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My Holiday gift wish list is EPIC.

JewDiamondPhillips

By JewDiamondPhillips
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JewDiamondPhillips

JewDiamondPhillips

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My 2006 holiday gift wish list:

-a juicer

-Tony Danza's 1978 softcore porno movie

-a flamingo-print bulletproof vest

-Blues Clues DVD set

-The Wire DVD set

-one night of boozing and heavy cocaine use with Rob Lowe

-a pair of purple Jordache jeans

-a bulletproof tuxedo

-an IV that pumps gravy into my veins at all times

-a linguine thong

-a gold handgun

-quiche recipes

-to go halves on a baby with Jessica Alba

-a signed Rae Carruth Carolina Panthers jersey

CHYEAH.CHYEAH.CHYEAH.CHYEAH.CHYEAH.CHYEAH.

Grind like a peppermill.

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