Salon Review

Category: Corny

Neighborhood: My Spank Bank

Three and a Half Stars

I gotta say this started off pretty well, as her pic is nice and I really dig door knockers on non-black chicks (I mean, obviously I like them on black chicks too, but it's just kind of obv, you know? But I digress...). Plus the review had me thinking about her vag, which in this case is a good thing.

All of a sudden, though, we're talking about bruising and bleeding around said vag and I'm like what? I mean, don't get me wrong, the rough stuff works in the right context, but there are limits. This kinda reminded me of when you're like deep into some free porn site and click the wrong link and see some stuff you wish you hadn't.

Anyway, things don't get too much better as I learn that the salon owner is named Dorris and Geta is the chick doing the waxing. Geta maybe works; if I try hard I can picture some 6'1" German blonde with broad shoulders, possibly wearing some sort of latex bustier getup...only then I find out she's Nepalese. Not necessarily a bad thing, but not where I was headed with this. And I don't think I need to tell you that Dorris is one of the least sexy names of all time; the second r just pushes it over the top.

Still, 'sweetie' kind of rights the ship, and 'no matter how much you do it, it STILL hurts' is money in the proverbial bank (see above); again, a little rough stuff can def help. On a related note, the sound effects could also pertain to duct tape, which may or may not be a component of a certain fetish that I will def not admit to having in this forum. You get the idea, though.

Another mention of Dorris in that last paragraph, but it doesn't matter cause we're pretty much all the way home now. Honestly, three and a half may be a little high, but let's face facts: based on the picture alone, I'd smash and so would you.

Bottom line: will def revisit this review when I'm sitting in bed with my laptop.

[Vampyrvargfesten]

Kasumi M.

http://www.yelp.com/user_details?userid=HiYPfYJD4VN_jvXwxs6H8w

this girl is ridiculous

...

Williamsburg girl who can't mail stuff properly

and who is too poor for opening ceremony

[haploid]

i feel like i feel like i feel like i feel like i feel like i feel like

instant sign of cornyness