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The Official Do/Marry/Kill Thread


operationjake

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we have all, most likely, played this game in our adolescent lives. it is now time to play them in our young adult/old adult/whatever lives.

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how to play: someone posts a list of three people (notice i said people, and not women/men). then, upon your own choice/sick mindedness you quote that post and reply with which of the three you would do (sex, fuck, screw, etc.), which of the three you would marry, and which of the three you would kill (and precisely how). then, when people get bored of the current three people, we move onto another three. once you have made your choices it works best to crudely or humorously EXPLAIN WHY. this is the fun part. ex: "i'd do pam anderson instead of courtney love because a) i'm pretty sure kurt cobains rotted dick is stuck in courtney as a perm. dildo and if i didn't screw pam, i'd be part of the .23% of men who haven't." etc.

disclaimer: initially it works best to start with celebrities and/or well-known individuals outside of your group of friends (i.e., people on sufu), but eventually we will most definitely dive into the abyss of sufu members.

let's start things off...

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HERE IS THE FIRST TRIPLET (from henceforth the next "set" of people will be referred to as triplets):

JESSICA ALBA (circa "fantastic 4")

CAMERON DIAZ (circa "there's something about mary")

SCARLETT JOHANSSON (circa anytime she has the tits she has now)

so... who would you do, who would you marry, and who would you kill?

Fuck Alba - do I need to explain?

Kill Diaz - ughhh so annoying.

Marry Johansson - she seems so lovable! and cuddly and stuff.

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I would fuck Jessica Alba until my semen ran out of her ears in rushing torrents of flowing ejaculate.

Cameron Diaz would be covered in small gashes and then covered in lemon juice yet her vocal cords would be cut so she couldn't scream.

Scarlett Johannson would be the one I marry because she could certainly feed a litter of our kids with those sweater cows.

fixed it for ya.

Reasoning can be found below.

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dtqzRxUHnY&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dtqzRxUHnY&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

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fixed it for ya.

Reasoning can be found below.

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dtqzRxUHnY&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dtqzRxUHnY&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Good sir, I know when to admit that I was wrong and I today I was wrong.

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Alright, I'll stay topical and controversial:

1) Hillary Clinton

2) Condoleeza Rice

3) Sarah Palin

bad triplet.

mostly cause i only know hillary clinton.

But i couldnt marry or fuck her cause her twats got remnants of Lewinsky.

So shes got some controversial pussy. Actually now that i think about i may reconsider just because the controversial fucks are the good ones to tell yur buddies about afterwards

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haha.

i would...

marry condoleezza rice (because her mouth is ridiciulously large in comparison to her head, which probably means she can give a blowjob like a hooker with no teeth... AKA very very well)

fuck sarah palin... cause she's a miwmlftboo (mother i would most likely fuck the brains out of)

kill hillary... how? well, i'd prob shove bill's sax up her snatch so far i'd be playing Eb and G# next to her kidneys. then i would push her out of the top of a ferris wheel.

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Guest youkinorn
I don't think HBlack fully understands the rules.

Fuck Jessica Alba,

Marry Scarlett Johannson,

Push Cameron Diaz out of a moving vehicle.

I think he fully understands.

He would fully do, marry, and kill Boy George.

The particular order is unclear.

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