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NYC Subway Stories


TheBrokeDJ

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here's a retelling:

I was headed downtown and the 6 train just pulled in. There are a few people ahead of me and they start to go in the car and then all of a sudden they just back out. I looked in and there is a homeless guy sitting on one of the car's benches with his dick out pissing up into the air, almost hitting the bench across from him. So a bunch of people and I back out and go into the other doors of the same car and we are at the opposite end of the car from the dude pissing. It smells like straight up beer more than urine. Everyone is laughing and covering there nose when all of a sudden a bunch of piss comes rolling down towards us from the other end of the car as the subway starts moving. I hopped up on top of a bench so it wouldn't get on my shoes, but there was a guy trying to like tap dance to avoid it, but it eventually got all over his kicks. As soon as the train stopped we all moved to another car.

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location: downtown platform of 6 train, 116th street stop.

a ghetto white kid decked out in flashy 80s hip hop clothing is doing fancy dribbling with a basketball. between the legs, around the back, all that shit....showing off basically. it's obvious that he wants people to notice him.

a ghetto black guy walks up casually, then smacks the basketball into the tracks. the white kid stands there scared not knowing what to do, looking as if he's about to cry, and the black guy walks back to his original position, leaning against the wall, as if nothing happened.

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here's an alright one:

I was heading uptown from the financial district on the N train last year and these like 16 year old girls decked out in all kinds of expensive gear asked a guy if the train went to the city. the guy said "well we're in the city," and they replied "well, I mean like, times square, you know."

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6 train @ 51st - greasy tan mullet wayne newton doppelganger wore some ridiculous cardboard sign, reading some crazy shit about him being an alien from another planet and jesus.

covering his face with a piece of paper, he went on ranting "YOU HUMAN WOMEN AREN'T WORTHY ENOUGH TO LOOK AT ME. DON'T EVEN STARE AT MY DIRECTION....

EXCEPT YOU IN THE BLACK"

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Halloween 2008:

I am leaving FIT after getting mad shitty with Dino and crew, all dolled up in my banana costume and whatnot. Jump on the downtown 2 train. For some reason the train pulls to a dead stop at 18th and the conductor starts blowing the horn. 2 is express so I was like, wtfffff lets go. Then the conductor comes on the intercom and says "ladies and gentlemen, there is a fight on the train, I have alerted the police and they are on their way".

He keeps blowing the horn, but the train is still stopped. After a couple minutes I peak my head out the door and see these four dudes just wailing on each other on the platform. It's 2v2, and one of the dudes with his back to me pulls out a bottle and smashes it on another dudes head. The kid drops and they run down the platform towards my car. The other two dudes jump up and run to catch up with them. The kid who busted the bottle on the other dudes head jumps into my car cause it was the fullest, and these two white chicks sitting next to me start balling their eyes out. They start screaming about how they read on gawker about gang initiation night or whatever, and they get up and go to where I'm standing. The kid starts trying to hide himself behind people and makes it to where I'm standing with these girls. He grabs one of them, she's freaking her shit, and he is basically trying to hide behind her. Kid was no older than 16 or 17, and he looks spooked. So then the dude that was with the kid who got the bottle busted on his head steps into the car, runs up on where this kid is, pulls out a gun and starts waving first at the kid behind the two girls, they're basically about to plotz, then he pushes right behind me and I have a gun pointed at my chest. And I'm dressed up as an 8 ft banana. Shit got super surreal and simultaneously hyper real and I step aside and push the kid out of the car and he bolts. Dude runs after him, but they run out of the station at the end of the station exit, and the other dudes must've been long gone.

Then the police finally arrive (all overweight and useless). I'm too fucking shocked to even step out to give a statement, but the two white girls who are like gripping each other, and rightfully so. Shit got REAL.

Anyways, that's my subway story.

And it still took me another hour to get back to fucking Staten Island. The rest of h\Halloween was good though.

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crazzy jeep, and ohsnap....

I was on the A train going into Bk(i fucking hate Brooklyn), to meet up with some friends. Its like 10-10.30 at night a bit early. A homeless man walks into my cart, sits across from me reaches in his coat and takes out this huge ass sword/ knife. I got a glimpse of the knife and instantly started looking down at the floor. He's holding the shitt, and looking around waiting for some one to make eye contact. After like 2 stops, he gets up and starts pacing back and fourth down the train aisle. i swear no one got up or moved. I felt like a hostage at that moment.

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another retelling:

F train between W 4 and E Bwdy - giant (like "had to duck to not hit his head to get out of the subway" giant) guy with 2 girls on metal leashes talking for about 5 stops about how people judge other people based on their appearance, even tho they get into depraved shit just like everyone else

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From nyc thread

Train : 2

I remember like a group of 4 black kids were conversating or whatever real loud some H.S kids getting on in lowe manhattan ..

They were saying nigga after every word.. and the train was mostly full of white people so I'm standing up just observing this. Then one white guy says

White guy : "Do you know what that word means? , individuals use to get murdered because of that word and your using it like its nothing"

Black kid : "In all seriousness suck my dick"

It was funny but still uncalled for lol

Train : S(Shuttle from Grand to Times Sq )

These trains sometimes get crowded to over capacity when everyone is running so everyone gets in train pushing occurs and all that. 2 spanish ladies start to holler and scream at eachother and shit. They begin to fight and the train starts to move , funny thing is no one is breaking this fight up of two older ladies(30-40 yrs old) mind you , the train is packed ass shit and they're falling back and forth and bumping people. I could definitetly identify the tourist they were scared as shit worried faces lol . Now its a 2 vs 1 because one of the ladies was with her daughter , so now finally people decide to break it up scratches and blood and shit on each of the ladies. lol ahh man

Train: #1

Standing up in a packed train we're at 42nd street times sq so it's definitely real packed people still cramming in. This one guy knows he cannot fit but still insists in coming in the train so at this point hes halfway in / halfway out then it says " Stand clear of the closing doors please" it closes and it closes him lol.. like the door had a seizure basically and kept closing and opening real fast on him ahahahah his face was priceless as everyone watched. The conductor says on speaker " Move from the door , or it will continue to close you up" lol he finally gets off then train goes.

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6 train @ 51st - greasy tan mullet wayne newton doppelganger wore some ridiculous cardboard sign, reading some crazy shit about him being an alien from another planet and jesus.

covering his face with a piece of paper, he went on ranting "YOU HUMAN WOMEN AREN'T WORTHY ENOUGH TO LOOK AT ME. DON'T EVEN STARE AT MY DIRECTION....

EXCEPT YOU IN THE BLACK"

FUCK I KNOW THIS GUY.

my sister told me about him once, and i didn't believe her. Then i saw him for myself. He refers to himself as the earth angel.

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FUCK I KNOW THIS GUY.

my sister told me about him once, and i didn't believe her. Then i saw him for myself. He refers to himself as the earth angel.

SAYWORD? where did you see him? as i was leaving the train, i called his ass out for what he was -

an attention whore

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Guest Snackman

I got a call around 8 pm friday night from one of my friends saying that they found me a new sofa. I recently threw out my old one cause some bitch shitted all over it after she fucked with a whole bottle of goose goose.

So I proceed to meet him at 60th and lex and I saw him with a few of my other friends with this really nice seude couch. I was like shiiiit, yall mawfuckers just done made my night. Then I realized that I had no fucking way of getting this shit back up to the cribs (93rd park).

So we sat on the couch for a bit and smoked a few cigs then decide to just walk with this motherfucker. After bout 3 blocks we realized we would deadass freeze so we did like anyone would do. Take that bitch on the train.

So now we got a big ass couch at the 6 train turnstiles and the ladys all scraming from the booth saying "you cant take that shit on the train". We promptly started throwing up fuck you'se and opened the gate and took it to the front of the train.

So the train finally comes and we board the bitch to the amazement of the people inside. We had to turn this bitch sideways like 3 times to get it on and we bit some spanish dude in the head and shit.

anyways we got that shit back to my cribz. pics tommorow.

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I got a call around 8 pm friday night from one of my friends saying that they found me a new sofa. I recently threw out my old one cause some bitch shitted all over it after she fucked with a whole bottle of goose goose.

So I proceed to meet him at 60th and lex and I saw him with a few of my other friends with this really nice seude couch. I was like shiiiit, yall mawfuckers just done made my night. Then I realized that I had no fucking way of getting this shit back up to the cribs (93rd park).

So we sat on the couch for a bit and smoked a few cigs then decide to just walk with this motherfucker. After bout 3 blocks we realized we would deadass freeze so we did like anyone would do. Take that bitch on the train.

So now we got a big ass couch at the 6 train turnstiles and the ladys all scraming from the booth saying "you cant take that shit on the train". We promptly started throwing up fuck you'se and opened the gate and took it to the front of the train.

So the train finally comes and we board the bitch to the amazement of the people inside. We had to turn this bitch sideways like 3 times to get it on and we bit some spanish dude in the head and shit.

anyways we got that shit back to my cribz. pics tommorow.

damn

that's some niggerish shit

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location: downtown platform of 6 train, 116th street stop.

a ghetto white kid decked out in flashy 80s hip hop clothing is doing fancy dribbling with a basketball. between the legs, around the back, all that shit....showing off basically. it's obvious that he wants people to notice him.

a ghetto black guy walks up casually, then smacks the basketball into the tracks. the white kid stands there scared not knowing what to do, looking as if he's about to cry, and the black guy walks back to his original position, leaning against the wall, as if nothing happened.

Reading this story actually made me laugh. lol

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I got a call around 8 pm friday night from one of my friends saying that they found me a new sofa. I recently threw out my old one cause some bitch shitted all over it after she fucked with a whole bottle of goose goose.

So I proceed to meet him at 60th and lex and I saw him with a few of my other friends with this really nice seude couch. I was like shiiiit, yall mawfuckers just done made my night. Then I realized that I had no fucking way of getting this shit back up to the cribs (93rd park).

So we sat on the couch for a bit and smoked a few cigs then decide to just walk with this motherfucker. After bout 3 blocks we realized we would deadass freeze so we did like anyone would do. Take that bitch on the train.

So now we got a big ass couch at the 6 train turnstiles and the ladys all scraming from the booth saying "you cant take that shit on the train". We promptly started throwing up fuck you'se and opened the gate and took it to the front of the train.

So the train finally comes and we board the bitch to the amazement of the people inside. We had to turn this bitch sideways like 3 times to get it on and we bit some spanish dude in the head and shit.

anyways we got that shit back to my cribz. pics tommorow.

10char. hell ya

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