Superawkward

[dovo]

hahapete meetup cali edition?!

Edited April 25, 2012 by dovo

[jakie]

She told me she once spent half an hour 'channeling god' once. I am not sure what that means so I asked her. She said it was like she was on PCP and DMT at the same time, could see the entire universe, and could touch people's souls.

I am not sure if she was trying to be funny, if she was serious, or if she's just insane.

man you obviously havent tried DMT (+pcp combo). on my last trip i was abducted by aliens.

[jbanger]

hahapete meetup cali edition?!

dovo + hahapete = gold

[Helsja]

when you see someone waving and you wave back.

then you realize they were waving to someone near you.

[Augustus]

pcp & dmt combo sounds like a bad idea.

[zenii]

I was at some house party, went to use the bathroom and after I do my business and wash my hands, I realize there's nothing to wipe my hands. So I do the whole "try-to-wipe-as-much-as-possible-on-jeans-and-hope-rest-will-dry" thing and I exit, where my friend who was also waiting for the bathroom is talking to some chick. He introduces us to each other, and she goes for a handshake and right as I reach for her hand I'm like "oh fuck my hands are still kinda wet fuck fuck fuck" and sure enough, when we shake hands she gives me this weird look and kind of mutters under her breath "why are your hands wet...". thankfully right at that moment the guy who went in the bathroom after me comes out flailing his hands and says something along the lines of "damn there's no towels in there" and she has this look on her face like "oooh..". needless to say I avoided her for the rest of night.

[Spaghettini]

if you haven't made a joke about someone's dead mother at a party that was thrown in her memorial, had some girl psycho-thug you out into being her boyfriend, or made a sexual reference to an in 'n' out employee, do not post in here

[mr fluffernutter]

one hallowe'en i went to a haunted house with some people i didnt really know and i mentioned that a great costume would have been to shave your head for 'chemo-patient' ... get so much sympathy candy or something

and then one of the girls was all "my mom has cancer, you asshole" and i was all "shut up harlot"

yes i know cancer isn't necessarily funny

Edited April 25, 2012 by diamonds

[OkayOkay]

In n Out stories continue...was just at the one in West LA night before last with a buddy, we're going through the drive through and we get to the window. He's driving, and the girl at the window hands everything off and my boy pauses to smile and say thank you, it didn't seem at all long or delayed, but for some reason she's like "what, do I know you or something?" in a hella mean tone, and this bitch was not appealing at all, so def no confusion there...but he's hella nice and trying to say he was just smiling to be a nice guy, an the explanation goes on and suddenly everyone is honking and it's that awkward in between where nobody knows what to say. She just stares with this "move along" look...and all he was doing was just trying to smile and be nice...the smallest thing got so blown out of proportion...was funny tho.

[hahapete]

man you obviously havent tried DMT (+pcp combo). on my last trip i was abducted by aliens.

She pulled a Bill Clinton and told me that while in high school she smoked weed once but didn't inhale. That's the only drug she claims to ever try. She is pretty clueless about drugs.

hahapete you are from california? can i meet you two ?

Yeah, I'm from California. I'm sure that one day in the future we can meet.

I am waiting for what she will do when she finds out that I talk about her on the internet. Hopefully she won't be too mad, eh?

[mr fluffernutter]

she will probably think it's endearing cause she's fucking nuts

[funkdoobi]

In n Out stories continue...was just at the one in West LA night before last with a buddy, we're going through the drive through and we get to the window. He's driving, and the girl at the window hands everything off and my boy pauses to smile and say thank you, it didn't seem at all long or delayed, but for some reason she's like "what, do I know you or something?" in a hella mean tone, and this bitch was not appealing at all, so def no confusion there...but he's hella nice and trying to say he was just smiling to be a nice guy, an the explanation goes on and suddenly everyone is honking and it's that awkward in between where nobody knows what to say. She just stares with this "move along" look...and all he was doing was just trying to smile and be nice...the smallest thing got so blown out of proportion...was funny tho.

this!!!! i had the same exact shit happen to me once.

I was in a client meeting and looking at this lady talk about her company and their brand position as I was there to rebrand their advertising and packaging materials. while she's talking, a couple of jokes were made, so I was all happy and smiling. she looks over to me about 5 minutes into her bullshit and is like, why do you keep smiling?

I go, "I'm just acknowledging what you're saying, I'm sorry if my smiling bothers you?..."

then she gets up and storms away from the conference table acting as if what i said was so insanely offensive to her that she couldn't stand to be there anymore.

I turned to everyone else there (was about 8 of us) and said, "um, did i do something wrong? was smiling a crime?.."

one guy looked at me and was like, don't worry about it. she's a cunt. i laughed and nodded.

she came back about 5 minutes later, 'cooled off', and the rest of the meeting went from happy and cheery to tension-filled torture.

[dovo]

a girl tried to talk to me today. i went to say something and wound up burping in her face. damn.

[Spaghettini]

not even sure dovo really exists

[dovo]

[evilgeniusdan]

my favorite part is when dovo negs his own posts. also milhouse.

[Denton]

can someone write some kind of script to automatically +rep every dovo post in this thread

[philosophiliac]

a girl tried to talk to me today. i went to say something and wound up burping in her face. damn.

laughed so hard a dick came out of my nose

[infamousmilli]

Started cooking randomly while I waited for lecture started. The girls in front of me were having a conversation and the one looking at me started laughing at my antics. The girl she was talking to wanted to know what was funny so she turned around. Didn't notice she turned around and I end up hitting her titty. Needless to say, I didn't go to lecture.

[dovo]

Nah man you should have went. Everythings cool until you grab one. if i had a nickel for every boob i hit while doing something stupid id be a rich man who happens to run into boobs a lot.

[Vampyrvargfesten]

tell us dovo

what part of your body did the boob(s) touch you???

[dovo]

im tall so i always wind up getting a tittie to either the elbow, mid back, or or my stomach. stomach to boob contact is my favorite. to bad i don't have washboard abs then the hoes would have something to enjoy too, but i don't. swag.

[hahapete]

How tall are you, bruh?

I'm six foot four and was recently yelled at by a chick because to talk to her I had to look down at her and she thought I was looking down her shirt. I honestly wasn't but as soon as she said something about it you know I took a gander.

I feel like I ain't even that tall but I have tall people struggles.

[wurm]

How tall are you, bruh?

I'm six foot four and was recently yelled at by a chick because to talk to her I had to look down at her and she thought I was looking down her shirt. I honestly wasn't but as soon as she said something about it you know I took a gander.

I feel like I ain't even that tall but I have tall people struggles.

The fuck? I'm 6'1", maybe 6'2" and I constantly get told how tall I am (I live in US). 6'4" is TALL (caps) by any standards.

Edited April 27, 2012 by wurm

[halomunkey]

How tall are you, bruh?

I'm six foot four and was recently yelled at by a chick because to talk to her I had to look down at her and she thought I was looking down her shirt. I honestly wasn't but as soon as she said something about it you know I took a gander.

I feel like I ain't even that tall but I have tall people struggles.

fuck you, I'm like 5'5"

[hahapete]

The fuck? I'm 6'1", maybe 6'2" and I constantly get told how tall I am (I live in US). 6'4" is TALL (caps) by any standards.

I guess I've always just seen tall being taller than me.

I just made myself look like an idiot. Ha.

[dovo]

How tall are you, bruh?

I'm six foot four and was recently yelled at by a chick because to talk to her I had to look down at her and she thought I was looking down her shirt. I honestly wasn't but as soon as she said something about it you know I took a gander.

I feel like I ain't even that tall but I have tall people struggles.

Im about 6'3 - 6'4 where i hang out, I'm a giant.

edit: I feel where hahapete is coming from. it all depends on where you're at. I can hang out with a certain group of people and be average or even the shortest du there or chill with another and be the jolly green.

Edited April 27, 2012 by dovo

[philosophiliac]

Started cooking randomly while I waited for lecture started. The girls in front of me were having a conversation and the one looking at me started laughing at my antics. The girl she was talking to wanted to know what was funny so she turned around. Didn't notice she turned around and I end up hitting her titty. Needless to say, I didn't go to lecture.

i read this with super awesome connotations. just got the superawkward possibility just now

[StrangeLove]

I was walking my my nephew earlier today and a group of girls (4) said nice jacket to me... I said thanks and started walking faster.

[Lozinski]

Im about 6'3 - 6'4 where i hang out, I'm a giant.

edit: I feel where hahapete is coming from. it all depends on where you're at. I can hang out with a certain group of people and be average or even the shortest du there or chill with another and be the jolly green.

I always imagined you as 5'7-5'10. Your posts are going to be even funnier now for some reason...