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I've been legit depressed for the last ten years. I've spent weeks and even months not leaving my apartment virtually not doing anything productive. I've seen multiple "professionals" and I've taken multiple types of anti-depressants and anti-psychotics and the only thing I find that helps me cope with depression or making sense of life is by completely immersing myself into something. I can be anything really, for me it's weightlifting. Some people may put you down because you're so passionate about something and they don't understand it because they think whatever you're passionate about is stupid but you can put down anything and point out how meaningless anything is because whatever meaning anything has is entirely subjective and varies from person to person. The more I think about things, the crazier and more depressed I get because I never find absolute answers, only more questions. 

 

I don't believe in seeing psychiatrists, therapists and other "professionals" because I think that at the end of the day, they just want your money and don't really care about you no matter how genuinely caring they might come across. They just want to put you on whatever medications they're paid to prescribe and go home with their big fat paychecks. 

Edited by MenageATrois
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I don't necessarily agree with that last part. 

 

Though, I have found that having regular sessions didn't benefit me any more than deciding to go when I felt I really needed to. (In my case, this amounts to roughly once a year, just to get shit off my chest if I'm feeling overwhelmed and/or don't feel like it's stuff I can tell family and friends about or don't feel like burdening them with.) 

 

Also, the health care professionals I've interacted with will only prescribe meds as a last resort. 

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I'd say they're a majority. I would never take their place - imagine all the fucked up shit they hear everyday. Would you do that for money? Having to not only deal with your problems, but 5 other people's - who are invariably more fucked up than you - at the same time. Some may not have particularly perfect manner, but they know how to deal with the things you're going through. A psych would have to have zero empathy to not care about the well being of their patients. And there are a variety of methods they can prescribe before even bringing up pills, which work quite well for a lot of people, including different thought processes and patterns, meditation techniques etc.

 

Of course, there are always going to be incompetent people in any field. My free counselor at uni is pretty alright, it's good to have someone you can literally tell anything to.

Edited by froople
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my first year of college has really... displaced me.  

 

after one night "greening out" on bud, i had a major identity crisis and since I haven't felt the same.  i've become immersed in my head, and very depersonalized.

 

i was pretty depressed for a fair bit, starting 2014.  I've been going to CAPs, and while it helps, I dip into bad thoughts about myself in relation to others, the world around me, among other things.  Sometimes I have delusions of grandeur.

 

it feels as if all of my childhood and adolescence, I was building up these sentiments and thoughts, and come college, it all came pouring out.

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I'd say they're a majority. I would never take their place - imagine all the fucked up shit they hear everyday. Would you do that for money?-.....

you are not in their position, you did not choose the career they did. so why assume a point of view on their situation that is based on assumptions and is not even remotely realistic

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There are definitely some that legitimately want to help but they're a minority.

 

making some massive generalisations here man. (speaking from v. limited experience) I must have gotten pretty lucky as all the counsellors/psychs I've spoken to have been great - and most have treated meds as a part of a balanced regime, if not a last resort

 

Have you seen dozens of these and they're all uncaring douchebags or are you just pulling this out your arse based on cynical social stereotypes?

 

also, from a purely selfish perspective (seeing these guys helped me) - who cares if they're only in it for the money or whatever - if seeing a counsellor helps you in any way then take advantage of that shit all you can. if not then obvs find someone/something which can.

 

edit: that being said I agree with your point about finding something you're passionate about and putting energy into it - at least to show yourself that you can enjoy, put effort into, and be good at something.

Edited by philosophiliac
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you are not in their position, you did not choose the career they did. so why assume a point of view on their situation that is based on assumptions and is not even remotely realistic

 

lol, why have this discussion at all then? why assume the opposite? tryna reassure him here. most psychs would probably not say they're in it for the money - of course it always plays a part tho. I prefer the optimistic view on health professionals. 

Edited by froople
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I don't believe in seeing psychiatrists, therapists and other "professionals" because I think that at the end of the day, they just want your money and don't really care about you no matter how genuinely caring they might come across. They just want to put you on whatever medications they're paid to prescribe and go home with their big fat paychecks.

although i sympathise, this is ridiculous. are some psychologists and psychiatrists like that? sure, but most aren't. also, most other people working in social services who aren't psychiatrists (grief/trauma counsellors, intake case managers, social workers, mental health nurses) probably work in the most criminally underpaid sector that exists. many of my colleagues days comprise entirely of working with people who are going through a divorce, victims of sexual abuse and/or domestic violence, losing everything they own due to debt etc and in the process earn an average salary at best. whilst its one of the most underpaid and under appreciated areas, it also has the most passionate people (i'd say bar none) working in these positions. they are doing what they do because they want to help, there definitely is no 'prestige' (a psychiatrist is the exception) + often there is also a huge lack of personal support available. you have these dickheads in wall street that everyone idolises who get paid absolutely ludicrous amounts of money and then you have this whole other area of people who are genuinely trying to make a difference in vulnerable people's lives and no one gives a shit.

Edited by conqueror
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even psychiatrists (compared to other MDs) are criminally underpaid/are in the least prestigious medical specialty there is. these are people who went through eight years of post-bac training at least to make about $150k a yr. not that that's bad by any means (it's pretty great) but compared to other career paths most psychiatrists could have taken it's not a ton. a lot of psychiatrists could easily have been anesthesiologists/radiologists/surgeons and made 2x as much. i'd say you have to have a passion for it. as mentioned social workers/therapists etc get even more screwed pay-wise.

 

anyway reading this thread as a relatively psychologically healthy person has been really helpful. psychiatric disorders are way more common than we realize bc of stigma/privacy/societal pressure and it's always good to remember that we often have no idea what the person next to us is going through. get better y'all and get the help you need

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Got really sick around Christmas time from a bacterial infection from eating something bad at a restaurant and was sick for about a full month. I got an antibiotic for the infection and I'm feeling 100% better but my main symptoms were not being able to sleep well, tossing and turning all night, and throwing up constantly for over a month. I was barely able to eat anything and I developed a good bit of anxiety because of it all.

 

Once I realized I was having anxiety in addition to the stomach bug I started seeing a psychologist and have been going to therapy for 3 weeks now. The anxiety has gotten a lot better in the last 2 weeks. My main anxiety problems have been sleep related. I could be fine all day but then when I go to bed at night I would start suffering panic attacks. I've usually been able to get them under control by doing breathing exercises and relaxation techniques.

 

I've just not been feeling myself lately. I lost 15+ pounds and haven't been able to gain any of it back. I'm usually pretty active, either running, cycling or lifting weights several times per week but since getting sick I haven't had any motivation for it. I saw my doctor again today and he immediately prescribed me 100,000 units of vitamin D which should help me immediately. On doctor's advice I'm going to start setting aside some time every day for some form of exercise which should also help with the sleep and anxiety.

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I saw my doctor again today and he immediately prescribed me 100,000 units of vitamin D which should help me immediately. On doctor's advice I'm going to start setting aside some time every day for some form of exercise which should also help with the sleep and anxiety.

He's just trollin u unless u actually had vitamin deficiency. 100k units? hope it's a 3 month prescription or sumthin. your body can absorb that much VD. i feel like you just gonna shit it out. the weather in ATL not that bad. have u not gone outside at all.

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The vitamin D prescription was for a year, taking it weekly for a month then every other week. Same doctor has my wife on it as well and my inlaws so I think he just likes giving people the D. Weather isn't that bad but I generally stop running/cycling in the winter in favor of just going to gym but ever since getting sick I have been having a hard time motivating myself to even do that. Been getting pretty good sleep most of this week and feeling better overall. Started back lifting a few times this week and getting my diet back on track should help. Once I got sick I started eating a lot of garbage which certainly hasn't helped.

Edited by xchen
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  • 2 weeks later...

I've made a ton of progress since I started up school again and gotten rid of a ton of my anxiety and I feel like my depression has gone way down.  But I still can't get my self esteem back and it feels like I'm never going to be happy or like myself again.

 

Since I've started working through this whole thing I've done a ton of shit: gotten articles published, gotten better with photography, learned a lot about bike mechanics and what not, gotten more involved on campus, etc, but I still have thoughts of not being good at anything and just can't get my self esteem back. Shitty 

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when you get something published or have something go your way - do you get a sense of accomplishment/achievement? it's sometimes hard to aknowledge your own successes no matter how small or big they are. if you can find a way to allow yourself to feel good about your chievements/successes then that is a huge step forward.

 

talking to the schools counselor might be of some help. or just talking with anyone you trust about it. sometimes we just need a reality check and we see something in a different way and it helps us feel better about ourselves.

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got "promised" a substitution (don't know the exact term in english, i'm a teacher) of 5 months and last Friday they told me it wasn't possible after all, words cannot describe how sad and depressed I feel now

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what's the line between being in a temporary slump or being full blown depressed?

 

i've been in a slump the last few days. i feel disconnected from my family and friends. i want to be alone, but i want to have attention from other people

 

i've been on vacation from school. i'm hoping that immersing myself in schoolwork or s/t will distract me enough to put me in a neutral state

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when you get something published or have something go your way - do you get a sense of accomplishment/achievement? it's sometimes hard to aknowledge your own successes no matter how small or big they are. if you can find a way to allow yourself to feel good about your chievements/successes then that is a huge step forward.

 

talking to the schools counselor might be of some help. or just talking with anyone you trust about it. sometimes we just need a reality check and we see something in a different way and it helps us feel better about ourselves.

Starting to get some sense of achievement back when I get a good story published or things like that.  It just blows because over the past couple of years I let my self esteem take a 180.  Getting it back a bit but I don't know when I will feel content with myself.  I've already bettered myself a ton but I just can't feel good about myself and I always think of things I'm not good at (sports of whatever) or in my head think of the things I "Can't do" (trying to break out of this pattern of thinking). Lots of feelings of inferiority compared to anyone else and worthlessness.  I used to be super content with myself and was content with being a journalist and working on photos but now I always feel like I need to be good at other things, but even then I feel like I will always feel like I'm missing something.

Maybe I'll take up competitive cycling or some shit.

 

what's the line between being in a temporary slump or being full blown depressed?

 

i've been in a slump the last few days. i feel disconnected from my family and friends. i want to be alone, but i want to have attention from other people

 

i've been on vacation from school. i'm hoping that immersing myself in schoolwork or s/t will distract me enough to put me in a neutral state

Everyone gets those feelings and gets in slumps.  You just need to be careful and see if it persists, especially if you start losing interests in things or feel your self esteem go down.  I just ignored it at first, acted obnoxious and like an asshole, then it all built up and it was "full blown depressed" as you said.  Make sure you have someone you can talk to and like I said, if it builds up don't ignore it.

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my first year of college has really... displaced me.  

 

after one night "greening out" on bud, i had a major identity crisis and since I haven't felt the same.  i've become immersed in my head, and very depersonalized.

 

i was pretty depressed for a fair bit, starting 2014.  I've been going to CAPs, and while it helps, I dip into bad thoughts about myself in relation to others, the world around me, among other things.  Sometimes I have delusions of grandeur.

 

it feels as if all of my childhood and adolescence, I was building up these sentiments and thoughts, and come college, it all came pouring out.

Just saw this post. This is very similar to my freshman year.  I let it build up for a few months and let it get really bad.  Make sure you recognize it early so you don't get worse. I just sort of broke myself down mentally and didn't talk about it to anyone.  Been trying to gradually get rid of the worthless and inferior thoughts but it has taken a ton of work. 

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  • 3 weeks later...

I feel like a lame for posting in here so often but w/e. What have everyone's experiences dating with depression and anxiety? I've been hesitant to do it since I just feel shitty randomly and don't feel confident in acting as "the man" if that makes sense.  I guess the best way is to just do it like I have with other things and see how it goes/pretend to be confident. 

 

I was doing a lot better and felt like I was finally building up some self esteem and toned down a lot of my anxiety and lonely feelings and then they just came back for no reason at all. Shitty

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Problem with dating to me was if they are worth it letting your guard down??

The only way to know is to go on that first one.

After that don't get all heavy on them. And pick a strong minded one , one that doesn't go whining along.. Or you both be getting miserable

Edited by aso2004
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is being an asshole/hating everyone a sign of depression or am i just an asshole? (serious question)

 

It can be. 

 

Theres such a thing as 'functional depression' - Stereotype of depression is crying/unable to get out of bed, basically stuff that becomes fucking obvious pretty fast and will probably get you fired from your job.  

 

I'm 100% positive there are plenty out there who trudge along in their life being functionally depressed - maintaining appearances enough to not arouse suspicion/get fired and basically just going through the motions without being happy. The other day I saw a guy in a suit openly checking his prescription of cipralex on the train.

 

Question to ask yourself is are you happy with your current situation? Is life working out for you? Or is your unhappiness and frustration manifesting itself as cynicism/passive aggression/hatred towards others?

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Problem with dating to me was if they are worth it letting your guard down??

The only way to know is to go on that first one.

After that don't get all heavy on them. And pick a strong minded one , one that doesn't go whining along.. Or you both be getting miserable

Probably good advice.  I just mean that I still get bouts of depression and the anxiety can make me feel generally afraid so I'm worried about dating someone and if I would tell them and all of that.  Also makes me kind of nervous because a lot of the girls I'm into are sort of badass haha.

 

And to the conversation up there, the hating everyone can definitely be a sign of depression and I feel like I'm back to that again. Last year I was pretty depressed/anxious and didn't realize it so I just kind of acted like an ass.  After hitting a super low point I've put a ton of work in bettering myself and trying to become more confident but now that I have a bit of the self esteem back I feel like I'm back to the negative/passive aggressive feeling and I've just been feeling angry all of the time. 

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Probably good advice.  I just mean that I still get bouts of depression and the anxiety can make me feel generally afraid so I'm worried about dating someone and if I would tell them and all of that.  Also makes me kind of nervous because a lot of the girls I'm into are sort of badass haha.

 

Still can't believe that one of those badasses decided to stick with me.

Think I told couple months in that I am a grumpy bastard sometimes. And if I was like that it wasn't her fault. Finding someone to share that burden and who is trying to cheer you up was one of the best things that happened to me. She is still a badass and tells me to stop whining now and then but also knows that she has to give me some space and TLC when that is due..

 

So dating can be a good thing too..

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you should stop overthinking shit, it's a big, big reason why you're suffering. 

It's an interplay of genetic factors and environmental factors that leads to depression.

 

It's pretty well established that individuals who are "earnest" (?) and take everything seriously are more prone to developing it than those who don't give a shit about fuck. You can't really tell those people to stop overthinking – because they just can't.

 

Also, I hypothesize that there's some sort of tipping point / threshold for coping with stressful events. The difference between healthy vs. unhealthy is how low that threshold is, and it is most likely genetically determined. 

Edited by herpsky
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