Spastic_Koala

having a conversation with my girlfriends mom about my relationship with her daughter, she looks me dead in the face and says, "I like you, but I dont want you to marry my daughter."

ouch.

but honestly what do you say to that? superawkward

....we've been together almost 3 years

It's probably because you're 21. She still views you as young and immature. And being a 21 year-old, she's probably right for the most part. Which is okay. Assuming you stay with this girl and don't do anything to piss her or the mom off, then by the time you hit your mid to upper 20s, the mom will be okay with you two getting married. If you two are looking for that kinda long term commitment in the future, of course.

There's no good available pho in my area. Makes me weep.

^ It has entirely too many Likes, dawgs.

while we're on the subject

I love white girls rapping

TSDFmf4IFNE

also, the variation on HAANH at the end is great

J22oaWCZGGw

is walmart a department store just like kmart (which we have in australia), or is it something completely different?

We have both in the US. Walmart and K-Mart are very similar. I'd say the only difference is that Walmart is slightly trashier.

At Walmart you don't need to be fat. But if you're not fat, then you need to be either trashy or crazy. Walmart shoppers need to have a particular minimum ratio of fat/trashy/crazy. So if you're low on crazy you need to be higher on fat or trashy.

An example of a non-fat Walmart shopper. You can see there's crazy abound.

You can still catch herpes from an unwrapped BJ. Sounds like you lost the condom before you started fucking her. Which implies you made the conscious decision to have sex with her unprotected. You trust her?

Kinda looks like he's sucking on her titty in the last one.

i wonder if having abs like that, you have to clean between your abs like sometimes you get lint in your navel.

No. My abs aren't deep enough to capture lint/debris. Even big burly (and shredded) bodybuilders shouldn't need to. The angle of the indents between the abdominal muscles isn't steep enough to trap stuff.

Speaking of which, gay thought moment, I like to look at pictures from bodybuilding competitions.

Would have looked better if he cuffed.

I was vegetarian for the first 20 years of my life. My parents brought me up that way. While it wasn't really that hard, I wouldn't go back. Discovered the joys of meat. But I can understand and appreciate the choice.

I see. I never lived in Queens, so didn't know it was like that.

Papa Smurf takes care of his ladies.

I have an urge to see this posted again.

Start lifting weights. You can take some of that aggression and frustration out on heavy inert objects. It'll boost serotonin levels. You'll also meet people at the gym.

The easiest thing to do in the world, though...go for a walk. When you're starting to feel really down, instead of popping open a bottle of whiskey, strap on your brand new pair of New Balances and take a stroll. Who cares if it's hot. Explore your immediate neighborhood. See if there are any parks or trails nearby. Find a random shop and walk in. You live in Queens, right? Jump on a subway and head into Manhattan. Wander around, explore, find new things, try random new food. Going for a walk is really easy, can be a great distraction, and can reveal new things. If anything, you'll get a little exercise, boosting those serotonin levels again.

I'm not a big proponent of religion, but do you attend a church? If so, see if they have any activities that members your age are doing and see if you can join in.

Yeah, I really doubt that's the first time that's happened to her. I've had my wife tell me "Drive safe" when leaving the house for work and responded with a "You too" when it's obvious she isn't driving anywhere.

Awkward, but it happens.

so i visit family in orlando every christmas.

my mom and i ask my uncle (her older brother) if he can drive us to laguardia airport on a early december sunday morning (6AM, to be exact) because our car can't fit all the luggage. he gets irritated and throws out a string of excuses like:

"i'll ask my wife first"

"why can't you drive yourself?"

"i don't know"

to give you some background, we've never once hesitated when he asked us for a favor or needed help. we ask him directly if it's a yes/no. he repeats the above excuses a few more times.

the final nail in the coffin is when he ends it all with, "you're paying for gas, right?" at this point, i can't believe what i just heard. my mom hurriedly says "of course." he just responds with, "i don't know. i'll see."

many of my other family members are exactly like this. i've learned the hard way that although you will always help family in a heartbeat, they won't do the same for you. i'm still half chuckling, half pissed that he even said "you're paying for gas, right?"

Your uncle sounds like a dick. I have similar family members who I've bent over backwards for. Yet if I ever need anything (and it's always minor cause I don't trust my family with major stuff) they always act like it's a huge inconvenience. I kinda have "disowned" many of them - mainly by moving far fucking away - and would like to write off the rest (except immediate family). A bunch of my loser cousins are redneck hillbillies anyhow.

I like Koalas.

Spastic Origin:

mid 18th century: via Latin from Greek spastikos 'pulling', from span 'pull'

Koala Origin:

early 19th century: from Dharuk

Reference: Oxford English Dictionary

Circle jerk, +rep!

To be fair, it's more than just pants. It needs to be a pair of jeans from a list of pre-approved Japanese denim brands. Macro shots of details score you more points.

He slowly approaches the camera...

you already fucked her. why'd you stick around to watch?