newaesthetic

My confession is that I very badly miss the days when Pandora was available here.

the former. it came about by mentioning i went to a loft party on nye. and this from a girl who shops at uo and aa. i uh, dunno.

i don't know how to avoid sounding creepy in that situation. just me though, no hate.

i was just told i am 1- fronting, and 2- a hipster, by my ex. who decided to randomly text me at 3am. hahaha.

-continue purging things from my life i have no use for. it's a liberating feeling compared to the near-hoarding the rest of my family does.

-cut caffeine out completely. this will be the hardest; i don't drink coffee, i have maybe a pop on it's own once a week, but mixed drinks are usually coke. oh well.

-get back into exercising daily. i miss the energy it provided.

-take pictures daily. there will be a break when my camera goes in for fixing, though.

So to add to the fact that my gifts to my family were all gift certificates (since they asked for them specifically), I also didn't wrap them, or put them in bags, or anything clever. Our Christmas eve dinner saw all the kids go through way too much wine, and I passed out when I was supposed to wrap them up. Woke up still drunk, hangover kicked in when unwrapping started. Curse you, wine.

I actually like wrapping, my mom taught me well, but my step-sister is on a whole other level. Puts a bunch of folds into them, creates strange patterns, and generally makes gifts look like art. Feel bad unwrapping anything.

Most frustrating: the past week I haven't been able to get someone off my mind. It hit me out of nowhere and it's all the time.

that's crap. i've gotta work today too, but at 3pm, and only for a few hours. new years reso: to not make such last minute plans next year.

i had this vision of a chicken farm with little ball-chickens, minus their wings and feet. why? i ate five pounds of chicken wings throughout the day (breakfast, lunch, dinner) being stuck at work and a coworker brought it up. now i just picture them, rolling around...

I am still pissed I was stuck working all day boxing day. ps3 was actually on sale? figure i'll need one for whenever gt5 is finally out.

what, kids under that age should be getting boo shirts?

yeah, all you peeps getting stuff before the day - wat. secret santas are an exception, but family gifts? i was always allowed to open one present as a kid on xmas eve... and it was always pajamas.

i can bet money i won't get clothes as gifts; family has no idea about the stores i shop at, and know they're not in town anyways, or offer gift certs, so they just give me cash.

i feel like a chump this year, bought almost exclusively gift cards for the family. step sisters always get the same thing every year (we're all boring), and my dad and his new wife specifically asked for restaurant and home improvement gift cards. new house needs stuff, and they like dining out. got my dad a sweater and her two bottles of wine, those are the only surprises.

damnit scott, that sounds appealing.

i'm gonna cook off another two pounds of ground beef and have some tacos in a bowl. which is what i did last night too. need to clear out the fridge.

and wtf to people viewing houses on xmas eve? i've got two couples coming through tomorrow.

i've been living in an essentially empty house for the past two months. the solitude thing is a nice change of pace and i can focus on me, but i definitely am out as often as i can find time for it.

i feel dirty for watching so much gossip girl lately, but it also makes me realize i'm coming to nyc before the summer. sup scott?

oh, and confession: brought a girl back to my place three weeks ago from a bar. was pretty drunk, and while it wasn't all awkward and nothing was really held back, it wasn't as good as my ex... who i saw two days before. who has a new boyfriend. definitely pulled a quagmire when i woke up and the girl was still here.

my cell's got some weird homesickness or some shit. whenever i crash at friends' places, the battery drains overnight. saturday night went to bed with a half battery at 2am, and the damn thing woke me up at 6 with a low battery warning. it typically takes 3 days to die from a full charge.

broken_dubz.. I'm with you..

i've been getting too good of use of the new privacy settings..

lurked every single person I've been meaning to but had previously had their photos blocked..

With this came me figuring out five girls I knew in highschool.. who are my age or younger.. are now pregnant.

I also confess that I get no greater secret personal joy than seeing girls my own age and younger pregnant. I'm not sure why, other than if an 'oops' ever happens to me I won't feel so bad.. or maybe I'm shocked at the fact that they're engaging in sexual activity.

i figured it out the other day: all the girls i know from high school who are pregnant or have little hellspawn are not married. all the girls who are married don't have kids. bizarre.

single life is good, but holidays have a weird effect on me since this is the first time i've been single during them in 5 years.

bump for hamilton duder. would've taken ov tank if i hadn't missed it.

it's that air of desperation, probably.

she makes trashy look trashy.

i hate it when you watch a movie already and then a girl ask's if i want to watch it with her.... and because I want to mess around I end up paying to watch it again.

so technically i'm paying to mess around with her. technically thats prostitution.

dude. dating in general...

i hate that the nearby grocery store has cinnamon toast crunch on sale, so a family box is cheaper than a normal one. i can't stop myself.

i don't want to ruin the surprise, but mine is being delayed to be sent to an alternate address. the original shipping quote of $95 was just stupid, so I'm adding bits and pieces to mine before it ends up being sent out next week.

sadly, it won't be arriving to my buddy until the first days of the new year. but i don't want it sitting around potentially being returned.

Oh, and my package from EvilCrayon was picked up a few days ago, just need to get my camera in working order and then I'll open it up!

i'm not going to pretend i'm not excited:

http://www.apple.com/trailers/paramount/ironman/

I don't get the paranormal activity scared concept. I watched it alone, in an empty house, completely dark at 2am and was utterly bored. Timer speeds up, timer slows down, rumbly bass noise cues up, rinse, repeat.

We're only stardust.

sorta same situation as destructo (word to kyles): have yet to tell my father I'm not going back next semester, and that this is extending into an entire year off. my head's just not in it, and i really regret not taking a year off between high school and uni. i had just turned 18 and wasted a few years in a course i hated, switch schools and programs, but was just spreading myself too thin with work and school. i think if i ever do decide to have kids, i'm definitely not doing what my parents did and not put a penny into savings for them. yeah i learn the value of putting myself through school, but they don't understand the stress that also brings (since neither of them ever did anything post high school).

i have an idea of what i want to do; or at least, what i'm passionate about and enjoy doing to the point i could happily make a life out of it, even if it's not the highest-paying job out there. i just have to figure out how to go about getting to that goal. i also want to to be able to get back into school in september without the stress of working four days a week.

at least moving back home was done at the right time; my dad and his new wife got a new house but still need to sell his old one, so i've at least got that to myself for the time being.

i've lost 8lb in 10 days due to this stupid sickness and the odd raw spot on the roof of my mouth. it's like i ate a ton of s&v chips or something, without the deliciousness usually involved. i decided to quit babying it and eating so little; walked over to the grocery store at 1am, dropped $90 on a bunch of shit, and couldn't feel better (other than the continued pain when eating).

ben and jerry's too?! hell yes. i'm not going to be robbed of the best half-a-month of the year for gluttony.

also, this has obviously fucked with my sleeping habit. going to bed when it starts getting light, waking up when it's dark. ugh.

on the contrary; thank you joey for being a size smaller than me. or else i'd be trying to explain to family why i gave up the christmas shopping half-done.

seriously... ugggghhhhh. the petroleum is so nice. stores need to stop pussying out and buying more pieces like that.

When he did my JR's a year ago they were sent out. Guess it just depends on what his current load is.

It's going to make for a seriously messed up open to the 5th season. You could see it building up to this for a while but I didn't think they'd actually go there. Wow.

grn apple tree hoodie. it looks like burlap.