sawn-off chef

i rarely get to wear high fashun cluthingz cuz of my dayjob:(

wut the hell to do..my co workers might think im gay or queer.

only sufu fam and friends understandz.

i'm thinkin of unloading xs-s RO and Cloak to supermarket..ultra:(face..

i will dip into the savings account probably if you do this, pm me some stuff you have. i need to cop something right now, too depressed haha.

i always worry about girls fathers more, but to be honest, the relationship some mothers have with their daughters borders on the pathological.

i mean i'm not a runway model with a huge bank account or perfect by any means, but i am a gentleman and polite and her mom never really iked me, it was weird. but even her i miss, i just don't take well to drastict change literally overnight i guess, but i'm learning to.

i think if this were a novel the scott-dad relationship subplot would be the one that kept me reading. sounds heavy. the guy obviously has a few impossibly over-protective notions about his daughter, himself.

i haven't even started about her mother yet pal.

I'll be honest you have no one to blame but yourself. pick yourself back up and go with the flow dont be bitchmade and punk out when a bitch is digging you and honestly 11 months is too short of a time to propose gotta get pass the 2-3yr hump ya feel? im not gonna say hope shit works out for you because from what i read its totally up to you where things go from here

yeah i said the same thing to her and to myself, i in no way deny it being my fault, i just want to right the wrongs i've done, ya know? and by the time i was gonna propose it would've been 2 years so i figured that it would've been okay. and as of now i'm back on my feet and pushing on head first making sure this shit doesn't fuck up, it's too important to me man.

fuck man... that is the very definition of helplessness. i hate it when shit starts snowballing out of your control like that. it's kind of shakespearean tragedy in a way; a few decisions that seem almost trivial end up providing completely unforeseen (and unforeseeable) consequences. sounds like more than you can get out in one post.

why does her dad hate you so much? i've always been in sweet with my various girlfriends parents but i did get very curious about what it would be like to be unaccepted (let alone loathed).

why don't you just go with her to chicago? seems like a cool city from the little i know. and if shit hits the fan again (which it can very easily do) then you can always move back?

that's some heavy right there kixslf. that sort of situation might very well lead you to believe life is shit...

well thank you baeyer, yeah it's very shakesperean in my opinion, and it's just as shitty to experience as one would imagine. now in order, her dad hates me because i broke her heart and changed his daughter to a near hollow person for 3 monthes between the break up and this week. he used to love me, like ADORE me, he'd let me drive his car, give us money to see a movie or go out to dinner or anything, he even played wii with me on multiple occasions, more of a father than i could ever dream of and a true role model. it's actually so saddening to know that he thinks lowly of me because his opinion is one of the most important to me regardless of my so far internets is serious business reputation. and i will go with her to chicago if she'd still let me, as of now she just officially forgave me and trusts me again, and not to be a lame ass but it was a serious and emotional thing but we worked it out i think. and the only way things wouldn't work out was if she ended it because i'm not fucking this up a second time, no sir, there'd be no moving back, just taking the plunge from there. now all thats left is to sit, date, and wait i guess.

and kix i'd actually love to hear your story as well, it is superconfessional.

I'm the master of writing overly long posts but thats a definite TL;DR post, sry dood.

haha its okay jeep, i cannot blame you, i'm surprised how long it was.

thanks for the neg-rep. i was half serious though. what the fuck is up? explain or tuck your vag back in.

it's superconfessional... not supercomplainwithoutreason. are you british or something?

get ready, i was with this girl for 11 monthes, her and i spent literally every moment together and fell very much in love, but college was approaching and i went to community college. things started getting a little tense and i broke up with her fearing that she'd abandone (childhood trauma concept) so i broke up with her, downed if memory serves shy of 30 shots of rum, and hooked up with a person she said she didn't want me talking to when we were dating. well the day after that i regretted it, continued drinking and went to the halloween party she was at to try and talk to her, piss drunk again. however the cops came, i got arrested and had to go to court. that led to me getting in a huge fight with my grandmother that i lived with and i ended up leaving her residence on top of having to pay $200 in alcohol education classes and a 50 dollar fine. well i started speaking to her again recently and apologized for everything i did, and she and i have been treading lightly but everything hit the fan today. she told her father that we were talking again and i really respect and admire her father and kinda wish he was mine, but i ended up destroying his and my relationship along with my girlfriends. her and i are back together now and like i said he knows that we're talking. it turns out he loathes me and forbids her and thought she was better than to let me back into her life, so i'm in a bad boat there. she's heart broken by me and damaged by it and i was the cause of all of it even though she won't admit it. well it turns out she told me tonight in a laying everything out on the table about heartbreak and what i've done that she was gonna bring me with her to college, now i know it sounds like i'm extremely whipped but fuck it i don't care, its the internet, not that serious, i just need to vent. anyway, i would've been invited with her to go to chicago and i'd have taken it up in a heartbeat but i pussied out the day before she was gonna tell me. so now i'm a wreck living with knowing that the one thing i'd been working towards and wanted was destroyed in front of my own eyes by myself. we're still talking as i type this so we will see where it goes but i'm scared.

always a shitty rant concept (noobie).

edit: i forgot to mention that i was going to propose to her on her birthday/ graduation, whichever seemed more fitting. i don't care bring on the neg rep.

myself. for ruining everything over one person who never even cared about me. i miss 3 monthes ago, i'd give up all the jawns in the world for a way to undo everything.

i figure someone ought to take this thread a little seriously, my plan is to go into nyc with my girlfriend and get dinner somewhere, no idea where though yet, wanna do something nice but don't wanna push 200 for the meal alone, then some flowers, and who knows what else, thats the plan for now though, it'll be our second valentines day together so i'm pretty happy.

good: did absolutely nothing on my last day of break.

bad: did absolutely nothing on my last day of break, and i have to wait until friday to see my girlfriend again.

i need advice on what to do seeing as i don't exercise and my recent forray into waywt made me realize i have to. any way to slim down? i'm 5' 6/7" and weigh 140.

maybe it's just the angle, i mean i'm not tall by any means, i'm only 5'6-7", but i'm certainly not like 190. i weigh 140 so i guess if thats not skinny i'll have to settle with that. but thank you for being constructive chrono, also it wasn't an exactly flattering angle.

i am sure it looks better in person the photo is taken lo-fi

dude looks like ray liotta in that pic

yeah it was taken on a macbook in my basement, i'll steer clear of the waywt until i get a better one, because it fits fine in person, though i figured i'd end up in here.

sell me shirt and jeans, they look like shit on u better on me.

hahaha no thanks, i'll keep them.

shout out to team yoohoo!

today:

geller himalaya shirt,

cloak grey herringbone jeans,

beat up black cons.

the downtown area is relatively small, but the rest of the city is rather large and diverse so you would have to be a bit more specific as to what youre looking for

there are rich, gay, republican, liberal, ghetto, yuppy, salty, fucked up neighborhoods and people all around here but it seems like you have a romanticized idea at the moment

if you're seriously considering it then i would recommend to just make a visit out here

also think about the surroundings areas 30 minutes outside the city as there are mountains, national forests, etc if that's your thing

well i'm not gay or rich so thats not really what i'd be looking for, liberal whatever, i don't really care. what's downtown like? whats a sufu type of area, no way of saying that without sounding like a tool. people into this kind of fashion and so on, people that shop at blackbird and so on.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F9ONw72pUyY

looks kinda similar amirite?

having to wait until tomorrow to see her.

i ended up getting dinner with my ex girlfriend, whos now kinda my girlfriend again? it's really complicated and i broke her heart but she's slowly letting me back in, i'm gonna do things right this time. we split some chicken fingers, caught up, kissed alot and so on. i proceeded to drive home an hour in heavy snow and skidded all over the highway doing 35 mph. got home, talked to her on the phone and went to sleep the happiest i've been in monthes. second chances are the best feelings on earth.

i've been really drawn to the idea of transferring to a school in seattle and living there, i really like the idea of the climate and i've always loved the thought of it but have no idea what it's like, i'd really appreciate input on it! anyone who lives there or the blackbird guys, any help please.

only six, but i'm trying to get more active on the boards, might get the family point and shoot and take some mediocre waywt's.

i actually have to agree that bomber-man was so perfect.

this is a process of a still life, really good post-rock.

its late at night, back when i lived in new york there was this amazing 24 hour deli that made this sandwich that was coined the cluckin' russian. it was chicken cutlet, bacon, provolone, and russian dressing on a roll, it was the perfect thing for this time of night. sorry no pics.

i hate: distance, having to say goodbye, fucking up and waiting 3 monthes to make ammends, not being with her right now. also her father who is a second father lost respect for me which is so upsetting, i generally don't feel bad about short comings or other's opinions but this situation really fucked me up. glad things are working out though for myself, 09 had a bumpy start but its getting better already.