Purplesaurus Rex and Mountainberry Punch

[julzkind]

why is it still only rated 4 stars?

[mrip]

came back to read the stickied thread

now i came and have a sticky head

[julzkind]

salaryman on that koolaid tip

when im sick i need an iv koolaid drip

make me bounce back, that purplesaurus rex

gotta have koolaid when makin sticky sex

and bouwnt doesnt use wooden spoons to stir

thats cause theyre porous, yessir

[salaryman]

Its like that time.

When your brother came home late from school. You thought he missed the bus because he's done that before. Or maybe him and his little asian friend are playing gameboy somewhere. Or maybe they went to the park to throw rocks down the slide, or something stupid. Maybe he took the long way home so he could see the Paterson's dog. Or he had to stay late at school because he said shit in front of the teacher again.

Where the hell is your brother?

I don't know mom, he wasn't on the bus. I thought maybe he was walking home or he went to Luke's place.

What do you mean he wasn't on the bus. Its almost 5:00. Get in the car now.

She shuts the car door hard without even noticing. She's worried, and now so are you.

But, you're barely out the driveway when you see him walking up.

I'm going to kill that boy, she says, before she can see his face.

But you can tell already he wasn't at the park.

What happened to you? Why are you bleeding. Where is your backpack. I said WHY ARE YOU BLEEDING?

I got in a fight, they took my stuff.

Leave him alone Mom.

Get in the house.

Next day you both come home late. Sitting in the kitchen, you wonder what she's going to do. You can feel your legs dangle under the counter. Your feet will touch the floor next year, but his still barely reach halfway.

Where have you been?

We were out.

Eric's mom called. She said he's got a black eye.

I don't know anything about it.

She looks at you and looks at him. She turns around slowly, and with her back to you she says, don't you ever, ever, ever let someone hurt your family.

She puts down that big plate. That thanksgiving turkey plate, the one you've only seen twice. Once last year when grandma came to visit and the other time when Dad's boss did. Its full of red and green cookies. You look at him slyly because you both know its a Christmas cookie recipe. But its ok because its the best one she has, maybe its the only one she has. Who cares, she never makes cookies, especially not on a wednesday afternoon.

So she talks about the dog, the car, the weather, and everything else, and the three of you sit there eating, pretending red and green sprinkles are normal in july. pretending you don't have a big scratch on your forehead, that he doesn't have a swollen lip and a cherry kool aid moustache, that she doesn't know exactly whats going on.

45 points for a Black Cherry Big Man Backpack

[TransparentCranium]

Its like that time....

45 points for a Black Cherry Big Man Backpack

I almost teared. (0)

[Ahlvahroe]

this had turned out to be a great thread.

remember when you were a kid and decided to add kool aid mix to vanilla ice cream. you choose tropical punch, of course, cause it is the most versatile of teh flavors. you tell everyone that it is delightful, completely lying to yourself cause not only did you waste some koolaid but ruined some ice cream as well.

[salaryman]

Kool aid and ice cream.

Been there. I tried it on corn flakes too. And sprinkled on wheat toast for a pixie dust breakfast.

But without sugar it wrong, tastes like detergent. The powder does not, cannot, stand alone.

Try it in frosting. Great Bluedini on vanilla. on cake. Pina-pineapple chocolate cupcakes.

You could make bootleg freeze pops. Wooden sticks in plastic ice trays.

Purplesaurus pieces on sweaty summer days. Freeze pops for frugal folks, someone said later.

[chmercer]

dude can you read this stuff over the top of an m83 music video or something

stellar

[mr fluffernutter]

man, i used to have a drawer in my kitchen dedicated to koolaid and koolaid points.... poor man's juice.

[salaryman]

Or syrup. it can be a flavor syrup. and tie dye.

Like in 5th grade. Its the school wide field day. We're talking wheelbarrow races, sack races. Kickball tournaments. 4 square duels and dodgeball death matches. Expansive, epic serious schoolwide games. Elementary gladiators. Playground sovereignty. Year long bragging rights on the line.

Butch PE teachers wield shiny chrome whistles, yelling at crying girls in thick glasses and fat kids with no hustle. You see kids sweat who never played tag in their life. You see teachers in safari hats and beat up nikes. You wonder if they know how to run.

Roarin Rasperry snow cones drip down sticky fingers. They're dropped in the dirt, discarded in barrels. Tide white t-shirts turned acid trip Tangerine or Tropical punch. They 're bent and contorted by tight rubber bands, come out all crazy with kool aid on your hands.

Principal Martin wears shorts to the playground, blinding white legs draw stares from the kids. Some girl with tight braids calls him ashy and old. You're not sure what it means, but it sounds about right.

The crab walk is always your event and you should have it locked this year too. But you start to get nervous when you see the competition.

Its not fair, you say, wait,

they shouldn't let him race.

Tall Jerry's been in 5th grade for three years straight.

If you mention that one more time today, you'll be back in the room.

Ms. Brown looks at you, and you smirk, half askew.

Just sayin, you know.

just saying, its true..

So there goes the crab walk, and the sack race too. Then wheelbarrow down, and not much is left. Jerry's won everything and think he's some champ. His ribbons each pinned to a part of his shirt.

Three Berry Blue

to your Cherry colored two.

Last race of the day is the three man relay. Jerry strolls up and invites you to join. Its a guaranteed win if you run on his team, but fuck jerry daddy long legs and his bullshit scheme. You'll take you and your boys vs. Jerry and co. Long legs the dumb vs. class clown and scum.

Your boys fall behind and its not looking good. You're anchor vs. Jerry and time's running out. He'll have a head start and he's already huge.

The middle men close in on lap number two, it'll be just you vs. those legs in that last final stretch. So Jerry's ahead, but not by too much. He's off just before you, but you get a great start. Your feet are so light, you can't feel the ground. You can't hear the steps, or the people around. Two strides behind Jerry, you turn on the gas. You don't his face or the second you pass.

Crash through the finish and your heart thunders to a slow.

They pat you on the back. That was dynamite they say. Lightning, what a show.

210 points for kicking kiwi lime trainers.

[evisu 2000]

tl;dr but tang is awesome kool-aid sucks.

[TransparentCranium]

read it!...

[salaryman]

tl;dr but tang is awesome kool-aid sucks.

False.

Tang is an inferior product which markets itself as a breakfast drink, hyping some vitamin C bullshit.

No variety. No pitcher-headed mascot. No points. No purplesaurus.

Might as well go drink a fucking juice box.

Next.

[evisu 2000]

hyping

No variety. No pitcher-headed mascot. No points. No purplesaurus.

tang is more than just pr.

[salaryman]

Touche.

What is it then?

[please underestimate]

this guy in drumline brought a 2liter bottle full of koolaid today during practice. he left it on a spot in the parking lot where he can watch it. around an hour later we see this black girl drive up to the kool aid, open her door, steal it, and drive off.

what the hell man.

[salaryman]

man, i used to have a drawer in my kitchen dedicated to koolaid and koolaid points.... poor man's juice.

Mom kept ours in a wooden box on the kitchen counter. Point collecting was a family initiative.

The box smelled like brown sugar and we were only allowed to open it once a week.

On Friday, we stacked up the points like cash, and counted them like bank robbers. It was always the same, 3 more than last week. I have memories of constantly dreaming of the big prizes, but never actually having enough to order them. I don't know where the points went.

[renski]

Mom kept ours in a wooden box on the kitchen counter. Point collecting was a family initiative.

The box smelled like brown sugar and we were only allowed to open it once a week.

On Friday, we stacked up the points like cash, and counted them like bank robbers. It was always the same, 3 more than last week. I have memories of constantly dreaming of the big prizes, but never actually having enough to order them. I don't know where the points went.

Your mom was secretly collecting and cashed out for he raft. Maybe she still collecting for the big prize.

[robbie]

IMO

[renski]

someone brought koolaid to the company party. I remembered this thread and had to bump it.

[salaryman]

[Ahlvahroe]

damn time hella flies! had it really been over a year since this thread was started. wow!