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denimdestroyedmylife

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I like the idea of being productive but I have no self discipline and can't bring myself to actually be productive. Sometimes I daydream of how awesome it would be if I just got shit done in a timely manner and got my life organized, but when I go to do it I cringe away and numb myself with useless entertainment 

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i've had issues with a group of loose pit bulls in my neighborhood this past year. they have charged me and others.  i've called the police and animal control several times.  all they can do is warn the owner that their dogs are getting loose but, until there is an "incident" nothing else can be done.

 

yesterday i'm running late for school and i drive by said dogs scratching and clawing at a fence. turns out, they tore the dog in that backyard to shreds.

 

the worst part is, since no one actually witnessed the "attack", animal control can't do anything.  the guilt is heavy.

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i'm now making all life decisions based on what's going to get me the most oral sex from eastern european girls

Edited by boy better know

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i'm now making all life decisions based on what's going to get me the most oral sex from eastern european girls

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I like the idea of being productive but I have no self discipline and can't bring myself to actually be productive. Sometimes I daydream of how awesome it would be if I just got shit done in a timely manner and got my life organized, but when I go to do it I cringe away and numb myself with useless entertainment

 

 

i really feel this. it's actually starting to drive me insane. i'm in uni this semester and i wrote my first paper the night before it was due. i'm doing well enough in my classes, and i know exactly what i need to do to get A's, but for some reason i've been avoiding it.

 

i'm doing better about getting shit done now, though. i'm fixing some smaller bad habbits which are leading me to be more productive. going to start reading again too, the discipline it takes to sit down and properly read always carries over into the rest of my life. i think i'm just thinking about too much at the moment and need to simplify everything about my life. 

 

i've gotten really obsessive over spending money on clothes. even little things. i had $60 dollars in my account, and i spent $60 on a shirt because "i get paid soon, and my tax returns will come in, and i have x amount in cash, and i'm buying it resale so it's a deal, etc"

 

it's a real problem, i'm obviously trying to fill some void. i'm stopping because i'm realizing jawnz aren't going anywhere. i don't need to dress top-tier right now just because i want to. i need to live within my means, which realistically means anything above american apparel price tier is a bit ridiculous but nonetheless i've been kopping designer joints. it's way cooler to feel / look comfortable and decent with what you can work with than to try and shut shit down every day on a college budget and the only time you get out of the house is to attend classes.

 

i feel like i'm coming out of a drunken fury thinking "what the fuck happened last night" only last night has been months

 

for what it's worth tho.... i really do have some cool clothes to work w for a while

Edited by insted

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Just had dessert crepes for dinner provided by my host family saying it was a traditional food. I think I got trolled

Edited by noobedloser

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Lool dang it , stupid auto correct.

Yeah, I meant to say crepes.

I'm studying abroad in Berlin right now and staying with a host family for the duration of my program.

It was alright, they had chocolate, jams/jellies, and powdered sugar set out. The host family said this was one of their favorite meals to have.

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feel like im spending money recklessly on things i dont need instand of saving up.
possibly to fill a gap of unhappiness in my life ? idk i dont feel particularity happy in general and sometime think i work / study for nothing. i also developed a huge lack of self-confidence these last time and been not into social interaction at all, ..since i go to school the week and work during the weekend early i dont really go out now, i havent seen friends in a while mainly because of that also. i just stay home, watchs lot of movies and read books mostly. see girlfriend at school and sometime week-end.

i feel like i dont connects with others peoples in general, only a few close friends i have. im not really friend with all the persons into my program, well school-friends but its pretty a basic relation about ; hi and bye ,

i think winter affect me a lot also, i live in canada and i hate the cold, really cant stand it., the days are short, everything is super fast, wake up its dark, go out of school its dark, possibly affecting my mood. a week im super happy, other week super depress,bipolar ? idk

i have a super nice family, a loving girlfriend, some cool jawnz ( lol ) , im studying graphic design, and i dont know why i find a way to be unhappy in general. i just hope thing got better when winter pass.

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feel like im spending money recklessly on things i dont need instand of saving up.

possibly to fill a gap of unhappiness in my life ? idk i dont feel particularity happy in general and sometime think i work / study for nothing. i also developed a huge lack of self-confidence these last time and been not into social interaction at all, ..since i go to school the week and work during the weekend early i dont really go out now, i havent seen friends in a while mainly because of that also. i just stay home, watchs lot of movies and read books mostly. see girlfriend at school and sometime week-end.

i feel like i dont connects with others peoples in general, only a few close friends i have. im not really friend with all the persons into my program, well school-friends but its pretty a basic relation about ; hi and bye ,

i think winter affect me a lot also, i live in canada and i hate the cold, really cant stand it., the days are short, everything is super fast, wake up its dark, go out of school its dark, possibly affecting my mood. a week im super happy, other week super depress,bipolar ? idk

i have a super nice family, a loving girlfriend, some cool jawnz ( lol ) , im studying graphic design, and i dont know why i find a way to be unhappy in general. i just hope thing got better when winter pass.

 

two things: if you haven't had a blood test in the last year, get one and check your vitamin D levels, also do you exercise?  Diet and exercise are things most sufu'ers are allergic to, and it's ridiculous how much of a change in your life a good diet and steady exercise regimen can do for you. While multivitamins are good, I'd suggest just getting a lot of varied, hi-quality produce/food in you. Save a jawn $ and eat some good meat. 

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yeah i go to the gym 3 times a week/ light excercices tho , like 30 min run and some machines , and as for foods i eat kinda good since half a year, less sugar/ no desserts / more fruits vegetables / lot of tea , coffee and water only / less frozen meals almost not anymore / so i dont think is that

actually im going to take a blood test like next week so im gonna see, i think my skin has a role in my mood, i have light acne that go up and down that i hate so much, blood test is mainly for that

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yeah i go to the gym 3 times a week/ light excercices tho , like 30 min run and some machines , and as for foods i eat kinda good since half a year, less sugar/ no desserts / more fruits vegetables / lot of tea , coffee and water only / less frozen meals almost not anymore / so i dont think is that

actually im going to take a blood test like next week so im gonna see, i think my skin has a role in my mood, i have light acne that go up and down that i hate so much, blood test is mainly for that

U should get on a basic strength training program check out ss Ice cream fitness all pro etc basically any noobs routine with compound exercises and progressive overload

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7 fucking minutes. 7 fucking minutes on the phone with the ex- and it turned into full-scale war. fuck this FUCK THIS noise.

"we make war, not love"

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yeah i go to the gym 3 times a week/ light excercices tho , like 30 min run and some machines , and as for foods i eat kinda good since half a year, less sugar/ no desserts / more fruits vegetables / lot of tea , coffee and water only / less frozen meals almost not anymore / so i dont think is that

actually im going to take a blood test like next week so im gonna see, i think my skin has a role in my mood, i have light acne that go up and down that i hate so much, blood test is mainly for that

I think I experience he same swing in moods based on my skin. It'll be really good and I feel amazing but every now and then blemishes just arise and I feel like shit. What is a blood test going to tell you about your skin? I walked into a doctor appt about my skin and they basically told me laser therapy is too expensive for me and gave me some cream that doesn't work. Waste of $25 copayment

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feel like im spending money recklessly on things i dont need instand of saving up.

possibly to fill a gap of unhappiness in my life ? idk i dont feel particularity happy in general and sometime think i work / study for nothing. i also developed a huge lack of self-confidence these last time and been not into social interaction at all, ..since i go to school the week and work during the weekend early i dont really go out now, i havent seen friends in a while mainly because of that also. i just stay home, watchs lot of movies and read books mostly. see girlfriend at school and sometime week-end.

i feel like i dont connects with others peoples in general, only a few close friends i have. im not really friend with all the persons into my program, well school-friends but its pretty a basic relation about ; hi and bye ,

i think winter affect me a lot also, i live in canada and i hate the cold, really cant stand it., the days are short, everything is super fast, wake up its dark, go out of school its dark, possibly affecting my mood. a week im super happy, other week super depress,bipolar ? idk

i have a super nice family, a loving girlfriend, some cool jawnz ( lol ) , im studying graphic design, and i dont know why i find a way to be unhappy in general. i just hope thing got better when winter pass.

 

 

I tell this to all guys that feel like sad, little bitchboys. Usually one or more of the following: unmotivated, down all the time, low confidence, overall beta (yea I used the word beta, so what)

 

Get your bloodwork done...

 

Specifically, get your hormones checked. I'm not saying that being a soft pud (also a symptom sometimes) is always related to hormones being out of whack. But a lot of times, low testosterone and/or high estrogen (and E2) levels are a major contributing factor.

 

It's a lot more common nowadays with all the environmental factors we have in the world today. Out of the handful of guys I suggested to get a hormone panel, 3 of them came back with low test <300ng/dL. One of them, a close friend, has <250ng/dL.

 

So stop wasting time and get it done. If you have insurance, it should be free minus a copay. If you don't have insurance, get it done privately. Should cost you $50 or so.

 

This goes to all you other sad, unmotivated puds out there.

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yeah i go to the gym 3 times a week/ light excercices tho , like 30 min run and some machines , and as for foods i eat kinda good since half a year, less sugar/ no desserts / more fruits vegetables / lot of tea , coffee and water only / less frozen meals almost not anymore / so i dont think is that

actually im going to take a blood test like next week so im gonna see, i think my skin has a role in my mood, i have light acne that go up and down that i hate so much, blood test is mainly for that

 

 

Highly recommend you ask to have the hormone panel added. It'll cost you nothing. 

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Highly recommend you ask to have the hormone panel added. It'll cost you nothing. 

Alright im gonna check that, thanks !

Edited by aymerikmd

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also, get dat TSH level checked

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That's a good idea for anyone having issues with anxiety or depression. It can be an indication of a lot of common health problems - anemia, thyroid, vitamin d, zinc or b-12 deficiency, hypoglycaemia etc, etc. 

 

It's usually a lot easier to treat physical problems like that anyway, so that's one bonus. 

Edited by timber

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^ Exactly.

 

Make sure the body is in balance before you start blaming the mind.

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