almondcrush

ims ad the evisuse are leaiving

but

i am hppy theyr going to diddly

just got in

remembered i had a camera two blocks from my flat

lovely twilight

ULmXI8Yym7M

home sweet home

hello fellows

i am blasted

and for whatever reason i cannot put down kierkegaard

translation: i did not get laid tonight

kicking the shit out of seventeen year olds

while tremendously satisfying

really is not worth the potential legal repercussions

keep your head up sidney

ive been pretty good about photos for the first half of my last week with ebi-chan

i figured i might as well show our jeans new jersey while we're here

naturally, our first stop was the mall

here we are mere seconds before being asked to leave victoria's secret

this was actually after being asked to leave sharper image

here we are living our princess fantasies at the disney store

our new pal guapo

bling like blaowing at express womens

a very poorly choreographed picture attempt at macys

a candid shot of pure terror

here we are with my old lady

(get it)

ebi-chan catches stares where ever we go

i would have liked to give diddly a smooch along with the denims

i suppose a lipstick smeared postcard will have to do

sorry for the blackout

i found the cable for the camera i've been using though

here's a closeup of the patch damage i took last week

cracks are a bit more pronounced now

perhaps the lizard can heal its wounds with some good love (and maybe some obenaufs)

age is a number

life is once

if you want him, take him

Ok, see how you like getting yelled at for no reason when something that isn't on sale in the food store you work in.

was this supposed to be a burn

your kung fu is weak, brah

(as is your command of english)

my member is 1/8 chinese

im not sure of the exact ratio of it to my face

but i want to say like 10x mag would probably cover it, if i was like semi turgid

if i can find a tape measure i will do the math and get back to you

why do all the pandas who post use pictures of chinese members

the recent alcohol-centric triteness of my life keeps me up at night

ironically drink is the only thing that will help me into bed

i am whatever u say i am-eminem

lolz

isnt avy from thomas how 2 taper guide

didnt think diddy bc use "niggaz" so frequently

but maybe diddy bc use

tbh i think if diddy would be funnier

dollar pints and fifty cent slices make a great argument for afternoon drinking

only spent twenty dollars today and i am still a bit buzzed

i have 2 infractions. yay

probably because youre gay

^ just used the knife parts of two waiters corkscrews like pincers

i confess that i got skilss

also i confess that i took a detail shot of the patch damage on the dd+1 jeans

i coudlnt find the cord for the cam

so i took the card out and slipped it into the card reader

but the card was one of those tiny duo ones

and the reader in my laptop is old scchools

so now the card is lost somwehre in my computer

i am such a coochtease

wait, so almondcrush, you just turned 21???????

if you mean to ask if youve been an accessory to underage drinking, then yes

thanks for the well wishes everyone

yesterday was the start of week three with ebi-chan

we didnt see much daylight today

thirty drinks and no vomit made for a pretty gnarly hangover

id take dduk over mooncakes any day

thirteen shots for the dd+1

(and another ten for good luck )

ha nalreps, enjoy your tip... you've been crowned.

sid adult circumcision is a difficult decision

you really shouldnt poke fun

our two week long binge was interrupted with an overnight hospital stay this weekend

(sorry no pics)

however ebi-chan will be there for my first legal bar crawl this evening

hopefully tomorrow we will have shots of our first hot vomit soak

in the meantime here is a picture of the 'sus and i eating brownies homosexually:

it was nice to see you waistside

come visit sometime

we can go dior home in menlo

more like poo-keepsie

am i right