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dismalfuture

official break up thread

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Yo wut. I'd never get with a friend's ex, even if I had feelings for her before and after she'd been screwed by my friend. Nor would I be cool with a friend getting with one of mine.

 

You're telling me, when you do give your blessing, 6 months, 12 months, or however long down the line, when he finally gets with her, that he's still going to be your best friend? and you think he's going to see you in the same light once she's (snake with tits) polluted his mind?

 

There are thousands even millions of other chicks out in the wild, no reason at all to go sloppy seconds with your best friend's ex girlfriend. This isn't the set of Friends, so no need for inbreeding.

 

ALSO him telling you he still has feelings for her after the break up and won't do anything without your blessing is a super douche move. I think you need to reconsider his "best friend" status.

Edited by PHAT HEAD CAMEL TOEZ

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schoon should have ran it by the dude in the first place, everything his friend has done to this point is pretty classy from a friendship standpoint.

lol at being worried about sloppy seconds tho. people are very different on an individual level and to deny a friend's potential happiness for something so juvenile would be incredibly selfish. especially after gushing over said friendship.

ESPECIALLY especially after swooping on the girl knowing full well his boy was already catching feelings

fwiw I'm going on the assumption this wasn't necessarily a long term relationship previously by any means. the more time invested the muddier it gets I guess

friend did a solid for him, he should return the favor is all

Edited by jayrock

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To clear some things up:

 

i was with the girl for ~6 months.  When we got together she made the move on me, so I jumped at the chance.  Things between her and I ended on relatively good terms, we don't hate each other, but our feelings are one sided (she ended it).  Even though she's an ex and has a few problems (who doesn't?) she's still a really cool person and wasn't just a fuck hole to me.  

 

I'm hoping in time I can come to see her as nothing more than a friend with whom I made some fond memories.  When that day comes, I'd be more than happy for her to be a part of my life as my best friend's gf and my friend, but for now I'm not over her.  My best friend understood that and put my feelings over his own, so yeah, I'm absolutely sure of his best-friend status.  

 

Am I supposed to tell him that he can never have the girl he likes simply because I refuse to move on?  If anything would get between our friendship it would be a statement like that.  

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Man i have the best fucking friend in the entire world

 

When i got together with my now ex-girlfriend, I knew that my best friend had feelings for her.  She made the move on me and I liked her, so I dated her which in retrospect was a total dick move.  Now we've been broken up less than a month (on okay terms) and she tells my best friend that she has feelings for him.  He still likes her yet instead of dating her, tells her that he could never do that to me and then tells me about the whole situation, telling me honestly that he does like her but wants to make sure im totally over it before even considering dating her.  

 

I took her out from under him, he could have had her for himself but instead did the best thing possible for me which is absolutely incredible. 

Damn, you sound like a douchebag asshole

no hate, I guess

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I like to think that I was a douchebag asshole

 

Also, no situation is as simple as it appears on an internet forum.  I don't like to judge unless I have all the information, and I never have all the information. 

Edited by Schoon

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well gf and i broke up after 16 months

 

there was never anythign wrong in the relationship, never had a real fight but rather disagreements, never cheated on the other, genuinely cared for and loved one another.

 

however, one argument we had regarded how she was uncertain about our relationship.  we both knew she never seemed to fully invest herself in the relationship, and it was obvious i loved her more than she did me.   i think it had to do a lot with her insecurities (her last boyfriend cheated on her).  

 

we basically broke up because it seemed i was more invested in the relationship than she was

 

sorry if sentences all over the place #sadboyz

 

shes awesome, one of the most unique girls ive come across my age range.  basically everything i look for in a woman

 

idk what to do, would love to get back together.  or should i just move on? or give it some time so hopefully she realizes that maybe we're pretty good for each other?

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well gf and i broke up after 16 months

 

there was never anythign wrong in the relationship, never had a real fight but rather disagreements, never cheated on the other, genuinely cared for and loved one another.

 

however, one argument we had regarded how she was uncertain about our relationship.  we both knew she never seemed to fully invest herself in the relationship, and it was obvious i loved her more than she did me.   i think it had to do a lot with her insecurities (her last boyfriend cheated on her).  

 

we basically broke up because it seemed i was more invested in the relationship than she was

 

sorry if sentences all over the place #sadboyz

 

shes awesome, one of the most unique girls ive come across my age range.  basically everything i look for in a woman

 

idk what to do, would love to get back together.  or should i just move on? or give it some time so hopefully she realizes that maybe we're pretty good for each other?

i would be open to her reconciling but at the same time you can't be twiddling your thumbs and sitting on the sideline. tell her what you feel and then stop communicating with her.

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@tin can your girl might not like you enough and wants to fuck other dudes. Whether it be physical or emotional attraction, something is not there. I would move on if I were you. I dated a girl in a very similar situation and she never considered me to be on the same level as she did her ex. Date somebody who actually values you, it allows a much healthier relationship

Edited by Fycus

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@tin your girl [doesn't] like you enough and wants to fuck other dudes. 

0c97a92ccffc70133e490c3e064f8f311d049ba5

Edited by TresUnCool

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I said doesn't at first but I felt that was harsh so I edited it out. Bottom line is that if she was really in love with you or respected you she wouldn't question the relationship. Instead feels uncertain about the relationship and nothing was seemingly wrong - she likely thinks that she deserves more. Sad truth. Best to cut it off to show her that you deserve better, not her. 

Edited by Fycus

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We were so involved, and when things started not working out the way we needed them to it sucked for me to be the one who didn't turn a blind eye.

 

I had to end it, it wasn't gratifying and having her get her stuff sucked.

 

After that my job broke up with me because I stopped showing up on time.

 

going crazy a little bit, sucks

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i appreciate all the replies everyone

 

although i do agree with basically everything everyone has said so far, i guess the naive, hopeless romantic in me thinks there is a possibility in salvaging this relationship.  we broke up last night over the phone on facetime (lol), and both agreed to see each on saturday because we felt it wasn't right to end our relationship through those circumstances.

 

im hoping she's reevaluated things a little more by then, because a part of the reason we broke up kinda escalated from an argument about her uncertainty with me  (she feels we have different viewpoints on how our relationship should be and that has had a tremendous effect on us).  so hopefully by then, both of our heads will be a little clearer.  albeit, its only two days of no contact, but by then i will try and see if things can work out and if not then i will move on.  this isn't really an attempt for me to convince her to love me more, but rather, its to show her that i am willing to adjust my expectations i guess?  

 

the amount of love we have for each other is fine, but the problem in our relationship was that i guess i did feel like i was giving more than receiving? After much thinking  i've come to realize everyone has their own way of expressing intimacy/emotions/etc.  it wasnt necessarily that i gave too much, and received too little, but also the fact that maybe i was expecting too much from her. 

 

it was always in her viewpoint that we held different expectations on how this relationship should be, and i guess i've come to reevaluate my wants and needs in the relationship

 

 well idk my thoughts are kinda jumbled but basically gonna tell her that i realize how she feels about me, and that i know shes expressing herself the best she can and i will be less needy idk we'll see.  i'm thinking i have about a 30% chance of things working out, but whatever i'm going for it and if it doesn't work out than i realize there are plenty of other women out there.

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Man i have the best fucking friend in the entire world

When i got together with my now ex-girlfriend, I knew that my best friend had feelings for her. She made the move on me and I liked her, so I dated her which in retrospect was a total dick move. Now we've been broken up less than a month (on okay terms) and she tells my best friend that she has feelings for him. He still likes her yet instead of dating her, tells her that he could never do that to me and then tells me about the whole situation, telling me honestly that he does like her but wants to make sure im totally over it before even considering dating her.

I took her out from under him, he could have had her for himself but instead did the best thing possible for me which is absolutely incredible.

Bros b4 hos duh. He understand proper brotocol

he don't deserve that much cred.

U however didn't respect bro-code...so yr friend had every right to do whatever and u'd have had 2 turn yr cheek. U lucky yr boy got a lotta brotherly luv 4 u

Edited by SSchadenfreude

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i appreciate all the replies everyone

 

although i do agree with basically everything everyone has said so far, i guess the naive, hopeless romantic in me thinks there is a possibility in salvaging this relationship.  we broke up last night over the phone on facetime (lol), and both agreed to see each on saturday because we felt it wasn't right to end our relationship through those circumstances.

 

im hoping she's reevaluated things a little more by then, because a part of the reason we broke up kinda escalated from an argument about her uncertainty with me  (she feels we have different viewpoints on how our relationship should be and that has had a tremendous effect on us).  so hopefully by then, both of our heads will be a little clearer.  albeit, its only two days of no contact, but by then i will try and see if things can work out and if not then i will move on.  this isn't really an attempt for me to convince her to love me more, but rather, its to show her that i am willing to adjust my expectations i guess?  

 

the amount of love we have for each other is fine, but the problem in our relationship was that i guess i did feel like i was giving more than receiving? After much thinking  i've come to realize everyone has their own way of expressing intimacy/emotions/etc.  it wasnt necessarily that i gave too much, and received too little, but also the fact that maybe i was expecting too much from her. 

 

it was always in her viewpoint that we held different expectations on how this relationship should be, and i guess i've come to reevaluate my wants and needs in the relationship

 

 well idk my thoughts are kinda jumbled but basically gonna tell her that i realize how she feels about me, and that i know shes expressing herself the best she can and i will be less needy idk we'll see.  i'm thinking i have about a 30% chance of things working out, but whatever i'm going for it and if it doesn't work out than i realize there are plenty of other women out there.

Hope you worked it out but the best advice I got from my grandpa. In love give all and don't expect anything in return.People love in different ways and if you feel good at the place your at continue, if not get out. more women than empty whiskey bottles  

Edited by aso2004

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Broke up with her after she confessed to fucking someone from work for like a month now

And on the way home I was accosted by some prostitutes

It's been a shit night

Edited by pas de deux

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fuck........that sucks...are u from KL?

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you just dodged a bullet

thought you were talkin about the transgender part tbh

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LDR for ~5 months. She was gunna make plans for to visit me and asked if I was gunna pick her up from JFK. Told her no, saying how it woulda took 3 hours of my life and that 13yos can take the subway.

 

Hours later she ended things via text.

You're dating a 13 y/o? Way to go man, if those pesky judges hadn't banned me from ever being near schools I'd totally go meet some of those pint sized hotties.

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(8)..?

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Somewhere on the world wide web there is a ladyboy forum where some transgender prostitute is posting about how he ran into some sad young man who had just broken up with his gf and his fellow ladyboys are telling him he dodged a bullet cause the resulting hatefuck would have had him walking like a cowboy for a week.

 

i'm pretty sure that 'somewhere' is styleforum.

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i'm pretty sure that 'somewhere' is styleforum.

I don't get it, that's like saying it's men's health forum cause their forums are lame. Are you implying Styleforum=lame= girly faggots? Why would that be funny? Hahaha look at those guys in chinos and spectator shoes who try to speak like e-gentlemen, I bet they're chick with dicks, LOL!!

 

your sincerely,

 

Fuuma

XOXO

Edited by Fuuma

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I'm pretty sure my girl and I are going to break up soon.

We've been together for a little over two years now and it just feels so cold and lifeless.

There's no spark, no excitement, just the same thing whenever we spend time together.

It's almost like we're just doing it because it has been two years or whatever.

I know it's going to hurt but I feel like it's the best thing to do at this point.

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just ended mine after a year & 4 months, was pretty heavy but just not what i wanted anymore. friend commented a few days later that i seem happier and i do believe it's better to end it than keep it for the sake of it. gl bros wherever u are x

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Glad it's working out for you man.

We took a "break" (whatever that means) a few months ago and I was so happy.

I feel so selfish in all of this but I just feel like it needs to be done.

I'm so much more independent than she is and it's causing a lot of stress, it has been for awhile now.

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Just broke up with my girlfriend of almost 4 years, happy valentines day

 

we are pretty good friends and everything worked out pretty well lol

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